


Come In From The Rain

by AlwaysJonnorLove



Category: The Fosters (TV 2013)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-31
Updated: 2015-12-30
Packaged: 2018-04-12 05:54:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 54,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4467884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlwaysJonnorLove/pseuds/AlwaysJonnorLove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1 - INTRODUCTION

Connor looked him right in the eye. In this moment, like he had a near-death experience, he could see his life flashing before him. But he only saw his time with Connor. The small talk they'd had on his first day at school, discussing the book "A Wrinkle In Time" by Madeleine L'Engle, Connor standing up for him when he got bullied for wearing nail polish, going to the batting cages, playing games, kissing in the tent on the school trip, crossing pinkies in the movie theatre, kissing on his bedroom floor, holding hands, going to prom, Jude saw it all in Connor's eyes as Jude awaited his verdict. Jude stared at Connor for a long time before he finally spoke.  
"I don't think we should do it," Connor said.  
"What? Why… why not?" Jude stammered.  
"Because I can't stand the thought of you making that sacrifice for me," Connor replied.  
"But… I'm willing to, really, I am!" Jude tried.  
"Those last three words sound like you needed to reassure yourself, not me," Connor said, looking Jude deep in his eyes. Dang it, Jude thought, he reads me.  
"That's not true!" Jude exclaimed.  
"Jude, please, I'm willing to make any sacrifice for you, you know that, but I can't ask you to make this one for me. I wouldn't be able to live knowing that I made you make that sacrifice. So no, we shouldn't," Connor concluded.  
"But…," Jude began, but was immediately interrupted by Connor.  
"No Jude, we shouldn't do it. I know you'd be willing to, but I'm not," Connor shot at Jude.  
Jude, overwhelmed and a little hurt by Connor's sudden aggressive tone of voice, lowered his voice to the soft, sweet voice he know Connor loved so much.  
"But what about your dad? If he finds out…," Jude said.  
"Jude, I'm not afraid of my father," Connor stated, but when Jude raised one eyebrow, he quickly added: "Okay maybe a little, but that won't stop me from wanting you!"  
"Which is exactly why we should do this!" Jude exclaimed in frustration, not understanding why Connor would not want this.  
"No, we shouldn't. I can't let you make that sacrifice. For your family's sake," Connor said.

Jude shot one more look at Connor, and he knew that even though Connor sometimes was a real dork, he always took care of Jude, and Jude knew that in this occasion, Connor was right. He didn't see Connor as a dork right now, but as a wise old man, knowing what was best for them both. But Jude was right about one thing: Connor wasn't safe. Connor often got abused at home, and he was too afraid to tell anyone but Jude. Jude had always been there for Connor, and he was the only person Connor really trusted. His parents were divorced and his father had won his suit for custody over Connor. He hardly ever saw his mother anymore. His father, Adam, was abusive. Adam was brawny, fierce man who always made use of any possibility to use his fists. Adam was not afraid of a brawl, especially not when it ended in fighting. He knew he'd always win. And he did. At home, he often practised his skills on Connor, much to Connor's and Jude's dismay. They both felt helpless, as Jude had experienced an abusive foster father, and so knew in which situation Connor was. He knew that Connor didn't want anybody to know, even though it was obvious, as Connor would always have new bruises when he came back to school. Each day, Jude could spot which were the fresh bruises. Jude understood Connor's fear. Adam had once said that if Connor would blab about this at school or to anybody else, he would beat up Connor so badly that he wouldn't be able to do anything anymore for a long time. Jude understood why Connor didn't want to go to the board of the school. The board already kept an eye on Connor, without him knowing it, as they were already aware that something wasn't right, but Connor never came to them and denied it if they asked him questions, so there was nothing they could do. Lena (who was the vice-principal of the school, and also happened to be Jude's adoptive mother) had asked Jude about it a few times, but each time Jude lied to her and said that he didn't know what was going on.

But maybe Connor was right. Maybe they shouldn't do this. This plan would mean that Connor would be away from his abusive father, and finally be free, but it also meant that he'd have to take Jude with him, ripping Jude from his family, who only recently had adopted him. Jude finally found his forever family, and Connor was reluctant to let Jude leave that behind, as Connor knew that Jude had been hoping and wanting to have a forever family. Now that Jude had found it, Connor would not be able to live with the thought that Jude would have to sacrifice his family to be with him. Their plan was solid. Either they'd run away together, leaving everything and everyone behind, and find their luck elsewhere, somewhere safe and good. This would bring about a lot of problems, as they'd have to find a place suitable for two 14 year-olds, and they would have to have a job to support them, which was hard as neither of them had an ID. The alternative to this plan was to stay. Both of them. There was no way that only Connor would run away and Jude would stay behind. The whole idea behind this plan was that Jude and Connor could finally be together without any problems.

Jude and Connor were gay. They were in a relationship that was half secret. The Adams-Foster family (Jude's adoptive family) knew about them being together, and were totally fine with it, as Lena had a wife, named Stef, so homosexuality was not entirely new in the family. Adam Stevens, on the other hand, was a total different case. Not only did Connor not dare to tell his dad, scared to be used as a punching bag again, but also, his father had threatened him that if Connor knew any gay kids, and didn't beat them up, Adam would beat him up. Connor, being gay himself, was anxious to tell his dad, as he knew that his father would not support him, and that he would be out on the streets in less than a second after he told it. He knew that if his father would abandon him, that would mean he wouldn't ever have to live with him again, but it would also mean the worst beating of his life, and he would never be prepared for that.

Jude realized the enormous sacrifice that Connor made, just for him, and it made Jude anxious. It made him anxious to see Connor being beaten up every day, with the knowledge that Connor could have escaped it. He thought of Connor as brave. There was no better way to describe it. Connor was brave. Jude had never admired anyone else as much as he admired Connor. Connor had basically said that he'd go through hell to be with Jude, as life in the Stevens' house was hell for Connor. Connor often came over to the Adams-Foster house, and saw them like the family he didn't have at home. Stef and Lena also treated him like a son, even though they knew nothing about his situation at home. Of course, they had their concerns about his bruises, but they could only speculate about them, because they didn't get a clear answer from either Connor or Jude. Connor lied to his father about the Adams-Foster family. Connor had said they are a husband and wife. He knew that if he had said that they were a lesbian couple, he would not be allowed to even be near Jude again.

"You're absolutely sure, aren't you?" Jude asked one more time.  
"Yes," Connor answered, "I'm absolutely sure".  
"Thank you, thank you so much for not letting me leave my new family. I know that you pay a huge price for it, and if I could, I would share it with you. No, I would take it all. I would take all of your dad's beatings," Jude said. Connor kept silent, not knowing what to say. He didn't want Jude to take the beatings, but also, he didn't want to get into that discussion again, as they'd already had it a few times before. Connor stood up and gestured for Jude to do the same. Jude did and they stood opposite of each other. They stood close together, their hands holding each other's. Jude looked Connor directly in the eye, and Connor looked back.

"I love you so much," Connor said, not breaking the eye contact.  
"And I don't love you any less," Jude said, a smile forming on his face.  
"But I can't stand the thought of you leaving your family, so I promise to take anything my father gives me, in order to be with you," Connor said, and Jude could see fear in his eyes while he did.  
"I know you are willing to make that sacrifice, and I know that you want me to be safe, but I want you to be safe too," Jude said, not being able to hold back his tears.  
"I'm not safe, you know that as well as I do. I'll never be safe with my dad around. But that's not holding me back. I love you, Jude Jacob Adams Foster," Connor said, his voice soothing to comfort Jude.  
"I know you do," Jude sobbed.  
Connor kissed Jude on his lips, and as usual, they both lost track of time. Whenever they kissed, it seemed like time stopped and it was just them. They kissed quite often, but every kiss was special in its own way. This kiss was special because it was loving, comforting, fearful and wet all at once.

When they broke it, they looked around to see if anyone had seen them. They were at their school, Anchor Beach, because they couldn't talk about this in either of the two houses, as their parents would overhear them. So they met in secret, in the middle of the night. They'd both snuck out and came here solely to discuss the idea of running away together, and if they would have decided to do so, they'd have done it tonight, so both boys had brought their bags and stuffed it with food and other useful material. It wasn't needed, so they'd both have to put everything back before anybody noticed it was ever gone.

"We should go home," Connor said, and Jude noticed that his voice broke at the word 'home'.  
"Yeah we should, it's 2AM, time to get some sleep because we have to wake up early this morning! You haven't forgotten it, have you?" Jude replied.  
"Of course not, how could I? " Connor said, smirking.  
"Good, I'll see you in a few hours then!"  
"See you in a few hours, Jude!"

Jude watched Connor getting on his bike and riding away into the darkness. He himself leaned against a tree, tears still streaming down his face as he realized just how big a sacrifice his boyfriend was willing to make for him. It made him feel awful, but proud at the same time. Proud of Connor, who managed to keep his scores up at school, even though his situation at home was not the optimal climate for studying, but proud of himself too, for finding someone who believes Jude is worth all this pain. Not only physical pain from the bruises, but the emotional and mental pain from getting abused by the person who should love and protect him. Jude strongly felt that Connor was the one for him. No other boy had ever made such a big decision for Jude, and surely not a decision which protected Jude and put himself in a worse situation for him.

After his tears had stopped flowing and he regained control over his body again, he also walked over to his bike and rode away. He only lived a quarter of an hour riding from his school, so it wouldn't take long before he saw the front porch of the house he called home. All the lights were off, which was in Jude's favour, as he'd have to snuck back in. He parked his bike on his usual spot, where nobody would ever guess it had been gone, and entered the house via the kitchen door. It was quiet in the house, so Jude was aware of every step he took and he made sure that he was as quiet as possible. He put back all the food and material he had taken when he snuck out, and then made his way upstairs, carefully counting steps and skipping the third, ninth and twelfth step, as these were the ones that creaked. He crossed the hallway and entered his room. When he close the door behind him, he heard a sound and he froze. Upon concluding that it was just Jesus making noises in his sleep, Jude took off his shirt and trousers and pulled on his pyjamas. He lied down in bed and almost immediately fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: Chapters 2-7 will be lighter than the introduction was, I hope you'll still like it though, after these 6, it will get a little darker again, bringing some more trouble concerning Adam. I hope you won't hook off, cause I think it's worth the wait!

CHAPTER 2 – ADAMS-FOSTER CAMPING TRIP PT. 1

Jude woke up around 8AM, little less than six hours after he fell asleep. His alarm rang, and he knew he had to get out. He slammed the knob on his alarm which would make his alarm turn off, and groggily stepped out of bed. Downstairs he could hear Stef moving around and yelling "Let's go" to everyone. Jude smirked at his mother's signature phrase. It'd been a hot summer night, so his pyjamas were wet from his sweat, so he peeled them off and walked to the bathroom to throw them in the laundry basket. He then had a shower and walked back into his room and pulled on his clothes. He took a new pair of pyjamas from his wardrobe and put those in his travelling bag. He then lifted his bag and carried it downstairs, where Stef was already packing the cars. Jude placed his bag near the others and went to the kitchen to have breakfast. He was halfway his stash of pancakes when Connor walked into the kitchen. The two shared a look, both exhausted, and Connor sat down. He looked around to see if nobody was there to overhear them, and when he saw that there was nobody, he turned to Jude.

"Are you exhausted too?" He asked.  
"Yeah, I am," Jude replied, while taking another bite of his pancake.  
"Maybe it wasn't a good idea to meet in the middle of the night, just a few hours before we had to go anyway," Connor said, laughing at himself for being so dumb.  
"No, it was a good idea. Now we are on the same page at least. We've made an important decision, and I'm glad we did," Jude said.  
"Yeah, maybe that's true…" Connor said, but he didn't sound convinced.  
Just when Jude was about to point that out, Callie came in, and sat down to have breakfast herself, causing Jude not to say anything about it.

"Hey Connor," Callie said, "excited about the camping trip?"  
"Yeah, I am, I'd love to spend a few days away from California, being with you guys!" Connor said, and Jude smiled.  
"Good, we'll be leaving in about half an hour, so Jude, make sure you take a shower before that time!" Callie said, causing Connor to laugh, as Jude's hair was obviously wet from showering.  
"I already did, so it's okay," Jude said to her, as he watched how Callie ravenously wolfed down her stash of pancakes.  
Jude and Connor went to help Stef pack the cars, and when they were finished, they went upstairs to see if Jude had left any important stuff behind, and indeed, they found Jude's phone charger still on his nightstand, and Jude quickly pocketed it. His mothers were keen on the kids having their phones with them and charged, so that they could get in contact in case something happened. Connor had brought his phone as well and had already given his number to everyone, so that everyone could reach him too.

The time came to go, and the family split up. They had two cars, one car would be driven by Lena and Stef and the other would be driven by Brandon. They made Brandon's car an all-boys car, and Stef and Lena's car an all-girls car. So Jude climbed into Brandon's car together with Connor, Jesus and Brandon, while Stef, Lena, Callie and Mariana climbed into the other car. Jesus sat on the passenger seat and Connor and Jude sat in the back. Brandon and Jesus could see that Jude and Connor both were still tired, but thought that they hadn't slept well last night as they were excited to go. It was Jude's second camping trip with the Adams-Fosters family, but this was his first annual summer camping trip with them. They would spend the next few days in the Dixie National Forest in Utah. They'd spend their time on Duck Creek Campground, but would also go hiking in the woods, and do other activities. It was Connor's second time camping ever, so he was very excited, especially because this time, it wasn't with school. They'd have to drive for about 8 hours, covering 528 miles, which is why they left so early. During the first two hours of the journey, Brandon and Jesus had a conversation, and Jude and Connor just listened to them.

"So you're saying that you broke up with Cathy?" Brandon asked.  
"Yeah, I did, she's heartbroken," Jesus replied.  
"Why did you?" Brandon asked.  
"Because I wanted something new, you know?" Jesus replied.  
"No, I don't know. I never had a relationship with someone and wanted something new, maybe it's part of being faithful to each other." Brandon said.  
"I was faithful!" Jesus defended himself, "I don't know about her, and I hope she was too, but whatever, it's over now, I don't care anymore if she'd been faithful."  
"And how long will it take before you get another girlfriend?" Brandon asked sarcastically.  
At this point, Jude decided to help his brother teasing Jesus.  
"Probably he'll manage to get a girl's number while we're on the road today," he said, sticking out his tongue towards Jesus, causing Connor to laugh.  
"Ha ha, very funny," Jesus said.  
"Or he'll end up with some girl in his tent in the coming days," Jude added.  
"Oh, you better don't!" Brandon exclaimed, as Brandon and Jesus shared a tent.  
"I'm not gonna do anything stupid, alright?" Jesus said, and with this, their conversation ended.

It was silent in the car for the next half hour, and Jude felt Connor's head against his shoulder, breathing deeply, and he realized that Connor had fallen asleep. Jude leaned his head on Connor's and closed his eyes. In no time, Jude also fell asleep.  
Jesus looked in the rear-view mirror and saw his little brother lying with his boyfriend and pointed this out to Brandon.  
"Look how cute they are," he said.  
"Yeah, they probably didn't sleep well, they're so excited to go on their first Adams-Foster annual camping trip." Brandon replied  
"I remember my first time," Jesus said.  
"Yeah, you ran around panicking because you didn't know where you were," Brandon laughed.  
"You'd have done the same! I was only six!" Jesus said.  
"Well, I was only one year older!" Brandon replied.  
"But you had been there before," Jesus thought to have a point.  
"No I hadn't! Your first Adams-Foster camping trip was mine as well. That was the first time we did it, and now we do it each year," Brandon explained.  
"Really? You never done it before we came?" Jesus asked.  
"Nope," Brandon simply replied.  
"Oh… I didn't know that."  
"Well, now you do!" Brandon said, marking the end of this conversation.

When the group had driven for two hours, they had their first stop, as both Lena and Brandon needed to rest for a while before they could drive again. It was 10AM and the cars pulled over at a parking lot at the side of the highway. They took out some snacks and 8 bottles of water (one for each), and walked around a bit, so that they could stretch their legs, as they didn't have a lot of room in the cars, as both cars were stuffed with inflatable mattresses, blankets, pillows and luggage.  
They went to the toilet (the boys found a spot in a near bush, as the line for the toilets was incredibly long), and then they were off again. This time, Jude and Connor felt more awake, and the boys had put together a cd with songs to play during the drive, and they played the CD while singing along to all the songs together:

The name she gave was Caroline  
The daughter of a miner  
And her ways were free, and it seemed to me  
The sunshine walked beside her

She come from Spencer, 'cross the hill  
She said her pa had sent her  
'Cause the coal was low and soon the snow  
Would turn the skies to winter

She said she'd come to look for work  
She was not seeking favors  
For a dime a day and a place to stay  
She'd turn those hands to labor

The times were hard, Lord, the jobs were few  
All through Tecumseh Valley  
But she asked around, and a job she found  
Tending bar for Gypsy Sally

She saved enough to get back home  
When spring replaced the winter  
But her dreams were denied, her pa had died  
The word came down from Spencer

She turned to whorin' out on the streets  
With all the lust inside her  
And many a man returned again  
To lay himself beside her

Well they found her beneath the stairs  
That led to Gypsy Sally's  
In her hand when she died was a note that cried  
Fare thee well, Tecumseh Valley

Jude, Jesus and Brandon sang along to the CD while Connor just listened, not recognizing most of the songs, and the ones he did recognize, he could hardly remember any lyrics, so he just watched Jude singing and he wondered why Jude had never sang to him before, as he could hear that Jude could sing very well. After a few songs, they pulled over again, having another break to rest, during which they ate lunch. The evening before, Stef and Lena had prepared lunch for everyone, including Connor, which they ate now, while they exchanged experiences during the journey so far. Connor told the family about how Brandon, Jesus and Jude were singing along to their CD, and made the remark that he wished Jude sang to him once, causing Jude to get blush, much to the family's pleasure.

After lunch, they got on the road again, and they now chose a CD that Connor knew too, so they were singing along each line with the four of them, creating a surprisingly good harmony between the five voices. They arrived at the campground at 5 o'clock that afternoon, and while the children had to stay in the cars, Stef and Lena went away to check in. Soon they came back, and Lena sat down behind the wheel while Stef walked over to Brandon's car to tell him to follow Lena, after which she sat down on the passenger seat of Lena's car. Their spot was on the other side of the campground, so they had to drive for another ten minutes to get there, and actually find the spot, but they found that they had a spot on a separate field, just big enough for four tents, so they would have silence and they approved of that. The kids could do whatever they wanted without disturbing other campers, while Stef and Lena could silently read their books and tan in the sun. This was going to be a great camping trip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask.  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The song that plays in the car is "Tecumseh Valley" by Townes Van Zandt.  
> The next chapter is called "Adams-Foster Camping Trip pt. 2".


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.

CHAPTER 3 – ADAMS-FOSTER CAMPING TRIP PT. 2

"No, Connor, first we got to get the frame right before we can put the pegs in the ground!" Jude laughed.  
Connor, having little experience with camping, laid down the pegs and apologized to Jude.  
"I'm sorry, I just don't know anything, well, I only know that the pegs need to go in the ground so that the tent won't be blown away by the wind," Connor said.  
"It's okay, but please help me with this. Hold this bar, while I connect it to this one," Jude said, and Connor followed his command. In no time, the tent was ready, and Jude laughed as he handed Connor the pegs again.  
"Now you can smash these in the ground," he said.  
"Dork," Connor giggled as he smashed the first peg in the ground.  
In less than a minute, all the pegs were in the ground, and Jude and Connor went to help Callie and Mariana, who found it a little more difficult to set up the tent. With Jude's help, they got it quite quickly as well, although they didn't listen to Jude as well as Connor did, causing the tent to collapse once because Mariana hadn't connected two poles firm enough.  
Jude and Connor then went to the cars and opened the trunk, taking out the luggage they'd brought and they set it up in one big pile in the middle. Everyone took what was theirs and put it in their tents. The tents were big enough for three people with luggage, so they had lots of room in the tents. Brandon and Jesus set up their beds on the opposite sides of the tent, with a big gap in between them where they'd put all their luggage. Connor and Jude had arranged their tent a little differently. They'd put the mattresses together in the middle, tying them together to make sure they wouldn't move during the night, and put their luggage on their own side of the improvised double bed. They would sleep together this trip. They unpacked their bags and took two blankets from the pile. They tied the blankets together, making it one big one, big enough to cover them both. They didn't want to sleep under different blankets, as this created a divide between them that they had tried to minimalize by putting the bed together. They both took a pillow and their tent was done.

Jude and Connor got out of their tent and said that they were going to explore the campground. Stef and Lena were sitting on their folding chairs outside their tent, reading their books. Lena looked up and said that it was alright, as long as they'd be back by half past six for dinner. It was a quarter to five, so they had forty-five minutes, which was enough, according to Mariana, who came with them. Mariana had been here before 10 times. They went to this exact campsite each year, and the first time they went, Mariana and Jesus had been six. Now they were sixteen and they knew the campground by heart. Mariana showed them around, and made sure that Jude and Connor knew the highlights of the campground. The little store where they could buy souvenirs, the lake where they could swim, the snack bar where they could get ice cream and other snacks if they got hungry. Mariana even showed them the playground.  
"Why would we want to know where the playground is?" Jude asked her.  
"Oh, you know, to play around," Mariana said.  
"We're not kids anymore," Jude said, but if he really looked deep within himself, that slide looked really attractive.

They went to their tents again when the tour was over, just in time for dinner. Because Stef and Lena hadn't gone to the supermarket yet to buy food, they took the sausages and buns that they had brought, made a campfire and roasted the sausages on sticks and ate them as hotdogs. Apparently, this was a tradition on the first evening of the Adams-Foster annual camping trip, as everybody reminisced about past years and their first meal on the trip. Nobody spoke a word yet about what they'd do the rest of the evening, as this needed to be a surprise for Jude, Callie and Connor. They ate several hotdogs per person, and when they were finished, Lena joked that Connor and Jude would have to do the dishes, which the boys knew was a joke, as there were no dishes to be done. They had cooked with sticks and nobody had used a plate or cutlery. But Jude and Connor both took the empty trays where the sausages once were and brought these to the trashcans.

When they returned, Stef said that everybody needed to take their coats with them, and so they did. When everybody had gathered again, Stef and Lena gestured for the rest to follow them, and so they did. Brandon, Jesus and Mariana already knew what they were going to do, but Callie, Jude and Connor didn't yet. They were a bit nervous, but they knew that they weren't going to do anything dangerous, as Mariana would not have agreed to do anything dangerous, and she'd been doing this for ten years now. They walked off the campgrounds and into the forest, which at this time was still lighted by the sun. Jude and Connor were awestruck by how beautiful the nature looked here and had hardly looked where they were going because they were looking around all the time. Jude once stopped to study a butterfly up close, but when he stopped walking, Callie bumped into him from behind. Both of them laughed and they continued following Stef and Lena.  
"How long will we walk?" Connor asked Stef.  
"That depends on how fast we walk," Stef replied, winking at Connor.  
"How long does it normally take?" Connor asked.  
"Usually around an hour," Lena replied, to which Mariana sighed. She never liked walking for so long, but whenever they were on this camping trip, Stef and Lena made her.  
"Connor, keep looking around, it's beautiful," Jude said.  
"Oh, and if you're at it, look out for bears, we're counting on you!" Jesus said.  
Connor, surprised by this remark, kept looking around, trying not to miss anything in fear of seeing a bear, which made the whole family laugh.  
"Connor, sweetie, there are no bears here, Jesus is kidding," Stef tranquillized Connor.

An hour later, when the sun was about to set, they arrived at the foot of a hill. Stef and Lena started climbing the hill and the children followed. The occasional sigh from Mariana and Callie broke the silence, but other than that, it was completely silent. The top of the hill was bare. There were no trees, only short grass, and everybody was overwhelmed and dazed by the gorgeous view they had. The horizon was far away and everything they could see was beautiful. There were in the middle of the Dixie National Forest now, and everywhere they looked, they were surrounded by trees and tiny villages that looked even smaller from above. Jude, Connor and Callie had never seen anything like it and especially they were astounded by how beautiful it was here. The others, having seen it before, were still overwhelmed. Brandon and Jesus were whispering to each other about how much they'd missed that view. Especially the setting sun made quite an impression over the kids. It made everything so much more beautiful.

Stef sat down in the grass, and Lena sat down next to her. The kids completed the circle as Stef started pouring drinks for them. It was warm and everybody was sweaty, so a cold drink was welcome. They drank in silence and when they finished, they still said nothing. For the first time since Stef and Lena had adopted Jude and Callie, Jude felt connected to everybody. Before this, Jude had always been aware that he was adopted, but now, he felt like he had known everybody his whole lifetime, and he couldn't feel closer to everyone. Mariana turned around so that her back was turned to the others and lied down. The others followed her example and soon, everybody was lying in the grass, their heads close together and they stared to the red sky above them. Overwhelmed by the whole experience, Jude grabbed Connor's hand and looked at him. Connor saw nothing but love in Jude's eyes, and Jude saw nothing but love in Connor's. They smiled at each other, glad that they were able to share this experience. This maybe was the most romantic thing they'd ever done together, as they usually couldn't do romantic things with each other, as Connor's dad couldn't know about them.

"Moms, I love it here," Jude said, and Stef and Lena both smiled, although Jude couldn't see it.  
"I'm glad you do, honey, we come here every first evening, to celebrate our family," Lena answered.  
"Because we are glad that we've come together the way we did," Stef added.  
"I love it here too, it's so beautiful," Connor said.  
"You're welcome to join us next year, Connor," Lena said.  
"Thank you, I'd love to," Connor replied, blushing.  
"Remember the first time we got here?" Mariana asked nobody in particular.  
"Yeah, back when both of us had to carry you and Jesus up the hill because you were too tired to walk up, and we had to carry you all the way down and back to the campground because you had fallen asleep," Stef remembered.  
"I loved this place immediately, and I hoped to see it again one day," Mariana reminisced.  
"Well, your hopes were fulfilled, weren't they? This is your tenth time here," Brandon said.  
"Yeah, and it feels like we're absolutely complete now, with Jude and Callie here too," Mariana said.  
Jude was surprised by this comment, but couldn't help but be flattered about how sisterly Mariana was.

Connor lied with his eyes still staring at the sky that slowly turned darker and darker. When the sky was fully black and they could see thousands of stars above them, Connor pointed up.  
"Look, Jude. You see that bright star over there?" He said, and when Jude said he did, Connor added: "that's Polaris. It is the star that marks where North is. It's a way to navigate at night."  
"How do you know that?" Jude asked.  
"Because I pay attention in science class," Connor joked and the whole family laughed. Connor quickly added that it was a joke and he knew it because he used to go watch stars with his mother, because Jude (who was one of the best students in that class) didn't like the joke.

The family lied on top of that hill until after midnight, when Stef stood up, checked her watch and was astonished to find that it was past twelve, and they still had to walk an hour. Everybody was tired, Brandon especially, because he'd driven all the way here, whereas Stef and Lena had taken turns driving, so they walked somewhat slower. They arrived at the tents at half past two, and went in their tents to grab their toothbrushes. They went to the bathrooms and brushed their teeth. Jude and Connor were done before the others, so they said goodnight to everybody and walked back to their tents. When they were just outside the bathrooms, Connor took Jude's hand and they walked back to their tents holding hands.

"Today was the first great day in a long time for me. Thank you," Connor whispered, not wanting to wake up other campers.  
"I loved it too, and thank you too," Jude agreed.  
When they reached the tents, Connor took his pyjamas and wanted to walk back to the bathrooms to change, but Jude asked him not to.  
"Connor, please don't. Please don't leave me alone here," he said.  
"I got to change…" Connor said.  
"You can do that here, I don't care. I've seen you change at school before PE, it's not a big deal," Jude said.  
Connor agreed with that, and he only wanted to change elsewhere to make sure Jude was comfortable, but Jude seemed comfortable changing with him around and so the two changed together. They lied down in their improvised double bed, and turned to their sides, Connor spooning Jude. They always lied like this when they were together, because this felt best for both. Jude loved to be held, and Connor loved to hold Jude. Connor liked to be held too, but most of the time, he liked to hold Jude more than to be held himself.

Jude turned around to face Connor, and their noses touched.  
"I love you, Connor," he said, and Connor could feel Jude's breath on his face.  
"I love you too, Jude," Connor replied and Jude could smell Connor's fresh breath.  
They moved a little so that their bodies were touching each other, and they cuddled for some time, until Connor said he really needed to sleep, so he leaned in to kiss Jude, after which Jude turned around again so that Connor could spoon him again, which Connor did, and the two fell asleep like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask.  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Adams-Foster Camping Trip pt. 3".


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.

CHAPTER 4 – ADAMS-FOSTER CAMPING TRIP PT. 3

"Wake up, let's go, let's go, let's go!" Stef shouted, waking up Jude and Connor. First, they didn't know where they were, but soon, they remembered where they were. They got up groggily, and zipped open the tent. They saw that Stef, Lena, Brandon and Jesus were already up and preparing breakfast, and Mariana and Callie had, just like them, just stuck their sleepy heads out of their tent to see what was going on. Stef said that everybody had to be out of their tents and ready for breakfast in 5 minutes, so Jude and Connor lied back for two more minutes.

"Do we really have to get up?" Connor asked.  
"I'm afraid so," Jude responded.  
"Hmmm, I'd much rather stay here and cuddle with you," Connor said.  
"Me too, I could do this all day long," Jude said.  
"Challenge accepted," Connor said, laughing.  
"Come on, we have to get ready," Jude said.  
Connor pouted, and Jude kissed him, much to Connor's approval. Connor kissed him back, and they changed their clothes again, taking fresh clothes from their bags and putting those on. When they zipped open their tent, Stef was just walking towards them.  
"Ah, I was just going to drag you out of that tent," she said playfully.  
"No need for that, mom," Jude said, laughing.  
They asked if they could help with breakfast, and Lena said that the only thing left to do was to eat it, so Jude and Connor sat down at the table, waiting for the rest to come. Mariana and Callie did need to be dragged out of their tents, which Stef blissfully did. They sat down opposite of Jude and Connor, who were laughing about what had just happened.

Breakfast consisted of fresh bread (Lena had gone to the local bakery), scrambled eggs with bacon, two leftover sausages from the evening before, milk and orange juice. When everybody was done eating, they all cooperated doing the dishes, and everybody went to the bathrooms to take a shower and brush their teeth. Jude and Connor, fast as they always were, were done the first and so they walked back to their tents again. They held hands again, which got some stares from neighbouring campers, but nobody said anything about it. Jude felt free to show the world his love for Connor, and Connor was happy to finally be himself in public. Even on school, he wasn't out, afraid that somebody would tell his father, but here 528 miles from home, nobody could hurt him.

They got into their tent again, and put away their toothbrushes, towels, soaps and shampoos. They sat down opposite of each other and their hands were folded into one big ball of hands.  
"I wish I could be myself more often," Connor began.  
"Me too, it feels so good to hold your hand in public," Jude agreed, "But I understand why you don't want it back home".  
"Thanks, I just hope that one day, I can be myself at home. No, we could be ourselves, because I feel like I'm holding you back from being yourself, which I'm really sorry for," Connor said.  
"Don't be, it's okay. If you don't feel safe doing it, I'm willing to wait. I want you to feel safe," Jude reassured Connor.  
"Thank you," Connor ended the conversation.  
Jude leaned forward and laid his head on Connor's shoulder, his face touching Connor's neck. He loved sitting like this, smelling Connor and feeling so intimate with him. Connor softly kissed Jude's hair, before he lied back, gesturing for Jude to come lie next to him. This time, Jude spooned Connor, as Connor wanted to be held for a while. Connor enjoyed being held by someone he truly loved, because it gave him everything his father didn't. Jude gave him love, which Connor had almost forgotten about since his parents had divorced and his father had gotten custody over him. Jude felt at ease holding Connor, and felt asleep again.

He was woken by the sound of the rest coming back from the bathrooms, and he and Connor got out of their tent, curious to know what they'd do today. Stef said that she'd announce that in a minute, but she first had to finish getting ready for the day, as she was still walking around in her pyjamas. They sat down at the table, watching the others getting ready. It was an amusing sight, they thought, as Mariana and Callie were bickering about who would wear a certain shirt (it was Callie's shirt, but they basically shared their wardrobe), Brandon and Jesus were bickering over who would change clothes where, in the tent or at the bathrooms, and Stef and Lena were minding their own business and let the children fight out their problems. They watched in amusement as Brandon eventually took his clothes and decided to be 'the more mature person' and walked towards the bathrooms, as Jesus victoriously zipped the tent shut to get some privacy. Callie eventually won their fight about who should wear what, as Stef had enough of the fight an gave the final decision ("It is Callie's shirt, so if she wants to wear it, you can't").

When Brandon was back, Stef took a stand on a rock that was lying around and called everybody to stand near her. When everybody was there, she explained what the program for that day would be.  
"Mama and I have arranged 4 canoes for today. We will take those canoes downstream and we will have to row our way up until we're here, at the lake. There we will get out of the canoe at the pier."  
"So we have to row up against the current?" Mariana asked.  
"That's right, young lady," Stef replied with a wink.  
"But isn't that hard?" Callie asked.  
"It is, but it's a good training for your muscles," Stef said, flexing her muscles to demonstrate.  
"Is there a prize?" Jesus asked.  
"Oh there surely is," Lena answered.  
"What is it?" Brandon asked.  
"It's a Mama Sandwich!" Stef said enthusiastically.  
"What is a Mama Sandwich?" Connor whispered in Jude's ear.  
"It's a thing they do when one of us is upset, afraid or doesn't feel good. It's basically you in the middle and our moms hugging you, one from the front and one from the back." Jude explained.  
Connor, who never got any love or hugs at home was determined to win.  
"We'll win this thing!" Connor whispered.  
"The person in your team is the person you share a tent with!" Lena continued the explanation. Jude looked at Connor and saw Connor's muscular arms.  
"We will win this thing, especially with your strong arms," Jude whispered, making Connor giggle and blush.

The group went to the boat rental and after a little conversation between Stef and the salesman, they took four canoes and let them float on the water. They got in their canoes, and rowed the boats downstream. Jude sat behind Connor, as Jude was the tallest of the two, whereas Connor was the strongest of the two, so he sat in the front, so he could steer the boat in case it needed to make a quick turn. After an hour, Stef and Lena, who were the first boat in line steered towards the bank and the others followed their example. Stef stepped out of the boat so that everybody could see her well, and explained one last rule.  
"Everybody must stay behind me and mama. We will be the first to arrive. As we can't get a mama sandwich, we are out of the game, and we need to see who won to award the prize." Having said that, she threw six bottles of water at each boat, three for each person in the boats. "This will be sufficient water. Now, as soon as I'm back in our boat, mama and I will row away. You guys will wait ten minutes and follow us then." She climbed back in her boat and Stef and Lena rowed away.

"Are we really going to wait?" Connor whispered to Jude.  
"Yes, we are. I know you want to win, but we have to play it by the rules." Jude replied.  
"Alright, that's true," Connor admitted.  
While they waited, they had a conversation with the other four.  
"Pretty funny that a mama sandwich began as a way to cheer us up, but is now used as a prize," Mariana said.  
"Well, I think you can safely say that a mama sandwich is not the real prize," Brandon said, laughing.  
"Why not?" Connor asked.  
"Because our mums like to hug us as much as possible, so if one group will get a mama sandwich, so will the others. I guarantee that," Callie responded.  
Connor, relieved that he didn't have to race to get a loving hug, felt more at ease.  
"Hey, I know that we'll get a mama sandwich anyway, but we're gonna try to win, aren't we?" He asked Jude.  
"Oh yes, we are gonna try to win. In fact, we are gonna win, especially with your muscles," Jude said again, squeezing Connor's biceps. Connor liked that Jude liked his body. It made him a little more secure.

When ten minutes had passed, and everyone was ready to go, Brandon counted down.  
"Three, Two, One, GO," he shouted. At go, every canoe came in motion and the children paddled as fast as they could. Connor paddled the fastest and the strongest, so soon, he and Jude were far in front of the others. Jesus, who had about the same amount of muscles in his arms, wasn't as determined to win as Connor. He'd had a lot of mama sandwiches already he didn't care for winning. Callie and Mariana hardly came forward, even though they did their best, so eventually they decided to give up on rowing and moved forward by placing the oars in the water so that they reached the ground and pushing the boat forwards.  
It took the boys an hour and a half to reach the spot where Stef and Lena were already waiting. Upon seeing the two youngest boys, they shrieked in surprise that these two had won from the others. Ten minutes after the boys went ashore, Mariana and Callie were in sight, followed by Brandon and Jesus. Mariana and Callie were still using their technique of pushing the boat forwards, so when they came ashore and Brandon and Jesus were in a reasonable distance, they began their complaints.  
"They cheated! They didn't even row all this way, they just pushed off!" Brandon shouted.  
"We didn't say anything about having to row all the way, just about staying in your boat!" Lena shouted back.

When the boys had come ashore and accepted their defeat, Lena announced that Jude and Connor were the winners. Stef stood behind Connor and Lena stood behind Jude as they performed their mama sandwich. Jude and Connor were facing each other and had laid their heads on each other's shoulders. Jude held Connor and Stef, while Connor held Jude and Lena. For Connor, it was the best moment in a long time. He was in the middle of a hug, a loving hug, with his boyfriend and his two mothers. Nothing could make him feel bad today. After a few minutes, the mama sandwich was broken off, and Stef spoke again.  
"The other teams have also performed very well, so they earn a mama sandwich as well!" Stef said, after which she and Lena first gave Mariana and Callie a mama sandwich, and then Brandon and Jesus. When they were done, Brandon shot Connor a look, which Connor interpreted as a look that said 'I told you this wasn't the real prize'.  
"Well, the winners also get…" Lena began, then paused to create a dramatic effect.  
"One huge sack of candy each!" Stef shouted enthusiastically, grabbing two enormous sacks of candy and handing these to both Jude and Connor. The boys looked amazed by how big these sacks of candy were, before Jude opened his and let everyone grab a few pieces of candy.  
"Shall we share everything?" Connor whispered.  
"I'd like that," Jude replied, smiling at his boyfriend, then giving him a quick peck on his cheek.  
"Then I won't open mine, and we'll eat yours first, now yours is already opened," Connor said, and Jude agreed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think using my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask.  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Adams-Foster Camping Trip pt. 4".


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.

CHAPTER 5 – ADAMS-FOSTER CAMPING TRIP PT. 4

The rest of the day the children were free to do whatever they wanted. Brandon, Jesus, Mariana and Callie decided to play a game of beach volleyball, while Jude and Connor decided to take a walk through the woods. Stef and Lena had warned them to stay on the paths at all times, and not to stray off too far, as they were concerned about them. Jude and Connor promised to stay on the paths and said they were going to follow a route marked by blue signs. This route started and ended on the same point, not too far from their tents, and Stef and Lena were assured and allowed the boys to go.  
"Take one of your bags of candy with you, so you can drop a candy every few meters. Like Hansel and Gretel did with breadcrums!" Stef had joked.

They started their walk and soon found themselves in the middle of the woods, surrounded by nothing but trees and animals. They felt completely free and they felt like they could do anything without being judged by anyone or anything. Connor grabbed Jude's hand, looking towards his boyfriend and smiled. Jude smiled back. He loved not needing words to communicate with Connor. Their actions, gestures and looks said enough about how they felt about each other, but sometimes, Jude still had the feeling that he should say that he loved Connor. Each time he said it, he'd feel all warm and in love. It was crazy how much these three words could do to him.  
"I love you, Connor," Jude said, looking over at his boyfriend.  
Connor looked him right in the eyes and Jude could see that Connor was happy to hear this from him.  
"I love you too, Jude," he replied, the twinkle in his eye glowing brighter, while Jude's twinkle was the brightest it had ever been. They continued walking, both not saying a word, but both not feeling like they had to. They both thought that their intertwined hands said enough.

They walked silently for a while, until they came at a crossroad where there was no blue sign to be seen.  
"No sign means straight ahead, I suppose?" Jude asked.  
"I suppose it means gay ahead," Connor replied, smirking about his own pun.  
Jude, who didn't get the joke at first, but realized it after a few seconds ran his hand through Connor's hair while laughing. Jude realized that all of their other male friends would playfully punch each other's shoulders if something like this would happen, but he didn't think Connor would appreciate it, as it would probably remind Connor of his situation at home, while the whole reason he was invited to this camping trip was to get him away from that for a little while and find some distraction. Also it made time for the bruises to heal, and Jude couldn't help but notice that Connor was even more breathtakingly beautiful with less bruises. Jude hoped to one day see him fully recovered from every bruise on his entire body, to see how he'd look. He had only seen Connor with bruises so far, and had grown accustomed to seeing Connor covered in bruises, but that didn't mean that Jude liked them. Jude didn't like them at all, as it reminded him of how is boyfriend was treated at home, by his father.

They chose to take the path straight ahead of them, and soon they saw a new blue sign, which reassured them that they were indeed on the right track. They walked hand in hand, not saying anything until they reached a bench at the side of the road.  
"Could we sit here for just a minute?" Connor asked.  
"Sure," Jude said, "There's a beautiful view here, so I don't mind".  
"But I got the best view of all," Connor said, smiling to Jude.  
"Oh stop it," Jude said, blushing.  
They sat down and locked hands again. Connor laid his head on Jude's shoulder, feeling at ease. Jude kissed Connor's head and ran his fingers through Connor's hair. Just when he wanted to stroke Connor's cheek, Connor sat up and faced Jude. He leaned in and kissed Jude on his cheek.  
"Forever?" He asked.  
"I hope so," Jude responded. Then Jude, remembering Connor's earlier words, began to sing.

"Music is playing in the darkness  
And a lantern goes swinging by  
Shadows flickering, my heart's jittering  
Just you and I

Not tonight, come tomorrow  
When everything's sunny and bright.  
No no no, come tomorrow  
Cause then we'll be waiting for the moonlight

We'll go walking in the moonlight  
Walking in the moonlight

Laughter ringing in the darkness  
People drinking for days gone by  
Time don't mean a thing when you're by my side  
Please stay a while

You know I never could foresee the future years  
You know I never could see where life was leading me  
But will we be together for ever  
What will be my love, can't you see that I just don't know

No no not tonight, come tomorrow  
Everything is gonna be alright  
Wait and see if tomorrow  
We'll be as happy as we feel tonight.

We'll go walking in the moonlight  
Walking in the moonlight

I can hear the music in the darkness  
Floating softly to where we lie  
No more questions now, let's enjoy tonight  
Just you and I  
Just you and…  
I

Can't you see that we've gotta be together  
Be together just you and I,"

Jude sang, and Connor felt happier than ever. He loved to hear Jude sing, especially because this was the first song that Jude sang to him, and it was a sweet song. He kissed Jude on his lips and thanked him for the song. Jude, flattered by Connor's words of praise about him, reddened, which made Connor feel in love even more. They sat on the bench for half an hour, until Jude said they'd should get going again, as it was close to four o'clock, and they still had to walk a while. So they walked on, talking about how beautiful nature was here and how glad they were to be out of California. When they reached the end, they kissed one more time before they headed to the tents, where they were greeted by the others. The Jude's siblings had grown bored of playing volleyball, so they were sitting on their folding chairs, playing cards. When they asked if Jude and Connor would join them, Stef said that they were going to have dinner. The kids went into their own tents to get themselves ready and within five minutes, everybody was ready to go to the restaurant. They went by car as it was too far to walk. The restaurant was in a town not far from the edge of the forest, so it wasn't that far a drive. When they arrived at the restaurant, Lena talked to the waiter and he led them to their table, and asked them if they wanted a drink. They all gave their order and the waiter left, leaving the menus. They all picked what they wanted, and as the waiter returned with their drinks, they gave their orders and awaited their food while talking. After about fifteen minutes, their starters arrived and they all ate silently. Jude had a salad, while Connor had mushrooms in garlic sauce. Callie was finished with her soup first, and was the first to speak again.

"So Jude, and Connor, how was your walk through the woods today?" She asked.  
"It was good, the nature is beautiful," Jude responded.  
"Great, because Brandon and I were contemplating doing it tomorrow," Callie announced.  
"One piece of advice, if you don't see signs, go gay ahead," Connor said, and the he and Jude giggled.  
"Sorry, I don't get the joke," Callie said, her tone slightly irritated.  
"It's a joke Connor made, I asked if we should go straight ahead, he answered that we should go gay ahead," Jude explained and now everybody laughed.  
"But wait... You got lost?" Lena asked, changing her tone somewhat worried.  
"We didn't, because we went gay ahead," Jude said and everybody laughed again.

When the main course came, the conversation was broken off again as everybody started eating. By now, everyone was hungry, so they ate like wolves. Jude attacked his steak, while Connor enjoyed his ribs. They got a new round of drinks and when they were done eating and drinking, they left the restaurant after Stef had paid. They drove back to the campground where Jude and Connor lied down for a while, their feet hurting from today's labour. Jude had his arms around Connor and they were staring at the top of the tent. Connor rested his head on Jude's chest and made a soft sound of contentment and approval. After a little while, they heard Mariana's voice coming from outside the tent.

"Jude? Connor? Will you join us playing beach volleyball? If you two come, we'll play four against four!" She asked.  
Connor looked at Jude and from his expression he could figure that Jude wouldn't mind, so they both got up and climbed out of the tent.  
"Sure, we'll play," Connor said.  
"Great," Mariana said.

They walked over to the field, where Callie, Brandon, Jesus stood on one side and Lena and Stef were on the other side. Connor and Jude joined the mothers, while Mariana walked around to join her siblings. Brandon served, and thus the game began. Lena passed the ball to Jude, who set gave Connor a set, and Connor smashed the ball over the net. Brandon and his team was taken aback by the strength with which Connor had smashed the ball, while Lena, Stef and Jude hugged Connor and celebrated their first point. Stef served and Mariana passed the ball to Callie. Callie passed it to Jesus, who tried to smash the ball, like Connor did, but Connor blocked the ball, making it stay on the other half of the field. Callie was quick to get to the ball and passed it upwards and Brandon took it, setting for Jesus, who smashed it over the net, right into Stef's arms, who passed it to Lena. Lena set the ball for Jude, and Jude passed the ball over the net. Callie took the ball and passed it to Jesus, who set it for Brandon. Brandon smashed, but again, Connor was quick to block the ball. This time, the ball hit the ground before anyone could get to it, so Jude's team had another point.

When they finally stopped playing, the score was 51-20, and Jude, Connor, Stef and Lena had won.  
"Seriously, is there anything you aren't good at?" Brandon joked.  
"Boxing," Connor said, and only Jude got the reference Connor was making. Connor was referencing to his father. Jude looked a little concerned, but as the others went on, he decided not to make a great deal out of it.  
"Well, either way we are so proud of you," Lena said.  
Connor started blushing. He wasn't used to anyone saying that to him.  
"Thank you," he said.

Jude said he was tired, and it was eleven o'clock, so nobody looked surprised. He and Connor went to the bathrooms to brush their teeth and get ready for bed. As they walked back, Connor said being tired made him feel cold, so Jude wrapped his arm around him, knowing that it didn't really help, but he was trying. Jude kissed his moms goodnight and the two went into their tent. They changed, and when they were finished, Connor lied down first, and Jude lied down with his head on Connor's bare chest. It was a hot evening, so Connor had neglected to put on his shirt, which Jude didn't mind.  
"Could we stay here forever?" Connor asked Jude.  
"I'd like to," Jude said, while Connor wrapped one arm around Jude.  
"I don't want to go home," Connor said, sighing.  
Jude, not knowing how to respond, felt uneasy.  
"I know," was the best he could come up with.  
"The bruises have just about healed, and in another couple of days, there'll be new ones," Connor said.  
"I wish I could do anything to help you…" Jude said.  
"I know you do, sweetie," Connor said.  
"I love you," Jude said.  
"I love you too," Connor replied.  
Connor saw Jude slowly falling asleep and soon, he felt the first drop of drool on his chest. Connor didn't mind, he was comfortable. As for the drool, Connor didn't mind his boyfriends saliva on his chest, it felt like a connection rather than a turnoff to Connor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask.  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The song Jude sings for Connor is "You and I" by Queen.  
> The next chapter is called "Adams-Foster Camping Trip pt. 5" and it will be the last chapter about the camping trip.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.

CHAPTER 6 – ADAMS-FOSTER CAMPING TRIP PT. 5

It was the last day of the camping trip, and Jude and Connor were woken up early.  
"C'mon, let's go," Stef called out, to her children and Connor. They wanted to leave early, but the tents needed to be taken down, so they had to wake up even earlier. When Jude stuck his head out of the tent and said that he was still tired, Stef walked up to him, picked him up and started running with him in her arms. Jude, who wasn't ready for this, was shocked. Connor, protective of his boyfriend, ran after Stef to get Jude back. Stef ran towards the lake, which gave Connor a slight hint of what was about to happen. Jude, who wasn't awake enough yet to see what was going on, didn't see where they were headed, and figured that Stef thought the fresh air might wake him up. Stef ran up to the pier, and at the end of the pier, she jumped into the water, fully clothed, warning Jude just in time to take a big gulp of air. Connor ran up to the end of the pier and saw a soaking wet Jude in the water, accompanied by his mother.

"Are you awake now?" Stef asked, laughing and out of breath.  
"I guess," Jude replied, still in shock, but as he recovered, he started laughing too. This is so typically Stef, he thought.  
"You look cute, soaking wet," Connor said, but just as he had finished that sentence, he felt two hands on his back and fell into the water head first. Jude couldn't stop laughing, as he saw Mariana standing on the pier, with a grin ever so big on her face. She had won from the strongest boy on this camping trip, and it felt good. When Connor came back up above the water, and he saw who had pushed him in, he got ashore, trapping Mariana on the pier, and ran towards her. Mariana, who had nowhere to go, saw Connor running towards her, and at the last moment, Connor grabbed Mariana and took the jump. Mariana, who had just dressed herself and applied her makeup, hadn't thought of this, and it turned out that her mascara was not waterproof. As soon as her head appeared above the water, her cheeks were black, and there was a clear trail from her eyes to the big black stain on her cheek.

"Alright, you got your payback, but did you really have to make me look like a clown?" She said, laughing.  
"Well yeah, of course," Connor joked.

Lena, Callie, Brandon and Jesus also came around, curious to where the others were, and as soon as they saw everyone in the water, the children trapped Lena on the pier. They formed a line so that Lena couldn't escape, but when Lena told them to stop, they did. Upon hearing this, Stef climbed out of the water so that he stood on the end of the pier, walking up behind Lena, hugging her, so that Lena got wet anyway, and then she dragged her to the end of the pier, where she gave Lena a little time to get a big gulp of air before she pushed her in. Brandon then threw Callie in, who got caught up at looking how Lena was pushed into the water, and so was not paying attention to what else was happening around them. Everyone was in the water now, except Brandon and Jesus, who started wrestling to get each other in. Jesus, who was an experienced wrestler, had Brandon pinned down on the pier in no time, and shoved him towards the edge.  
"Take a breath," Jesus said, smiling victoriously. As Brandon did, Jesus told him that he was a good boy before he shoved him into the water, after which he jumped in himself. Lena, curious to know what happened between Stef and Jude asked Stef about it.  
"Oh it was funny, cause Jude was like paralyzed in my arms while I ran, and Connor came running after me. He almost caught up with me, so I started running faster and faster and I didn't know where to go, until I thought of the pier, which, in hindsight didn't make much sense because, with Connor behind me, there was no going back. So just before we reached the end of the pier, I told Jude to get some air, which he did, and I jumped in, Jude still in my arms," Stef explained, and Lena laughed about it.  
"What about Connor?" Callie asked, "There is no way anyone could throw him in!"  
"Oh there is a way," Mariana said, with a mischievous smile on her face.  
"It's not fair! I wasn't paying attention!" Connor protested.  
"Too bad, dork," Jude teased him. Connor turned towards Jude as he said those words.  
"So you're plotted against me now?" He asked.  
"Of course, I am," Jude said, softly kissing Connor on his lips.  
"Alright, that's enough, lovebirds," Stef said. She had already climbed out of the water, and the rest had followed her example. Jude only now realized that they were the only ones left in the water and they quickly got out.

"Alright, now everybody first take a shower," Stef said, "I don't want any foul-smelling people in my car!"  
So everybody went to take a shower, which they had to do in two groups, as there weren't enough showers for everyone. They took turns, but they made sure that Stef and Lena were in the first group, so that they could prepare breakfast. So when Jude and Connor walked back to their tents, the smell of scrambled eggs and bacon filled their noses. Next to him, Jude could hear Connor's stomach growl, and he realized that he was hungry himself too. They sat down at the table, and waited for everyone to arrive, as Brandon and Jesus were busy in their tents, packing their bags, and Mariana and Callie hadn't finished in the shower yet. Jude and Connor, who had kept most of their belongings in their bags, didn't have anything but their inflatable mattresses and blankets to pack, so they stood up and deflated their mattresses and folded their blankets, put them in the car, together with their bags and sat down at the table again.  
"Mariana and Callie are taking long," Jude commented.  
"Yeah, their girls," Connor said, which was not a good move, with two feminists around.  
"Hey, not all women are slow in the bathroom, that's so stereotypical," Lena said, quasi-offended.  
"Indeed, not all women, I for example…," Stef joked, as she stuck out her tongue to Lena, who laughed.

When Mariana and Callie finally arrived, the eggs were almost cold and the bacon almost devoured by the two young boys, and Jesus complained about it.  
"Why isn't there much bacon?" he asked.  
"Jude and Connor had some," Stef responded.  
"What? And they left so little for the rest?" Jesus asked.  
"Well, the rest was slow, and they were done and hungry," Lena said in defence of the boys.  
"Well, maybe they need to learn to share," Jesus snapped.  
"Hey! If there is anyone who always shares, it's Jude. If there is anyone who always proposes to help anyone, it's Jude," Callie shot at Jesus, defending her little brother. Jude thought it was sweet that even now that they'd been adopted, Callie still took so much care of Jude, defending him from harm, although she sometimes went too far, and treated him like a small child. Jesus, taken aback by Callie's words didn't reply, and just ate the three strips of bacon he had gotten.

After breakfast, everybody went and cleared their tents from their belongings, and put them in the cars. As Jude and Connor had already done this, they began breaking of the tent, reversing the order in which they had put it together.  
"Now you can start with the pegs," Jude said, teasing his boyfriend.  
"Haha," Connor said sarcastically, as he pulled out the first peg.  
With Jude's directions, they broke off their tent and put it in Brandon's car, after which they took the volleyball and started passing it on to each other. They had reached three hundred when the others were finished with their tents and so they had to stop, put the ball in the trunk of Stef and Lena's car and get into the car. This time, Jude and Connor were in Stef and Lena's car, whereas the others were in Brandon's car.

"So Connor, you had fun this week?" Lena asked.  
"Yes, I had, thank you again for inviting me," Connor said politely.  
"We loved having you, you're not a hard kid to handle. You listen well, you never interrupt and you never do anything you shouldn't do, something we can't always say about our own kids," Stef added, winking in the rear-view mirror, so that Connor could see it.  
"Thank you," he said, flattered by these comments.  
"How does your father raise you to be so polite?" Lena asked jokingly.  
"I guess he just got a firm hand and believes that if you raise a child good, the child will be good hearted," Connor said, but his eyes said something else, something only Jude could see. Jude saw that Connor had meant to say that he didn't want to be like his father.  
"Maybe we got to do that too, have a firm hand," Stef said, and although she didn't know what was going on with Connor at home, Jude shot a look at Connor and saw that Connor was upset, because he was afraid that Stef meant the same kind of firm hand that his father used. Jude took Connor's hand, and Connor was reassured that Stef and Lena had nothing but love in their hearts and wouldn't hurt their children. It stung to know that his father didn't have that, and if he looked into himself deep enough, he was jealous at Jude for having an amazing family, which is loving and caring not only for people within the family, but also anyone who comes into the family, and thinking about that, Connor was reassured that he was part of this family, and he felt part of the Adams-Foster family. He spent a lot of time at their house, was basically a child to Stef and Lena, and he was always welcome. Stef and Lena even sometimes sat him down to discuss problems with him, if they saw that he was upset. Connor felt accepted and safe in their house, something he didn't feel when he was at home with his father. At home, he was scared all the time, he slept with his bedroom door locked from the inside so that his father wouldn't come in at night to beat him up. Thinking about that, he remembered the first time he slept over at Jude's. It had been less than a year ago, but Connor could still recall the conversation they had. It was the first time Connor had confessed to Jude about his situation.

Jude and Connor went up to Jude's room. Jude had just said goodnight to his mothers and this is when the real sleepover began. It was Connor's first sleepover at the Adams-Foster residence, so the two boys were excited. Jesus slept on the couch that night to give Jude and Connor some time for themselves. When they arrived in Jude's room, Jude took a fresh pair of pyjama's out of his closet, which he gave to Connor. He then grabbed his own pyjamas off his bed and went into the bathroom to change. Connor stayed in Jude's room and changed there. When he was just finished, he heard three knocks on the door.  
"Can I come in?" Jude asked.  
"Yeah, I'm done," Connor replied. Jude walked in and sat down on his bed. Connor walked over to the door and was surprised to find no key there.  
"Where do you keep your key?" Connor asked.  
"Key? What key?" Jude said.  
"They key for the doors," Connor said.  
"Why'd you need that?" Jude wondered.  
"To make sure nobody comes in during the night," Connor explained.  
"Nobody will come in, I promise," Jude said, trying to make Connor feel at ease a little more. Jude thought that Connor was just a little nervous to sleep in this house, as he'd never done it before. He figured that the idea of sleeping with seven other people scared Connor, as he was only child, and was used to sleeping with only his dad around.  
"Jude, can I confess something?" Connor asked, sounding somewhat nervous.  
"Sure," Jude replied.  
"You can't tell anybody," Connor said.  
"I promise," Jude said, happy to hear that Connor trusted him enough to tell him secrets.  
"My dad hits me at home," Connor said, and his voice broke.  
"What?" Jude asked, slightly upset when he remembered his earlier foster homes.  
"That's where all the bruises on my body come from," Connor stammered and tears flowed over his face as he sat down next to Jude on the bed. Jude grabbed Connor's hand, not knowing what else to do, but it seemed to comfort Connor. Jude stood up and gestured for Connor to do the same. He then proceeded to place his bed and Jesus' bed together.  
"What are you doing?" Connor asked.  
"I'm moving the beds together. Tonight, you won't feel alone, and you won't be scared," Jude said bravely, and Connor thought that this was insanely cute. When the two beds stood side by side, Jude gave Connor the choice on which side he wanted to sleep. Connor chose the right side, which was Jude's bed and the two boys lied down. Connor turned around to face Jude and stammered something which sounded like thank you. Jude was happy to help his best friend and told Connor that it was no problem. Connor smiled at him and turned back around, facing the wall. Jude scooted a little towards Connor so that he lied directly behind him and wrapped his arm around Connor in protection. This is when Connor first felt safe while sleeping since his parents had divorced. Connor smiled as he found safety and security in Jude and like that, he fell asleep.

Connor smiled thinking about the first time he and Jude had shared something that could be defined as love. They had been best friend then, but in hindsight, Connor thought that there were signs that something more was happening too, and he was only very glad that it had taken over, and that he could call Jude his boyfriend now.  
They got home around 6PM, and everybody was tired. They began unloading the cars, and everybody brought their belongings to their rooms, but nobody started unpacking yet. Most of the children lied down on their beds, tired from the journey, and they knew they would sleep very well that night, even Jesus, who had to sleep on the couch in the living room to make room for Connor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a comment on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask  
> Let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "One Last Sleepover".


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.

CHAPTER 7 - ONE LAST SLEEPOVER

Lena called out to the children. They were going to order pizzas and she wanted to know which pizza everyone wanted. They all gave their order, and Lena called to order. After about half an hour, the pizzas arrived and the children were called again. Jude, who had fallen asleep, was woken up by Connor. They headed downstairs and found their pizzas waiting for them. They ate in almost complete silence. The only sounds heard in the kitchen were the sounds of chewing and the occasional sip from a drink. When everybody was done, they were excused. Stef and Lena sat down on the couch with each a full glass of wine, while Brandon went to his room to play some piano. Mariana and Callie went to their room, probably reading something, and Jesus played a videogame. Jude and Connor went to Jude's room, and watched a movie there on Connor's PSP. Halfway through the movie, Lena walked in, saying that she and Stef were going to bed, and that the boys shouldn't make it too late either. They promised not to make it late, and Lena kissed Jude goodnight and ran her hand through Connor's hair. The boys resumed the movie while Lena walked out.

Connor stayed over one more night, as his father was in New York for business, and he would come home tonight, so he wasn't home yet. Connor didn't mind, as this meant he could spend another night with Jude. Connor's bruises had faded over the past week, and Jude had never seen Connor so beautiful. Without bruises, he saw Connor's beautiful body in a whole different light, and it made him hoping that he'd see Connor like that more often. When the movie was finished, Jude and Connor got themselves ready for bed. Connor, as a force of habit, walked over to the door to lock it, but reminded himself that he didn't have to do that here. Jude had pushed the beds together so that he and Connor could sleep together, and had changed into his pyjamas. Connor changed too, but didn't put on a shirt, to show Jude he hadn't any bruises once more. They lied down in bed, and as usual, Connor wrapped himself around Jude in a loving hug. After a while, Jude felt something cold in his neck, and he realized Connor was crying.

"What's wrong?" He asked.  
"It's nothing," Connor replied, his voice muffled by his pillow.  
"Connor, please tell what's wrong," Jude said, wanting to comfort his boyfriend. He tried to roll over to his other side, so he could face Connor, but Connor's arm held him back.  
"It's stupid," Connor said.  
"No it's not, whatever makes you sad is not stupid," Jude said.  
"No it is stupid, believe me," Connor cried.  
"Spill it," Jude said, caressing Connor's hand with his.  
"I'm afraid," Connor said.  
"What are you afraid of?" Jude asked, but he had the feeling like he already knew the answer.  
"I'm afraid to see my dad tomorrow," Connor sobbed.  
Jude rolled over, and faced Connor, whose eyes were red from crying. Connor looked at him with teary eyes, and it almost looked like Connor was begging Jude never to let him go home. Jude looked at him, and made sure that Connor could see in his eyes that Jude loved him and would always be there for him. Connor embraced Jude, and the two cuddled for a long time. When they finally broke the hug, Jude saw that Connor had cried even more, as his eyes were bloodshot.  
"Please don't cry, I know you're afraid, but you can't let him get you," Jude said.  
"I know, but it's hard not to," Connor said.  
"I know," Jude whispered, as he kissed Connor on the tip of his nose.  
"This might sound crazy," Connor began, but Jude interrupted him.  
"Nothing you say sounds crazy," he said.  
"Will you sing me a song?" Connor asked, "It calms me when you sing."  
"Sure," Jude said, mentally scrolling through a long list of songs he could sing, searching for a song that fit in this situation. He finally got a perfect song and started singing.

"I can't say that everything's okay  
Cause I can see the tears you're crying  
And I can't promise to take the pain away  
But you can know I won't stop trying

I'll be the angel by your side  
I will get you through the night  
I'll be the strength you can't provide on your own  
Cause when you're down and out of time  
And you think you've lost the fight  
Let me be the angel  
The angel by your side

I know it feels like you're running out of faith  
Cause it's so hard to keep believing  
But if I can bring a smile back to your face  
If for a moment, you'll forget all about it

I'll be the angel by your side  
I will get you through the night  
I'll be the strength you can't provide on your own  
Cause when you're down and out of time  
And you think you've lost the fight  
Let me be the angel  
The angel by your side

Cause this won't be the last time  
You'll need a little hope  
But I want to be the first to let you know

I'll be the angel by your side  
I will get you through the night  
I'll be the strength you can't provide on your own  
Cause when you're down and out of time  
And you think you've lost the fight  
Let me be the angel  
The angel by your side  
Let me be the angel  
The angel by your side"

Connor was tearing up again, but this time, it were tears of love and joy.  
"That was beautiful," he said, while he pulled Jude closer.  
Jude just snuggled Connor, giving him small kisses in his neck as Connor pulled himself together.  
"I know you'll always be there for me, and I love you for that, thank you so much," he said, smiling at Jude.  
"Hey, I'll be the angel by your side, dummy, it's what I'm here for," Jude said, smiling back. Connor kissed Jude's neck and thanked him for everything he'd done for him. Jude said he loved Connor and that he would do so much more if he had the chance, and Connor felt loved. He inhaled deeply and smelled Jude, a scent that Connor would never forget. Jude rolled on his back, and Connor laid his head on Jude's chest. Every time Jude inhaled, his head moved a little, and every time Jude exhaled his head went down. As result of this regular pattern, Connor began to feel sleepy and he yawned. It only took a few more minutes before Connor was sound asleep. Jude ran his hand through Connor's hair and thought about what would happen tomorrow, but he pushed away the thought, not wanting to think about it. He laid down his head, and after a little while, Jude fell asleep too.

In the middle of the night, Jude woke up. Connor was talking in his sleep, which had awakened Jude. After seeing that it was 2AM, Jude woke Connor, and told him to go to sleep again, which Connor did, and this time, he stayed quiet, giving Jude a little more time to sleep.

In the morning, Jude woke up first around 9 o'clock, and found that Connor had moved in his sleep. He wasn't lying on Jude's chest anymore, giving Jude some room to move, which meant that Jude had the opportunity of going to the toilet, which was needed, as Jude's bladder was always full after the night. When he was done, he washed his hands and went back in bed, making sure to be quiet so that he didn't wake up Connor. Jude took his book from his nightstand and read until Connor made a noise. Jude, knowing that this was a sign that Connor would wake up soon, put away his book and snuggled into Connor. A moan escaped from Connor's mouth, and Connor rolled over, his eyes beginning to open as Jude pressed his lips against Connor's.  
"Now that's a good way to wake up," Connor said groggily after he had broken off the kiss.  
"Happy to hear that," Jude answered, and he felt Connor's arm slipping past his hip and being placed on his back. As Connor tried to kiss Jude once more, Jude pulled back.  
"What's wrong?" Connor asked.  
"Your morning breath, that's what's wrong," Jude said, winking and laughing.  
"Dork," Connor said, kissing Jude, who didn't pull back this time.

They lied in bed for two hours more and then Connor said he was hungry, so they dressed themselves, rearranged the room to its original setup and went downstairs for breakfast. There was a note on the table, on which stood that Stef and Lena were shopping for groceries. They always left these kinds of notes whenever they went away, so that their kids knew exactly where they were, giving them a feeling of security. Especially Jude valued it very much, as in the past he had panicked sometimes when he didn't know where his foster parents were. When he got here and found notes on the table, he felt a little safer.  
Jude baked some pancakes for Connor and himself, and when they were done, they both sat down. Connor chuckled as he saw how Jude drenched his pancakes in syrup. When Jude was done, Connor took the bottle and put some syrup on his pancakes.  
"That's enough," Jude said.  
"What? You've got at least three times as many!" Connor protested.  
"Which is why you have to stop now, otherwise, there won't be any left for me!" Jude chuckled. Connor laughed at this remark, but did stop squirting the syrup out of the bottle, as he figured he had enough anyway.

After breakfast, it was time for Connor to go. Feeling somewhat afraid, Connor packed his bag and helped Jude clearing up the dishes, taking as long as possible to dry them off, not wanting to go home. But the time eventually came, and Connor was almost tearing up again, but Jude pulled him closer, leaned in and gave him the kiss of his lifetime, making Connor forget all about it.  
"Thank you, I needed that. This reminds me why I have to put up with that man," Connor said, smiling at Jude.  
"I need you," Jude said, winking at Connor, who turned around and walked away from Jude, turning left when he reached the end of the porch, and was out of Jude's sight. Jude stared at the place where Connor had just disappeared and sang a little part of a song to himself, but directed at Connor, who couldn't hear him anymore.

"Let it all come down  
All the tears and pain  
Open up, come in from the rain  
When it all comes down  
Throw your fears away  
Open up, come in from the rain"

He turned around, walked through the door and closed it behind him, wondering how long it would last for Connor to receive the first new bruise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask.  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The song Jude sings to Connor is "Angel By Your Side" by Francesca Batistelli.  
> The chorus of the song Jude sings to himself is "Come In From The Rain" by Y&T. This song was also the inspiration for the title of this fanfiction.  
> The next chapter is called "The Rain Came Down (Secrets Revealed)".


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jude and Connor enjoy their love as 14-years-olds, but are constantly aware of the possible dangers their relation has to face. Even when the most influential person seems out of the picture, his influence still breathes through their relation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that I'm late, and I am very sorry, I had problems logging in on fanfiction, so I couldn't post a new chapter, still, I hope you'll like it and forgive me!

CHAPTER 8 – THE RAIN CAME DOWN (SECRETS REVEALED)

On the first day of school, a week after the camping trip, Jude was waiting for Connor on their usual spot, a bench near the beach. Last time Jude had seen Connor, which was the day before, Connor still didn't have bruises, which Jude thought was curious. Just before the first bell rang, Connor arrived, and nothing seemed to have happened, but Jude noticed that Connor was wearing a long sleeved shirt, which was unusual for such a warm day. When Connor came closer and greeted him, Jude greeted Connor back. It didn't take long before Jude's curiosity took over.  
"Why are you wearing a long sleeved shirt?" he asked.  
"I'm cold," Connor said.  
"Really?" Jude asked.  
"Yeah, it's quite chilly here by the beach," Connor said, but Jude could see that he was lying.  
"Connor, don't lie to me. Why are you wearing a long sleeved shirt?" Jude asked, but something in him already knew the answer.  
"My dad beat me up again yesterday evening," Connor said, looking to the ground. Jude saw a few tears fall on the warm said, and he wanted to hug his boyfriend, but he realized he couldn't, as there were people around, and they weren't out on school yet.  
"I'm so sorry to hear that," Jude said, "is there anything I can do?"  
"Just be the angel by my side, please," Connor said, and smiled to Jude.  
"I will be," Jude said, and the bell rang. They got up, dried Connor's tears and made sure that nobody could see Connor had been crying. They went to their lesson whispering about what Connor's dad had done.

During their first break, Connor didn't want to sit near their friends, so he and Jude ate their snacks on the beach, which was one of the most beautiful places on Anchor Beach.  
"Could you roll up your sleeves?" Jude asked.  
"Why?" Connor asked, looking very nervous.  
"I wanna see what it was your dad did to you," Jude said. Slowly, Connor rolled up his sleeves, exposing his arms. Jude was shocked by what he saw. Connors arms were black and blue, and even if Connor had worn a shirt without sleeves, Jude would still have thought Connor was wearing sleeves.  
"We have to do something about it!" Jude exclaimed.  
"Sssssh," Connor shushed Jude, "Nobody can know!"  
"Why not? This is not good, Connor. You'll never get out of this!"  
"Jude, please," Connor begged, but couldn't finish his sentence as the bell rang and everybody stood up. There was too much noise for Connor to say what he wanted without anyone hearing him, so he and Jude made their way to the main building, where they parted for their own lessons.

During the second break, nothing happened. Connor didn't want to sit near their friends, so he and Jude sat down on the beach again and quietly ate their lunch. Jude shot worried looks at Connor from time to time, which Connor couldn't see, as he was too busy devouring his sandwich. When the bell finally ran, and Connor stood up to go to class, Jude grabbed his hand for a moment, stood op and whispered in Connor's ear that he loves him. Connor responded with a vacant smile and walked away.

After his lessons, Jude went to Lena's office and knocked on the door. Lena wasn't too busy and always had time for her students, so she said that he could come in, and was surprised to see Jude standing in the doorway.  
"Hey bud, what's up? Need a ride home?"  
"No, I got here by bike, but can I talk to you?"  
"Sure," Lena said, a bit worried, "What is it?"  
"Could you ask Monte to come too? She kinda needs to know too," Jude said.  
Lena, feeling worried about what might be going on with her son, summoned Monte, and the three of them sat down. Jude stood up to close the door, and lowered the curtains on the door, so nobody could look in.  
"You seem serious," Monte commented, and when she saw Jude's face, she went silent. Jude's face was covered in tears, as he knew that he was going against his boyfriend's will to tell his vice-principal and principal this, but he just couldn't stand it anymore. Lena walked over and hugged Jude until he stopped crying.  
"What's wrong honey?" She said, while she stepped in her role as mother instead of her role of vice-principal.  
"I… He asked me not to tell you, but… I just can't stand it anymore…" Jude stammered.  
"Who asked you not to tell? What can't you stand anymore?" Monte asked.  
"Connor… his dad beats him up almost daily," Jude said, his voice breaking.  
"Is that where all the bruises came from?" Lena asked.  
"Yes," Jude sobbed.  
"But I didn't see any bruises today," Monte began, but she was interrupted by Lena.  
"No, but he was wearing a long sleeved shirt," she said, "Jude, was he wearing a long sleeved shirt because his arms are bruised?"  
Jude nodded, knowing that he could not speak, but somehow, he found a little piece in himself that wanted to say how badly Connor was beaten up.  
"When I asked him to roll up his sleeve, I thought he had another shirt under it, his arms were that black and blue," Jude said. Monte and Lena cringed at the thought of that.  
"How long have you known about this?" Lena asked.  
"Since the first time he slept over," Jude admitted, "He was trying to lock the bedroom door, and I asked why, he told me then".  
Lena and Monte assured that Jude had done what was right for both him and Connor, and Jude just nodded and cried. Lena gave him the car keys and told him to wait in the car, even though Jude came by bike. Jude accepted her request and walked off.

"What should we do now?" Monte asked, unexperienced with these kinds of situations.  
"I don't know," was the unsatisfying reaction of the experienced educator, "first of all, we gotta talk to Connor."  
So the two of them walked over to Connor's maths class, where they asked for Connor. Connor, who was a popular student in his year, got cheers from his class, who all thought he'd done something bad. Connor was led to Lena's office, where he was sat down by Monte.  
"Connor, roll up your sleeve please," Monte asked, a little nervous of what she'd see.  
Connor, feeling very nervous, refused to do so.  
"Connor, it's okay, we're trying to help you," Lena said.  
Reluctantly, Connor rolled up his sleeves and Lena and Monte were shocked by what they saw.  
"Connor, who did this to you?"  
Connor, who couldn't hold himself together anymore, began to cry again, and said his dad had done it.  
"How long has this been going on?" Monte asked.  
"Ever since my mum and he divorced," Connor sobbed.  
"But that's nine years ago!" Lena exclaimed, shocked by that she'd never known.  
Connor nodded in confirmation.  
"Go to the nurse, Connor, get yourself checked up," Monte said, and Connor rolled up his sleeve and left.

Jude was sitting in Lena's car. He had just loaded his bike in the back, thinking he wouldn't have to cycle home. He had just settled in the passenger seat when he saw a figure in the distance, coming out of the school. As the figure came closer, he saw that it was Connor, and part of him wanted to get out of the car and embrace the love of his life, but part of him was too embarrassed to do so, as he knew that he'd broken his promise never to tell anyone. As Connor came closer, Jude saw his facial expression, and it didn't look good. Connor looked upset and Jude knew that he'd talked with Lena. As Connor saw Lena's car, he gazed through the window, half expecting to see Jude there, and when he did see Jude, his face became a rollercoaster of emotions. He felt in love as he saw Jude, but sad that Jude has broken his promise, and most of all, Connor felt angry at Jude for telling the principal and the vice-principal about his secret. Connor stared at Jude for a little while, but then broke the eye contact, turned around and walked away, not wanting to see Jude.

Jude opened the door of the car and got out of the car. He ran towards Connor, screaming out his name.  
"Connor, wait up," Jude said, but Connor didn't answer.  
"Connor stop," Jude tried again, but it didn't make a difference.  
"Connor please," Jude begged, but Connor increased his pace, leaving Jude with no choice but to run as fast as he could, but when Jude tried to get Connor's attention once again, Connor began to run as fast as he could, and Jude couldn't keep up with him. Soon, Connor was out of sight, and Jude returned to the car, pulling up his legs to his head, and he started crying.

After a little while, Lena came walking towards the car, and she saw Jude with his head buried in his legs, crying. She got into the car and laid her hand on Jude's back.  
"Sweetie it's alright, you've done what's right," She said, which made Jude cry even more.  
"Honey, in life you gotta choose between what's good and what's easy. Connor chose to do what's easy, taking his father's blows and not tell anybody. You've chosen to do what is right, standing up to Connor's dad by telling us what he did," Lena explained.  
"I just saw Connor, he saw me too. He looked angry at me. When he walked away, I tried to go after him, and he just increased his pace and finally ran away. He didn't even answer, he didn't stop, he didn't want to talk to me." Jude said, sobbing.  
"Oh sweetie, Connor is just upset that you told us, but he'll get over it and eventually, he'll thank you for it. He just needs some time to think about it. He knows you love him, and he knows you did it out of love for him."  
Just at that moment, they both were startled by a knock on the window, and they found Monte there. Lena opened the car door and let Monte speak.  
"Hey, you forgot your purse, so I was hoping you were still here. Turns out you are. Anyway, here's your purse!" she said.  
Lena thanked her and Monte turned to Jude.  
"It'll be alright, Jude, he'll come back," she said.  
After Lena had closed the door again, she said that Monte was right, and that Jude had to wait until Connor came back to him, and not to go looking for Connor, as Connor needed some time and space to figure this out for himself.

And Connor would come back, but sooner than expected. In fact, already that same evening, Connor would return into Jude's life, still angry and still upset, but he would be there again, seeking Jude.

They pulled out of the parking lot and went left, like always, and they headed home. Lena had her hand on Jude's, and only let go of his hand to switch gears, but her hand always returned to Jude's. When they got home, Stef had already come home from work, and Lena and Jude told her what had happened on school today, and Stef was equally as shocked as Lena had been to find out about what Connor's father had done to Connor during so many years. When Jude told her how Connor reacted when Jude wanted to make it right to Connor, Stef pulled him closer, and told him some of the same things that Lena had already told him, that everything would be alright and that Jude chose to do what was right, and that she could only admire Jude for it. Jude ended up receiving a mama sandwich, after which the three of them prepared dinner to distract Jude from thinking about Connor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask.  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "The Fight pt. 1".


	9. 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: As previous chapter was somewhat late, I figured I'd grant you guys this one a little early. Thank you so much for your support!

CHAPTER 9 – THE FIGHT PT. 1

When Connor came home, he could see that his father was not in a good mood. He quickly closed the door behind him and wanted to go upstairs unnoticed, so that his father wouldn't leash out his anger on him, but Connor's dad had already seen him.  
"Connor, would you mind coming in for a while?" Adam asked.  
Connor, relieved at his father's friendly tone, went into the living room.  
"What's up, dad?" Connor asked.  
"How was school today?" Adam asked.  
"It was good, I guess," Connor replied.  
"Nothing happened?" Adam asked.  
"No?" Connor said, suspicious at his dad's sudden friendly behaviour.  
"You didn't blab on school?" Adam asked, making Connor very uncomfortable.  
"No, I did not," Connor said.  
"LIAR!" Adam screamed, and Connor backed off in fear.  
"Dad, please listen," he began, but Adam didn't let him finish.  
"No, I won't listen, you listen to me. I've told you not to blab, and yet, here I was, minding my own damn business, when I got this phone call from your school. Some woman, Monte, spoke to me about how wrong it was to hit my son, and you're telling me you didn't blab? You really got to think hard about lies before you tell them," Adam ranted.  
"I did not blab!" Connor shouted.  
"Oh, of course you didn't, because how else would the board know?" Adam said sarcastically.  
"Jude told them," Connor admitted, somewhat ashamed.  
"Jude hmmm? When did you tell him?" Adam asked.  
"About a few months ago, because I needed someone to talk to!" Connor defended himself.  
"Talk about what? How I sometimes correct you with a little spanking?" Adam asked.  
"No, about how you continually beat the crap out of me," Connor stood up against his father. Adam, who hadn't expected his son to stand up to him, became red in anger.  
"You need to watch your steps, son. One more step and you're going too far," Adam warned Connor.

Connor didn't know what to do, he was cornered by his dad, and there was no way out of this situation. The only thing he could do was hoping that his father wouldn't hit him, but by the looks of it, there was no escaping from even worse bruises.  
"Dad, please listen to me once," Connor said in a calm voice. Adam didn't react, so Connor figured it was safe to talk.  
"I told Jude, because I needed someone to blow off steam with. He helped me get through a rough period, and I begged him not to tell anyone," Connor said.  
"So why did he?" Adam asked.  
"Because he was worried about me," Connor replied.  
"Well, he shouldn't be," Adam said.  
"Why not?" Connor asked.  
"Because I would never hurt you," Adam said.  
Connor, surprised by these words, slowly rolled up his sleeves and showed his dad his arms. His father didn't wince, he looked at it, and looked away again, not seeming to be bothered by his son's bruised arms.  
"Dad, you did that to me," Connor said.

And there it was, the first hit of this day, right on Connor's throat. He couldn't breathe for a few seconds, his throat blocked by the impact of the punch. When Connor got breath again, his father had already pulled his arm back again, ready for another punch. This time, he punched Connor on his left eye, leaving a small mark, that would soon turn into a black eye. Connor saw his chance to run, and he took it, sprinting out of the living room, grabbing his backpack in the action, and he ran up to the stairs. When he came on the top of the stairs, he turned right, ran through the small hallway and into his room. He heard his dad running after him, so he quickly turned around, slammed the door shut and locked it securely. He heard his dad reach the top of the stairs, bumping into the wall, and he ran through the hallway. Suddenly, Connor heard a loud sound, and realized his dad had tried to walk right through the door, but as these doors were thick, he didn't manage to. He heard a few more loud bashes, but his dad didn't manage to get through. Connor was sitting in the corner furthest from his door, curled up and afraid.  
"Ha! You're stupid to have done this. You won't be able to stay in there forever, and when you come out of that room, I will show you that I'm far from done with you." Adam called through the door.  
Connor then heard him sit down on the ground next to his door, and then he didn't hear anything.

Connor stayed in his room until evening fell, when his stomach began to growl as he got hungry.  
"Ha! I heard that, you're hungry aren't you?" Adam said, and Connor heard him walk away, but he got back within a minute, and somehow, he had a plate of some great-smelling food with him. Connor, tortured, clammed his fingers on his nose, so that he didn't smell anything, and just when he did that, the doorbell rang. Connor heard his father chewing, so he figured that his dad wasn't going to answer the door. The doorbell rang again, and his father still didn't answer. Suddenly, Connor heard a loud crack, and then he heard the door swinging open and hitting the wall next to it. He heard footsteps down the hall and he got even more scared. He heard sounds from downstairs, which were unmistakably voices, and then he heard two pairs of footsteps rushing up the stairs. When they arrived at the top of the stairs, he heard clear, unknown voices.  
"Adam Stevens? You're under arrest for child abuse. Anything you say can and will be used against you. You'll be allowed a lawyer as soon as we get to the police station."  
Connor heard his dad move around, and then the rushed footsteps of the policemen, who seemed to push Adam to the ground and handcuff him, as Connor first heard a smack, and then the clicking of iron on iron. He then heard three pairs of footsteps walk away from his door. He then heard two more walk up again, and they began opening the doors of the rooms on the upstairs floor. Connor heard his door handle being pulled down, and crawled up again, afraid that he had heard everything wrong and his dad was trying to come in again.  
"Connor, are you in there?" Connor heard an unknown voice asking.  
Connor didn't react. Worst-case scenarios were flowing through his head and he didn't want anyone to see him right now.  
"Jerry, this door is locked, I think the kid's in here." He heard the voice say again, and he got scared.  
He then heard a loud crack as the lock broke and his door flew open. Connor ducked away, his shoulders digging deeper into the small corner as he heard footsteps approaching.  
"Connor Stevens? We're the police. We've come here with people from the Child Protective Service, and we're here to help you." Connor didn't move, still not wanting this to be some part of his dad's plan to get to him.  
"Connor, I'm Jerry Hawkings, and this is my collegue Tony Quint. We're here to help you," Jerry said as he laid his hand on Connor's shoulder. Connor didn't resist.  
"Will you please stand up?" Tony asked, and Connor slowly did. He looked at the two men, and saw that they were wearing the same uniforms that he had seen Stef and Mike wear so often, and it felt comforting. Just at that moment, two more people walked in, in plain clothing, and Connor ducked behind Tony.  
"Connor, it's alright," Tony said, "these are Mary and Betty, they're from the Child Protective Service, they're here to help you".  
Connor slowly looked at them, and stepped away from Tony, who asked him to sit down on his bed. Connor did, and Mary laid a blanket over Connor's shoulder, trying to comfort him.

"Connor, are you afraid to talk to me?" Jerry asked.  
"No," Connor replied.  
"Are you willing to answer questions about your situation?" Tony continued.  
"Yes," Connor answered.  
"Alright, how long has your dad been beating you up?" Tony asked, and Connor cringed at the word 'beating'.  
"Around nine years," Connor answered.  
"Is there a reason we only came to know of it now?" Jerry asked.  
"My dad threatened to beat me up for good if I ever told it," Connor said, staring at the wall in front of him, in shock.  
"Why did we get to know it now?" Tony asked.  
"My best friend told the board of our school," Connor said, and he relived his anger at Jude.  
"What happened nine years ago, what was the trigger for your dad to start this?" Tony asked.  
"All I know is that my parents got divorced nine years ago," Connor replied.  
"Where is your mother?"  
"I haven't seen her in nine years."  
"Thank you very much, that'll be enough for now, Mary and Betty, will you please check him up? I heard he's particularly hurt on his arms, but now I look at him, I think I do see some fresh bruises on his throat and his left eye." Tony said, and he and Jerry left, leaving Connor alone with Mary and Betty, who checked up on him. They slid up his sleeves and were just as shocked about what they saw as Jude, Lena and Monte had been. They checked if any bones had gotten any damage, and then they went on to his throat, which had gotten red. When they were done there, they checked up on his eye, which they said would be alright, and they asked him to take off his shirt and pants, which Connor somewhat hesitantly did, and the two ladies saw that he hadn't been hit on his back, chest or legs in a long time. There were some older bruises, but nothing which hinted at fractures or other serious damage. They allowed Connor to pull up his pants and pull on his shirt again.  
"It looks like there won't be any permanent damage. No physical damage anyway. Some lady named Lena already gave her statement to the police, so you won't have to, they only might ask you to testify against your dad. Would you be willing to do that?" Mary asked. Connor thought about this, and hesitantly nodded his head.  
"Do you want to be left alone for a while, so you can think about tonight, and process it for yourself?" Betty asked, and Connor nodded. Just as Mary and Betty stood up, Connor stood up as well, walked out of the room and walked into the next room, which he locked again. Mary wanted to knock, but Betty said to her that it was best for Connor to feel safe, and that he felt safe with a locked door, so they both let him lock himself up. They went downstairs to clean the mess that the police had made while searching the house, and sat down. They'd be here until the hearing, for Connor's wellbeing and safety.

After Connor had locked himself up in the guestroom, he sat down on the bed and cried. He had lost his father. He just now realized that he had lost everything he still had, even if it was the worst thing that ever happened to him. He felt unsafe and alone. Trying to find some relief, he walked over to the window, opened it and screamed as loud as he could. It was raining outside, and his head got wet as he stuck it out of the window. He found comfort in the rain, and hung a little more forward. His torso was out of the window now too, and Connor felt his shirt getting soaked. It didn't matter to Connor, he loved it. He went back in, and stuck his leg out of the window, and his second leg followed. He sat down on the windowsill and just sat there for a while, being comforted by the rain, crying. His eye then fell upon the drainpipe, and his foot moved towards it. Soon, he found himself climbing down and he walked away from the house he grew up in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "The Fight pt. 2".


	10. Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10 – THE FIGHT PT. 2

Connor didn't know where to go, or where he would sleep tonight, as he wasn't sure he could go back home, but he knew he had to go and see Jude, so he headed to the Adams-Fosters house. He was drenched from the rain, but it didn't matter to him. He felt empty. He had lost his father and maybe even his home. He didn't feel like the world was right, or loving, or fair. He felt vacant, and his expression didn't say much differently.  
It was around 11PM, so he was surprised to see that there were still lights on in the living room. He knocked on the door, and a bewildered Stef opened the door, looking worried when she saw the new bruises.  
"Hey, I'm looking for Jude," Connor said.  
"Ehm, sure… He went to bed already, but I'm sure he'll make some time for you."  
Connor went up the stairs and opened Jude's door, just as lightning struck. He saw that Jude was standing by his window, which overlooked the back garden. Jude turned around, and saw a soaking wet, freshly bruised Connor. He figured Connor had escaped his dad during a new beating, and he ran over to Connor, trying to hug him, but Connor pushed him away, and Jude fell on his bed, shocked by his boyfriend's actions.

"Don't you dare come near me now," Connor snarled.  
Jude, taken aback from his boyfriends attitude, teared up a little.  
"Connor," he began, but Connor interrupted.  
"Don't you 'Connor' me, Jude Adams Foster!" He shot at Jude.  
"Alright, I don't know what's going on with you right now, but you came here to me, and now you're saying I shouldn't come to you? What are you thinking?" Jude said, trying to remain calm, but he was clearly upset.  
"That's right, cause I am here to tell you something," Connor snarled.  
"Well, by all means, tell me," Jude shot back, remaining polite.  
"You are a little selfish bitch, you know that?" Connor said.  
"Oh and why would I be?" Jude asked.  
"Because somehow, you managed to screw my whole life over, in one selfish action," Connor said.  
"Oh, so I'm selfish?" Jude asked.  
"Yes, you are. And now, I've lost my dad. You'll be pleased to know he got arrested. Besides that, I probably lost the house where I was born, where I spent my childhood, where I've been happy," Connor ranted.  
"And you think I don't know how that feels?" Jude asked, in tears, both of anger and pain that his boyfriend treated him like this, "I, of all people you know, might know the best how it feels having to leave your childhood home, or losing a dad for that matter".  
"That's different," Connor shouted  
"How is it different? We both lost our parents, now, but at least you still have your mom. She'll probably try to reach you now your dad's arrested!" Jude screamed back.  
"Hey, hey, what's the matter here?" Stef shouted while she walked in, trying to be louder than the boys. Both Jude and Connor looked at the door, and saw that everybody (except Jesus, who slept over at a friend's) were standing in the hallway, watching the fight.  
"Ask him," Jude said angrily, while he walked out of the room and sprinted down the stairs. Stef was trying to go after him, but Lena held her back, saying he needed time to cool off. They sent the other kids back to bed, and sat down with Connor.

"Connor, what's wrong?" Stef asked.  
Connor kept silent, not wanting to speak.  
"Connor, after you didn't respond to Jude this afternoon, we got worried about you even more. I called the police, in my role as vice-principal. It's part of the standard procedure we have planned out for these kinds of situations. I was doing my job, and Jude was looking out for you. He's not selfish, you know that. He did this to protect you, and that's because he loves you. He was worried about you, and he know you didn't dare to do anything, so he did it for you. He wanted to make life easier for you," Lena tried to soothe Connor.  
"Well, he did a good job almost killing me," Connor said, still angry.  
"Connor, Jude never meant to do that, and you know that he didn't. What happened?" Stef said, her voice soothing as can be, and Connor relaxed a little.  
"When I came home, my father was friendlier than ever. He asked me how school was and such, but soon, he changed subject and confronted me with that I would have told the board about what he did. I tried to stand up to him, but he beat me, first on my throat, making me unable to breath, which made me an easy victim for the next punch, which was on my eye. I then could escape, but he chased after me, so I locked myself up in my room. He sat down next to my room, waiting for me to come out of my room, but the police arrived and arrested him. I then testified against him and talked with some people from a Child Protective Service, and I locked myself into the guestroom, trying to feel safe. I snuck out, so I could see Jude, but when I saw him here, I got angry at him again, as he made me realize that he made me lose my father," Connor summarised his afternoon. Just when he was finished, Callie walked in, holding a wet towel with ice in it, which Connor took and held against his eye, wondering why Betty and Mary hadn't given him that. Callie went out again, going to sleep, as Stef pulled Connor close to her and embraced him.

Lena went out of Jude's room to look for Jude, and found him curled up on the couch in the living room, crying. She walked over to him, lifted his head, sat down and laid his head on her lap. She stroked her fingers through his hair.  
"We talked to Connor," she said, "And he told us what happened. He's had a tough afternoon, and I need you to realize that. You've already seen his new bruises, which is only part of what happened. But it might be best if Connor told you what happened himself".  
"If he ever speaks to me again, or if I'll ever let him speak to me again," Jude answered.  
"Don't say that, I know you're angry, and you have all the reason to be, but think of it from Connor's perspective," Lena said.  
"I just don't get it," Jude said, "after he talked to you, he completely ignored me on school, and then he shows up freaking late, and starts yelling at me, I just don't know how to handle that".  
"I understand, but will you please come upstairs with me, so we can talk this out between the four of us?" Lena asked, and Jude stood up, ready to walk upstairs, but Lena held him back. She hugged him, and Jude gratefully hugged her back. He needed a hug, and Lena had seen that.

When they arrived in Jude's room, Connor looked at Jude and saw that Jude had been crying. He got a lump in his throat and wasn't able to speak for a few seconds. When he finally got rid of the lump, he apologized to Jude.  
"I'm sorry that I acted like that, Jude, I shouldn't have. I didn't have reason to, and I know you're not selfish and I'm just upset," Connor rattled, tears forming in his eyes.  
"Will you please explain to me what happened? Then I can understand your point of view," Jude asked.

"I think I owe you that, yea," Connor said, sighing. "Well, I was sitting in maths when your mum and Monte pulled me out and took me to your mum's office. They asked me to pull up my sleeves, which I reluctantly did, and showed them my bruises. They told me to see the school nurse, which I didn't do and I walked home instead. I guess they then called the police, while I was busy trying to get away from you (sorry about that, I was angry). When I got home, my dad was pretty friendly to me, and he asked me to come into the living room, which I did, after which he started about me blabbing on school. I told him you did it, but he didn't believe me, so he hit me in my throat and then on my eye. I saw a chance to escape, but he came running after me, so I locked myself up in my room. After a while the police came and arrested him. They forced open my bedroom door where they found me, terrified of what would happen. They told me they were cops, and I relaxed a little, until two women came walking in, who were explained to be from some Child Protective Service. I testified against my dad, and the ladies checked me out to see if I got any serious damage, which I don't, and then I locked myself in our guestroom, trying to feel safe. I snuck out to see you, but when I saw you, I relived my anger at you and I flipped. I'm sorry I shouldn't have done all of that. I know it was hurtful to hear some of that, and I'm sorry. I love you," Connor explained.

The last three words Connor had said soothed Jude the most. Just to hear that Connor still loves him, made Jude feel a lot better. He sat down next to Connor, wrapped his arm around him and told him it was okay. Connor laid his head on Jude's shoulder, and cried about how stupid he'd been. Jude dried Connor's tears with his thumb and that was a sign for Connor that everything was alright between him and Jude.  
"Is there anything we could do to make this easier for you?" Stef asked.  
"I just want to feel safe right now, knowing my dad can't hurt me anymore," Connor said.  
"Would you like to stay with us until the hearing, or until you've found another place to stay?" Lena asked.  
"I'd like to, yeah," Connor responded.  
"Could you give me the key to the guestroom?" Stef asked, and Connor gave it to her. She said she'd go to Connor's house to inform Betty and Mary, while Jude set the beds together for Connor to sleep in. When Lena asked Jude why he did that, he replied that he wanted to make sure Connor felt safe, and Connor agreed that he felt most safe when he was with Jude, so Lena approved.

Stef walked to the car, and started it. She drove towards Connor's house, where she rang the doorbell. When Mary opened the door, Mary said that she was not the owner of the house, but was there in the name of the Child Protective Service, to which Stef showed her police identification card, and asked to come inside. Mary allowed her, and they sat down in the living room.  
"So Connor came over to our house just now," she began, but was interrupted by Betty.  
"No, that can't be, he's locked himself in the guestroom," she said.  
"Please, hear me out," Stef asked, and the ladies did. "He snuck out via the drainpipe and went over to see my son, Jude, his best friend and boyfriend." Betty and Mary frowned when they heard the word 'boyfriend' but they let Stef continue. "He came over to us, had a fight with Jude, but the two made up pretty soon. He then asked me and my wife to stay with us until the hearing," Stef finished, and Betty and Mary frowned again when they heard Stef had a wife.  
"How do we know you're not lying, and that Connor isn't sound asleep in the guestroom?" they asked.  
"Well, for one, I got the key of the guestroom right here, so you can check the guestroom, and secondly, you could come with me and see Connor for yourself," Stef said. Mary went upstairs with the key, and came back with the news that the guestroom was indeed empty, after which they both came with Stef to see Connor. Stef called Lena to keep Jude and Connor awake, as Betty and Mary were coming with her to see Connor.

When they arrived at the Adams-Foster house, Jude and Connor were drinking hot chocolate, and Connor panicked a little upon seeing Mary and Betty.  
"Connor, why did you sneak out?" Mary asked, her tone wasn't angry, so Connor didn't feel attacked.  
"I wanted to see Jude," he explained.  
"We see, does he make you feel safe?" Betty asked.  
Connor shot a look at Jude, smiled at him and replied to Betty's question.  
"Very safe," he said and kissed Jude on his cheek.  
"Then I guess everything is fine. He will be allowed to stay with you until the hearing. Our job was to make sure he felt safe, so if he feels most safely with Jude and you around, it's our job to let him stay here. We will come and check in on you every other day, just to be sure," Betty said, and Connor agreed.  
"We will also be present at the hearing, as will Tony and Jerry, to testify against your dad, based on how we found you after they arrested your dad," Mary said, and Connor agreed again. They then wished him goodnight, and said they'd be back the day after tomorrow, and Connor just nodded his head. The two boys finished their hot chocolate and went to bed, tired, but most of all happy that they could put this day behind them.  
In bed, they apologized to each other once again, after which Jude wrapped his arm around Connor, making sure Connor felt safe, and they fell asleep like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "The Hearing".


	11. Chapter 11

CHAPTER 11 – THE HEARING

During the week between the day Connor's dad was arrested and the day of the hearing, Connor stayed at the Adams-Foster house, and the family chose not to make a big deal out of it, and just do what they'd normally do, not giving too much attention to the fact that Connor was there, to make sure Connor didn't feel attacked in any way, or otherwise uncomfortable. Secretly, Jude, Lena and Stef kept a close eye on Connor, to make sure he was doing alright and they'd help him where needed. When he broke down, Jude would be there for him to comfort him, and when Connor needed advice, Stef and Lena were around to help him. A few days after the arrest, Connor came up to Stef.

"Hey Stef," Connor said.  
"Hey Connor, what's up?" Stef asked.  
"I have a question…" Connor said.  
"Sure, ask away," Stef said while she sat down on the couch and Connor sat down next to her.  
"How am I going to handle the hearing?" Connor asked.  
"How do you mean?" Stef wondered.  
"Like… how am I going to stand up against my dad, if they're asking me to testify?" Connor asked.  
"Well, first of all, there is no way your father can get to you to hit you. He will be guarded, so you shouldn't be afraid to speak the truth," Stef said.  
"Alright, that's good to hear, but what do I say?" Connor asked.  
"The judge or the person you'll be talking to will ask you questions. If you answer them as honestly as you can, you'll be good," Stef explained.  
"And what if I feel like that doesn't say enough?" Connor asked.  
"Then you say whatever is on your mind. Nobody is going to look at you like you're weird. Everyone in court understands that a victim can be upset, or confused. So as long as you're telling the truth, no matter how you tell it, it will be good," Stef explained.  
"Alright, that's comforting, thank you so much," Connor said as he stood up and walked away, giving Stef a thankful smile. When he had just reached the stairs, Stef called for him. He turned around to face her.  
"Just two more pieces of advice," Stef said.  
"Sure, the more the better," Connor said, smiling  
"First of all, always direct the judge with 'your honour', that's the right way, and secondly, don't look at your father when you're speaking. That might get you nervous and if he looks intimidating enough, it might cause you to lie, which could have a more negative influence on the case," Stef said.  
"Thank you," Connor said, he smiled at Stef again, and turned around again to walk up the stairs.  
"Would you want any of us to come with you to court?" Stef asked, and Connor slowly turned around again.  
"Could you come, together with Jude? It might make me feel like I'm not alone," Connor said.  
"Sure, we'll arrange that," Stef said, her voice soft and sweet.  
"And could it be arranged that Jude would be allowed to sit next to me? I think I'm gonna need someone by my side, and I really want Jude to be that person," Connor asked, a little nervous.  
"I will arrange that with the judge," Stef said, comforting Connor. She walked over to him and gave him a hug, like she'd do to any of her own children, and Connor felt like Stef was partly his mother, and it gave him a feeling of security.

When Connor walked into Jude's room, Jude was playing a videogame, and Connor sat down next to him, watching Jude play.  
"What did she say?" Jude asked.  
"She gave me some good advice and said she'd arrange that you could sit next to me in court," Connor said. Jude paused his videogame and looked at Connor.  
"You want me to sit next to you?" he asked.  
"Yeah," Connor said, "I don't want to face this alone, and I need someone to give me the strength I need to do this, and the one person who always helps me the best is you," Connor said and Jude smiled, happy to be able to help his boyfriend get through this.

On the day of the hearing, everybody got ready for school, except for Connor and Jude, who had gotten permission to be absent from school (one of the few perks of having a mom who is the vice-principal of your school). They both lent a suit from Jesus and dressed themselves after breakfast, afraid to spill syrup on their clothes.  
"How're you feeling?" Jude asked Connor as he pulled on his jacket.  
"A little nervous," Connor replied, "but maybe even happy after the hearing, I don't know, we'll see".  
Over the last week, Connor had learnt to translate his fear for his father into anger, which made it easier for him to testify against his father, although he also learnt how to control his anger, so that he wouldn't seem too angry during the hearing. As Jude was finished tying his tie, he wanted to tie his shoelaces, but Connor needed help.  
"I've never done this before, could you help me with my tie? I can't seem to tie it well…," he asked.  
Jude walked over to Connor and tied his tie for him, kissing him when he was done to comfort him. They both tied their shoes and were done just in time for Stef to call them.  
"Come on boys, let's go, let's go, let's go," she shouted from the bottom of the stairs, and the two boys looked at each other and laughed nervously at Stef's signature phrase.

When they arrived at court, Stef sat down in the audience, while Jude and Connor walked over to their seats in the front. They waited for the hearing to start, and after ten minutes, Adam was led into the courtroom, took his seat and two policemen stood behind him. Adam looked at Connor, but Connor, following Stef's advice, didn't look back. The judge and the jury came in, and the judge asked for silence. He then began with reading the charges. First, Adam's lawyer got the floor, and he did his job defending Adam. When the judge asked Adam if he pleaded guilty or not, Adam said he didn't plead guilty. Then Connor's lawyer got the floor, and he defended Connor, telling the judge the details of what Adam had done and Connor was saved by the police and the Child Protective Service. Upon hearing this, Connor looked around, and he locked eyes with Jerry, Tony, Mary and Betty who smiled at him, trying to reassure him. Connor felt a little more confident, and listened to his lawyer again, who just rounded off his plea. The judge then addressed Connor.  
"Connor Stevens, would you please stand up?" He asked, and Connor did. A man with a bible in his hand walked over to him and the judge continued.  
"Lay your hand on the bible," he said and Connor did, "and repeat after me. I swear to speak the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth".  
"I swear to speak the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth," Connor repeated and the man with the bible walked away again.  
"Connor Stevens, did this man, your father, Adam Stevens both physically and mentally abuse you, like the charges state?" the judge asked.  
"No, your honour," Connor said.

"No?" the judge repeated.  
"No, your honour. Yes, my father did physically abuse me as the charges state, but he only indirectly abused me mentally. Your honour, the only way in which I am mentally harmed is by knowing that someone who should have protected me didn't, and was the one who did this. It was knowing that the man who should have been my role model, never could be my role model. It was knowing that I couldn't trust the man who I should be able to trust, who should have taught me about trust. It was knowing that the man who should have kept me from evil was the evil in my life for nine long years. It was having to lock my bedroom door in order to feel safe at night, even when I slept over at the houses of my peers. It was dreading vacations, because I didn't want to be around my father for so long. It was being over at my friend's house more often than I was home. It was being afraid every time my dad walked in the room. That is the mental abuse I got. So no, my father did not mentally abuse me, but his actions causing my physical damage also caused my mental damage. His fists abused me both physically and mentally, your honour," Connor said, and as he sat down, he felt a hand on his back.

He looked beside him and saw Jude with tears in his eyes. He looked to the audience, where he found Stef, her eyes red from crying, dabbing her face with her handkerchief. He looked over to his dad, knowing that now he had spoken, he couldn't take anything back, and his dad didn't look at him. His father stared at the table and did nothing. From his posture, Connor could see that his father sensed his defeat. The jury went out to discuss and in the meantime, Stef walked over to Connor to say that she was proud of him, and that he was brave to say all of that even though it wasn't needed. Connor said he was just happy to have said everything after having to hide it for nine years. Stef looked at Adam, who was still staring at his table.

When the jury came back, everybody in the courtroom sat down again and looked to the jury expectantly. The spokesman of the jury stood up, stood behind the microphone and told the court the jury's decision.  
"The jury decided unanimously that Adam Stevens is guilty, but with a small alteration. His punishment must be somewhat less severe, as mister Stevens never intentionally mentally hurt Connor, as it was indirect mental abuse, as Connor proclaimed himself," he said.  
"Alright, that brings us to the punishment. Mister Stevens will permanently lose his parental rights over Connor, and besides that, he will serve up to five years in jail," the judge said and the gavel came down.  
As the audience applauded, Adam turned towards the judge.  
"What does that mean?" he asked.  
"It means that lawfully, you are as much Connor's father as I am," the judge explained, and Connor's eyes lit up, while Adam's eyes grew dark. The police officers both grabbed one of Adam's arms and led him out of the courtroom first, as was customary. When they almost reached the heavy double doors, Connor turned towards the judge.  
"Could I say one last thing to him?" he asked.  
"If that is what you want, I will not deny you that," the judge said and the officers and Adam turned around.  
"I am not sorry that I stood up for myself when I told Jude, and I'm not sorry that he stood up for me when he told the board, and I'm not sorry for that I stood up for myself just now. The only regret I have is not telling this earlier, but I was afraid. Afraid of you. But the same time I kept this secret, I have kept another secret from you. Now that you're not lawfully my relative anymore, I feel like I have to tell you, before you walk out of my life, hopefully forever. Jude is not my best friend. Jude is my boyfriend," Connor said, while grabbing Jude's hand. The court applauded again, moved by Connor's words, while Adam's face reddened. He was turned around by the officers and the three of them walked out of the courtroom, and Connor, although afraid of the near future, hoped that his father was out of his life forever, and he would be able to live a life of safety, hopefully together with Jude.

Stef walked over to the boys and the three of them walked out of the courtroom a few minutes after Adam had left, so that there was no possibility that they'd see him. On the way home, they stopped for lunch and Jude and Stef praised Connor for this strength and courage to stand up for himself like that and testify against his father. Connor told them that it was only because Jude was by his side that he felt confident enough to say all of that, and Jude felt flattered. They continued their drive home, and back home, Jude and Connor went upstairs to watch a movie and relax after such a strenuous morning.

In the afternoon, the phone rang and Stef picked it up. After a minute, the boys heard her call out from the bottom of the stairs.  
"Connor it's for you!" Stef called and Connor rushed downstairs and took the phone, questioning who would call him here.  
"Hey Connor, it's Erin."  
"Mom?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: Hey guys, I'm not here on the actual day I should post this, and I thought I'd rather post it a day early than a day late, so here you go!

CHAPTER 12 – NEW OLD PARENT

"Connor it's for you!" Stef called and Connor rushed downstairs and took the phone, questioning who would call him here.  
"Hey Connor, it's Erin."  
"Mom?"  
"Yes, sorry, it's mom."  
"I can't believe I finally talk to you again," Connor said.  
"When Mary, from Child Protective Service called me and told me what happened, I just had to call you. I want you to know that I got my parental rights, and I now got custody over you, and I'm glad to finally be able to see you again," Erin said.  
"Where are you?" Connor asked.  
"I'm still in Minnesota, where I've lived since the divorce, but I'm flying out tomorrow, I'm busy packing and we'll live there in San Diego together so you can finish your school and stay with your friends. It's arranged that we can live in the house where you grew up, and I've sent some guys to repair your bedroom door," Erin said.  
"They told you everything, didn't they?" Connor said, surprised by how much his mother knew.  
"I think so yes," Erin replied.  
"Did they tell you anything personal about me?" Connor said, hoping that his mother didn't know about him and Jude.  
"Only that you are a strong young man, who is good with words. They described how you pleaded, and it sounds like you're well educated!" Erin said enthusiastically.  
"So nothing really personal?" Connor asked.  
"No, why?" Erin asked.  
"Nothing, just checking how much I have to tell you. We haven't seen each other in nine years, so there's probably a lot to catch up on for both of us," Connor responded.  
"Oh well, I'll arrive tomorrow afternoon at the airport, will you come to welcome me?" Erin asked.  
"Oh, sure. What time to you arrive?" Connor asked.  
"Around 4PM Pacific time," Erin responded.  
"Alright, I will pick you up then. And Jude and I will do some shopping and we will make you dinner, so you don't have to," Connor said, accidently talking about Jude.  
"Jude?" Erin asked.  
"Oh, he's my best friend, we do a lot together, and I'm at his place now, his moms let me stay with them until I found something else," Connor explained.  
"I can't wait to meet him," Erin said.  
"Well, see you tomorrow around 4 then," Connor said.  
"See you tomorrow," Erin said, and she hung up.

Connor called Jude downstairs and told him and Stef everything about the phone conversation, and Jude agreed to spend the afternoon and evening with Connor's mother, as it was Saturday the next day, so he wouldn't have to do anything anyway, and he figured Connor might need him, as he could tell that Connor was pretty nervous about meeting his mother again.

(*)

When the boys woke up next morning, Connor was in panic. He hadn't seen his mother in nine years, and could hardly remember her. His father had thrown out all pictures of her, and Connor couldn't save any, as he was only five years old at the time, and hardly knew what was going on. Jude calmed him down by saying that it was no problem, they'd just make a sign with her name and she'd be able to find them on the airport. The rest would come later. Connor, assured by this, lied down again and kissed Jude on the tip of his nose. They cuddled for a long time, until Jude, who was lying with his head on Connor's tummy, heard Connor's stomach growl and burst out in laughter. The two got dressed, checked each other out, and went downstairs for breakfast.  
"Morning boys, did you sleep well?" Lena asked.  
"Yeah we did," Connor said, while he gratefully accepted a pancake that Stef offered him.  
"Jude, go easy on the syrup, okay? This is the last bottle and the rest still needs breakfast too," Stef said, while she and Lena walked out of the door for a doctor's appointment.  
"Don't you laugh at me like that," Jude told Connor, but it didn't come across as serious as Jude wanted, because a grin formed on his face.  
"Sorry, I just relived the morning after the camping trip, where you told me that I had enough syrup when your plate was literally flowing over," Connor said.  
"Don't exaggerate like that, it was not flowing over," Jude said, but chuckled at the memory.

The two cleaned up the dishes after they were done, Jude washing them, and Connor drying them. Afterwards, they planned the rest of their day. First they would go shopping for groceries, as that gave the rest some time to wake up. Then they'd go upstairs, lie down for a little longer, as both boys were still quite tired, both not having slept well from all the adrenalin they still had from the day before. They didn't know yet what they'd do when they were going to do in Jude's room. They could watch a movie, play videogames, or something else, like borrowing Brandon's keyboard and have some fun on that. Around three thirty, they'd take the bus to the airport, where they'd wait for Erin. Then they'd take the bus to Connor's house and they'd cook there, while chatting with Erin about what had happened in nine long years. Around nine thirty, Jude would go home, because he had to be back at ten, and their day would be over.

So first, they went to the supermarket. The others were still sound asleep, so they made sure not to wake them. On their way to the supermarket, they bickered about what they were going to make. Eventually, they settled on spaghetti bolognese, as this was easy to make, and it still tasted enormously good. Neither of them had ever made it, so there was some discussion about the ingredients when they arrived at the supermarket.  
"Tomatoes? What are those for?" Connor asked.  
"Ehm… we're making spaghetti bolognese right? I mean, there are tomatoes in that…," Jude replied.  
"I'm pretty sure there aren't," Connor said.  
"Are you sure you're gonna cook for your mother this evening if you don't even know the basic ingredients of what you're making?" Jude asked while laughing.  
"Very funny, but I'm sure that there aren't any tomatoes in the sauce," Connor said.  
Jude retrieved his phone from his pocket and did a small internet search, after which he proudly presented his phone to Connor.  
"See, it's on top of the list. Tomatoes are ingredients of the sauce," he said victoriously, laying the tomatoes in the cart.  
Connor, recognizing his defeat, pouted, but chuckled as he saw Jude in his victorious mood.  
"You look very cute like that, makes me wanna kiss you," he whispered and laughed when he saw Jude's expression go from happiness to worry, as they were in a public place and they weren't out yet.  
"Shhhh, don't say that!" Jude exclaimed, and some people looked over to see what was going on. Connor started laughing even harder, punching Jude's shoulder, and Jude let out a relieved sigh. He was relieved that nobody had heard Connor say that to him, even though there was nobody that they knew around to hear it. When they had gathered all the groceries they needed, they went to the pay desk, and after they'd payed, they loaded everything in bags, after which they cycled to Connor's house.

When they got there, they placed the bags on the kitchen counter, and just as Jude wanted to head out again to go back to the Adams-Foster house, but Connor stopped him.  
"Jude!" He exclaimed, causing Jude to turn around in alarm.  
"What's wrong?" Jude asked, his voice sounded worried.  
"Nothing, I was just thinking… When we get to your house, the rest will be awake," Connor said.  
"Yeah, so?" Jude asked.  
"I thought we could spend some more time together… You know… Just the two of us… Alone," Connor said, and Jude saw the mischievous look on his face. Jude copied the mischievous expression to tease his boyfriend.  
"Oh yeah? What do you want to do?" He asked.  
"I thought we could go to my room to… have some fun," Connor said and Jude was shocked by his boyfriend's words.  
"No, no, sorry, no. I can't. Connor, we're fourteen years old, I don't want to rush into this! We're kids! Especially since Callie got raped in the other foster home I've told you about, no, I'm not ready. No, sorry," Jude stammered. On one hand, he was confident not to do what Connor was implying, but on the other hand, he hated to disappoint his boyfriend.  
"Oh, Jude, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to give off that vibe. No, I never intended to sound that way. I don't want to do it either. I just meant that we could cuddle on my bed!" Connor reassured Jude.  
"Oh… good. Thank God. If you only want to cuddle, I could be into that. But only cuddling!" Jude giggled.

The two went upstairs, Jude following Connor and when they got to Connor's room, Connor lied down on his bed, spreading his arms and legs, so that there was no space for Jude. Jude pouted.  
"I thought you wanted to cuddle," he said, but Connor didn't move.  
"You can lie on top of me if you want," Connor smirked while he winked at Jude.  
"Dork," Jude said, while he lied down on top of Connor, his lips immediately searching Connor's, but just as they were about to close the gap in between their lips, Jude's phone rang. The two boys started laughing, feeling a little embarrassed, as it felt like they'd been caught by the person on the other side of the line. Jude picked up his phone, still smiling at Connor.  
"Hey, it's Jude," Connor could hear him say.  
"Oh, hey Callie!  
...  
Oh yeah sorry, we forgot to lay down a note for you guys.  
...  
We went to the supermarket to get groceries for our dinner with Connor's mum tonight.  
...  
Yeah, we dropped them off at Connor's place, we're still there, but we'll come home soon, I promise.  
...  
No, you don't have to come and get us, we can cycle.  
...  
No really, it's okay, we're fine.  
...  
Okay, see you in a while."

"Well, that was awkward", Jude said after he hung up the phone. Connor giggled and pulled Jude closer again, this time actually closing the gap between their lips, pulling Jude into a long kiss. When they finally broke, Connor looked at Jude with the same mischievous look as before, and ran his hand down Jude's chest. When he reached the end of Jude's shirt, he lifted the shirt slightly, running his hand up Jude's bare tummy.  
"You mind if we both take off our shirts and then cuddle some more?" He whispered.  
"No I don't mind," Jude whispered back, although neither of the boys knew why they were whispering, as there was nobody around to hear them. Connor winked at Jude and pulled Jude's shirt over his head, after which he allowed Jude to do the same to him. Connor lied on his back and Jude lied on top of him. Jude placed his hand on Connor's chest, and gave him small kisses on his neck.  
When they had cuddled for quite some time, Jude remembered what he'd said to Callie about coming home. He gave Connor one last kiss before he came off the bed, pulled on his shirt again, and helped Connor get off as well.  
"We have to go, I promised Callie, besides, I still have to change, and we almost gotta go to the airport!" He said. Connor shot a look at the clock and when he saw the time, he also pulled on his shirt and walked with Jude to the door.

When they came at the Adams-Foster home, Jude opened the door with his key and they went in.  
"Jude is that you?" Callie screamed from the kitchen.  
"Yes, it's me!" Jude shouted back  
"Thank God, I was worrying!" Callie said, while she came closer.  
"Don't be, we can handle ourselves," Jude said and he knew that Connor was smirking.  
Jude went upstairs to change while Connor stayed downstairs to give Jude some privacy. In just one minute, Jude came back and the two of them walked over to the door.  
"Oh Callie?" Jude shouted towards the kitchen, where Callie had settled again.  
"Yeah?" they heard from the kitchen.  
"I'll be home by ten, so don't worry if I don't come earlier," Jude said, and he and Connor laughed. They went through the door and went left when they came at the end of the driveway. The nearest bus station was right around the corner, so they didn't have to walk far. When they sat down, Connor looked at the upcoming stations, and realized that this bus didn't even go to the airport.  
"Jude? This bus doesn't go to the airport," he said.  
"Are you serious? I thought every bus went there!" Jude said.  
"No, but two stations away from here we can transfer to another bus that will go there," Connor replied.  
"Alright, we'll do that then," Jude agreed.

They got to the airport in twenty minutes, and when they looked at the clock, they saw that Connor's mother had just landed. They knew that she'd still have to get out of the plane and get her luggage, so they didn't hurry to get to the arrivals hall. When they got there, nobody had come out yet, so they waited in front of the door. In ten minutes, the first people arrived and Connor held up the sign that they'd made that morning. Five more minutes later, a woman came walking towards them.  
"Connor? I'm Erin… I mean, I'm mom," she said. Connor was left speechless. He didn't at all recognize her.  
"I'm so glad to see you, I've missed you," Erin said.  
"I missed you too," Connor muttered, still at a loss for words.  
"And you're Connor's friend Jude, I suppose?" Erin said, while giving Jude a hand.  
"Yes ma'am, I am," Jude said, trying to be as polite as possible.  
"Pleasure to meet you," Erin said, giving Jude a big smile.  
Jude and Connor both took one of Erin's big suitcases and dragged them across the airport so that Erin wouldn't have to do that by herself. Once they got out of the main building, they walked over to the bus station and took the right bus. This bus stopped right across the street of Connor's house, where Connor and his mother would live. When they got there, Connor showed Erin around, as Erin had never been in this house before. Adam had bought this house after the divorce, as their old house remembered him too much of Erin, or so he had said. Connor showed her where she would sleep and they placed the suitcases in this room. In the meantime, Jude had started cooking, and Connor when Connor and Erin came back from upstairs, Connor went to help Jude. Erin wanted to help too, but Connor told her they were fine and she sat down. During the preparation for dinner, Connor and his mother caught up. Connor told Erin what was going on in his life (although he did leave out his relation with Jude), and Erin told Connor what had happened in hers.

When dinner was ready, they sat down at the table and started eating.  
"Connor, this is delicious!" Erin exclaimed.  
"All credits go to the chef!" Connor said, pointing at Jude.  
"You did most of the work!" Jude protested.  
"All I did was following your instructions!" Connor said, "I didn't even know that we needed tomatoes to make this!" he added, making Erin laugh.  
"Well in that case, Jude, this is delicious!" Erin said, "You can cook for us more often!"  
Connor touched Jude's foot under table to let Jude know that he agreed with his mother.  
"Mom, I there's something I left out when I told you about my life now. Dad has known the wrong me for a long time, I only told him this after the hearing, but I want to start a new life. Part of that life is you, a new parent, but part of it is also me. I don't want you to know the wrong me, like dad did," Connor said while he shot Jude a look, asking for confidence. Jude shot Connor an assuring look back, which gave Connor that little more confidence that he needed.  
"Well, what is it?" Erin asked, and Connor could tell she was honestly curious.  
"Jude isn't just some friend of mine. He's my boyfriend," Connor said, looking down to the table, hoping his mother wouldn't have the same reaction as his father.  
"Ah, I see," she said.  
"I understand that this might be confusing, but I don't want you to get to know me in the wrong way. I don't want to pretend that I'm someone I'm not, only to reveal even later that I'm not. I want you to get to know me, not some fake me," Connor said.  
"I understand that, honey, I do. And I don't care if you are gay. That's one of the things your dad and I sometimes bickered about. Maybe your father is the biggest bigot I've ever met. But I don't care if you're gay. I want to be part of your life again. Besides, I think you and Jude make a cute couple," Erin said, and both Jude and Connor began to blush, hearing these sweet words from this semi-stranger.

When they'd finished dinner, Jude and Connor offered to do the dishes, and Erin went to bed, as she wanted her jetlag to be as minimal as possible, so she'd sleep early to reduce the time it took for her brain to adjust to the new time. While cleaning the dishes, Jude and Connor talked about their conversation with Erin.  
"I think it's great that she's so supportive," Jude said.  
"Yeah, she's so different from my father, it's weird they even got together in the first place," Connor said.  
"Well, we're not quite the same person either, we have a lot of differences! You like sports, I couldn't care less about it!" Jude said.  
"True… Hey, do you think we can tell people on school now? I mean, the only reason why I didn't want to was the possibility that somehow my dad might find out because he heard someone on school talk about it," Connor asked Jude.  
"Hmm, sure, it might be easier to just be ourselves on school too," Jude agreed, and with that, they settled that the next Monday, they'd tell some people on school. Their prediction was that it'd spread like wildfire when one person knew it, making it easier for them, as they didn't have to tell anybody else, only confirm.

Around half past nine, Jude said he'd go home and Connor walked him out. When they came to the front door, Connor laid his hands on Jude's shoulder and turned him around.  
"I love you Jude, and I want everyone to know that I'm proud to love you," Connor said.  
"I love you too, Connor, and I think you're very brave to tell your mother about us after you've just met her again after so many years," Jude replied and they kissed each other goodnight. When they broke the kiss, Jude turned around, opened the door and walked to his bike. He turned on the lights and rode off into the dark. Connor stood still at the open door, watching the boy he loved so much ride away, until eventually all he saw was a little red dot of Jude's backlight getting smaller and smaller.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Finally Ourselves (More Secrets Revealed)".


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:   
> Seeing as I don't get the feeling like this fiction is highly appreciated, I hereby announce that this fiction will not continue after chapter 14.  
> Since last week's update, I've had the disappointing count of views of 31. Furthermore, I haven't received any comments or reviews in a long time.  
> This is really demotivating for me as a writer, as I have spent a lot of time in writing this. In fact, I've already written until chapter 24, but as I get little to no motivation, I won't be posting anything after chapter 14. Chapter 14 has been my favourite to write so far, so I still want to post that one, but after that I'm through. If this fiction is not appreciated, I am not willing to waste time on it anymore. I thank you for your attention. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

CHAPTER 13 – FINALLY OURSELVES (MORE SECRETS REVEALED)

"I'm afraid," Jude said.  
"Of what?" Connor asked him.  
"Of the reactions we'll get," Jude answered.  
"Jude, I promise you that a vast majority will have no problems with it, I mean, everybody knows Lena's a lesbian and nobody has a problem with that!" Connor said.  
"Or maybe they do have a problem with it, but don't dare to say it because she's the vice-principal," Jude thought to have a point.  
"Yeah, like any teenager just does whatever the vice-principal says, that's not what teenagers are there for! Teenagers are there to revolt and be stubborn, not follow an authority figure! The fact that they do in this case, means they don't mind her being gay!" Connor said, knowing that, contrary to Jude, he actually did have a point.  
"Maybe you're right… What do I have to be scared of? I only got something, correction, someone to be proud of!" Jude said, and Connor looked at him in a way that Jude could only describe as intensely cute.  
"Shall we?" Connor asked.  
"We shall," Jude answered.

They stood up from their usual bench near the beach at their school, and looked at each other. Connor grabbed Jude's hand and just when he started walking away, Jude asked him to stop. When Connor questioningly looked at him, Jude closed his eyes and kissed Connor on his lips. It was only a small kiss, but just enough to give Jude a boost of confidence.  
"Now I'm ready," he said and the two of them walked to the entrance hand in hand. Between the bench and the picnic tables (which were roughly a hundred yards away from each other), they only got a few stares, but no confrontation yet. Jude and Connor didn't mind the stares, they proudly walked onwards, not bothered by the people looking at them. They didn't talk, they both wanted this experience to be their own, not wanting it to be ruined by talking. When they'd passed the picnic tables, they heard the first voice.

"Hey Stevens, what's that?" they heard and Connor looked where the voice came from. It was Daniel, Connor's teammate from the baseball team.  
"How do you mean?" Connor replied.  
"What are you doing?" Daniel asked.  
"Walking to class?" Connor played dumb, and Jude grinned at his boyfriends dorkiness.  
"No, I mean…" Daniel began, but was interrupted by Connor.  
"I know what you mean, I'm holding hands with my boyfriend, something wrong?" Connor asked him.  
"Oh, no, nothing, just wondering," Daniel muttered before backing off.  
"That went well," Connor whispered to Jude, who looked more confident now that the first reaction was kind of positive. They entered the school and were instantly surrounded by people, as the hallways were always crowded here at Anchor Beach. They got some more stares as they proceeded through the hallways. They heard some whispering, but didn't know if it was about them or not, but occasionally, they saw people whispering and pointing at them, so they knew that they were talked about.  
"You're so cute together!" One girl said to Jude, who thanked her and gave her a big smile.  
"I've always thought you and Jude were together," another girl said to Connor as she passed them, leaving Connor looking confused, but flattered. When they walked around the corner, Jude suddenly started to walk slower. Connor looked over and saw two boys standing with their backs against the lockers, not yet noticing them. Connor looked over to Jude to see his reaction, and he saw that Jude was determined to be himself, but at the same time nervous for the reaction of these particular two boys.

Flashback  
The bell rang. As Jude and Connor packed their bags, Connor couldn't help but notice the blue nail polish on Jude's fingers. He thought it was a little odd, but he liked that Jude felt comfortable to be himself. They were the last two to leave because Connor was telling Jude about a fish he and his dad had caught.  
"It was not!" Jude exclaimed, laughing, as the two walked out of the room.  
"I swear! It was a fifty-five pound white seabass, my dad weighed it. It was crazy big! Do you fish?" Connor said.  
"I've never even been on a boat," Jude said, apologetically, grabbing his backpack tight.  
"How did you grow up on a beach, but never get on a boat?" Connor asked, slightly amused, "You have to come next time my dad takes me out!"  
"Really?" Jude said, relieved that he finally had a friend. His first days of school had been quite lonely, and only Connor had made a move towards friendship now, so Connor asking him to come with his dad to go fishing made Jude happier than he'd ever been before.  
"Oh wait, I forgot my book," Connor said and he headed back into the classroom. Just as Connor had disappeared, two boys came walking towards Jude. They grabbed his hand and held it up high.  
"Nice nails," one of the boys said, while dropping Jude's arm, "Are you wearing a bra too?"  
"Why don't you guys just grow up?" Jude asked, just as Connor came back from the classroom, his book in his hand. They boy came closer and looked mad.  
"What did you just say?" he asked.  
Jude saw Connor standing in the doorway and that gave him confidence.  
"I said: grow up, idiot" Jude repeated himself. The boys didn't take this and pushed Jude against the lockers nearby. Connor looked worried, as the boy kept pushing Jude.  
"Who are you calling an idiot?" the boy asked Jude. Connor was just about to do step in when a teacher walked up to them.  
"What is going on here?" she asked, and when she clearly saw what happening, she stopped the fight.  
"Blake, Jeremy, principal's office, now," she commanded them.  
Jude shot one questioning look at Connor, who looked confused, and Jude walked away.

(*)

"Are you okay?" Connor asked.  
"Yeah, it's just that Blake and Jeremy are standing there," Jude said.  
"I saw it yeah, I still hate them for what they did to you on one of your first days here," Connor said.  
"The creepy part is that they're standing right where they pushed me against the lockers," Jude said.  
"I didn't even notice that, that's pretty coincidental," Connor said.  
"I'll just keep in mind what happened the next day," Jude said and his face brightened.

Flashback  
Jude walked out of the cafeteria, holding the paper bag containing his lunch. He searched outside for a place to eat, but almost each table was occupied. To his right, he saw a table where a two people were sitting, so the table was mostly empty. As he sat down, the two people noticed the nail polish he was still wearing, as he'd had a talk with Lena about accepting himself and Jude decided that he liked the nail polish, so he continued to wear it. Upon noticing the nail polish, the two students stood up and walked away, leaving Jude sitting lonely. He couldn't help but feeling a little heartbroken when they walked away, but he opened his lunch bag. Just when he opened it, he saw a figure in the corner of his eye. The figure was wearing a black/white blouse and he was carrying a tray with his lunch. The figure sat down at the table. Jude looked up and saw Connor sitting there with a smile on his face. Jude looked at him while he unpacked his lunch. Connor took his sandwich and held it tight. Only now, Jude noticed Connor's hands, and his hands stopped. Connor's nails were painted in the same shade of blue as Jude's. Connor smiled at Jude, and as Jude took his first bite, it dawned on him that Connor had done this in solidarity to him. A big smile formed on his face as he couldn't keep his eyes off Connor's nails and he realized that he really made a friend. Maybe even a best friend.

(*)

The two walked onwards and just before they reached the place where Blake and Jeremy were standing, Jude took a deep breath and looked at Connor to regain his confidence. They walked over and their approach did not go unnoticed.  
"Hey, nail polish boy!" Blake shouted, trying to embarrass Jude, who didn't give in.  
"Oh, hey Blake," he said nonchalantly.  
"I see you've found a fellow fag in douchebag Stevens?" Jeremy tried.  
"I wouldn't call him a fag or a douchebag, but nice of you to acknowledge us as a couple, thank you," Jude said politely, causing some onlookers to laugh at Blake and Jeremy, who didn't like how this turned.  
"I will show you how I acknowledge you," Blake said, pulling back his arm, while making a fist of his hand.  
"I wouldn't do that, young man," Timothy said, and Jude, however calm he might have looked, was relieved to have his English teacher there to help him out. Blake lowered his arm and looked at Timothy.  
"Go to the principal's office, Blake, and tell Monte why you wanted to do this," Timothy commanded him, and Blake walked away.  
"You guys look cute together," Timothy said while winking at Connor and Jude before he went off again.  
"Well, that went okay!" Jude said, and he and Connor walked to their science class.

At the end of the day, Jude and Connor walked back over the grounds of the school to their usual bench. They'd just sat down, when a boy came up to them. He was wearing a black shirt, black shorts and a black cap. Neither of the boys knew this guy, but the guy seemed to recognize them.  
"Okay, wait wait, so you two are gay for each other?" he asked.  
"Yeah, so what? Got something to say about it?" Connor asked him, not liking the tone in which the boy asked them that question. The boy looked slightly upset, figuring he had hurt Connor and Jude.  
"No man, it's just… all good, I heard, and I thought…" he began, but Connor interrupted him.  
"And you thought what?" Connor shot at the boy.  
"Nothing man, it's cool," the boy said apologetically.  
"Then get out of my face," Connor shot at him, and the boy walked away.  
"You didn't have to be so rude about it," Jude said to Connor.  
"I just didn't like his tone, it sounded attacking, and I don't want anyone attacking you like Blake almost did," Connor said, while he took Jude's hand.  
"I love that you're so protective of me, but please, he seemed worried to have hurt us," Jude said.  
"I guess you're right, wait a minute," Connor said as he let go of Jude's hand and ran towards the boy who had just walked away.  
"Hey, wait up," he shouted, and the boy turned around. When Connor had reached the boy, he apologized.  
"Hey, sorry that I was so rude earlier, I didn't mean to. It's just that Jude almost got beat up today because of it, so I don't want him to get hurt," Connor said.  
"Hey, I understand, it's no problem really. I understand. How long have you guys been together?" the boy asked.  
"About a year now," Connor replied.  
"And you've hidden it from the school for a whole year?" the boy asked again, while the two of them walked back to Jude.  
"Yeah, we did, I even held it secret for my dad all this time. I just came out to him last Friday," Connor replied.  
"No way, you've hidden your relation for a year? How did you do that? And why?" the boy asked as they sat down next to Jude.  
"Well, my dad used to beat me up every other day, so I didn't really feel like telling him, Jude's house was my safe place, I felt loved there. Lena and Stef are really nice to me," Connor explained.  
"Lena as in Lena Adams-Foster? The vice-principal?" the boy asked.  
"Yeah, I'm Jude Adams-Foster, Lena's son," Jude said.  
"Cool," the boy said, "But why did you decide to tell your dad? I mean, if he beats you up so often?" the boy asked.  
"He got arrested for it last week. I told him at the end of his hearing, when he was guarded by police officers and just about to go to jail. My mum came over from Minnesota after the hearing, she arrived two days ago now and is fully supportive of me and Jude," Connor replied.  
"That's great! Well, it's great to have talked to you guys and made up our little fight earlier, you guys are great!" the boy said, and just as he was about to walk away, there was one question that popped into Jude's mind.  
"What's your name?" he asked.  
"Tom Price," he said while walking on.  
"Good kid," Connor said softly, so only Jude could hear it.  
"He's okay," Jude said, a little jealous that Connor might like Tom, but instantly thinking that Connor only loved him and that he shouldn't be so silly to think otherwise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Our Perfect Night".


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note: So I've decided not to stop yet, thank you for all the encouraging messages, it really made me feel better. To explain, I'm in a bad mental position at the moment, and I get the feeling like I'm a nothing etc. very easily. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have leashed that out on you guys. I will keep on posting, but I decided that due to a lack of time, this story will come to an end earlier than I initially planned to. This means that instead of the initial 31 chapters, there will be 24 chapters. I started writing chapter 24 a few weeks ago and I still didn't come round to continuing writing, so I'm sorry for that, but I just don't have the time.  
> Anyway, this was my favourite chapter to write, so I hope you'll enjoy it as well!

CHAPTER 14 – OUR PERFECT NIGHT

"Oh Judicorn, you look amazing," Mariana said.  
"Do I look good enough?" Jude asked her insecurely.  
"Jude, please, you look absolutely stunning, if it weren't for that you were my brother, I'd date you!" Mariana said.  
"No thanks, you're too girly for me, I prefer something manlier," Jude said, smirking at his own remark.  
"Anyways, you look great Jude, you really do. Connor will be breathless when he sees you like that," Mariana said, reassuring Jude.  
"I hope so," Jude said, turning around before the mirror to get a full picture of himself. He was wearing a new suit, bought for this occasion, which was fully black. His tie was pink, but just dark enough to be visible above his white plain blouse. He looked at Mariana, who smiled at him.  
"Here, let me take a picture, good memory for later!" She said, and Jude posed so Mariana could take the picture. Jude checked himself out in the mirror once before Mariana took him by the hand. The two then went downstairs and when they arrived in the living room, they were greeted by a shriek of excitement.  
"AAAH, you look so handsome!" Stef cried while she walked over to Jude.  
"Thank you mom," Jude said, shyly looking at his hands.  
"My little baby grows old, and look at him! He's drop-dead gorgeous!" Lena added.  
"Mama…" Jude said, getting more shy at their remarks.  
"They're right, Jude, you look marvellous!" Callie brought in, and Jude reddened a little, brought to embarrassment by his sister's words. Of all these people, Callie's opinion meant most to him, as Callie was his half-sister, and he had known her for his whole life. They had gone through the foster system together, and had always pulled each other up when one of them was feeling down.  
"Thanks," he stammered.  
"Moms, have you talked about my curfew yet? I mean… I kind of want this evening to be great for Connor, and I want it to last as long as possible," Jude asked.  
"Your mama and I talked, and it's okay if you are home by midnight. Just this once!" Stef said, and Jude thanked them.

Lena walked Jude out, watched him grab his bike and looked after him when he rode away. It was just before five o'clock in the afternoon, so Jude had to hurry. He wanted to buy some roses for Connor first, and the store closed at five. Just before time, Jude arrived at the shop and he bought a little bouquet of roses. He was careful to pick the most beautiful ones out of the huge bucket that stood almost in the middle of the store. He didn't want to show up at Connor's house with a bunch of withered flowers, so he made sure he chose the ones that looked most fresh. He had just picked out a few flowers when he hears a voice from behind him. He looked up and saw a lady standing there.  
"You look good, going on a date?" the saleswoman asked him.  
"Yes ma'am," Jude said as politely as he could.  
"I see! Chivalry isn't dead yet! I bet she's really happy to have you," the lady said to him.  
"Actually, it's a he," Jude said, content that he finally could say this to a random stranger.  
"Pardon me?" the lady asked.  
"My date is a boy. In fact, my boyfriend," Jude said.  
"I see, in that case, I bet he's really happy to have you," the lady said, smiling.  
"I hope so," Jude said, slightly laughing.  
When Jude was done collecting the flowers, the lady accompanied him to the counter so that Jude could pay.  
"It'd be ten dollars please," the saleswoman said and Jude gave her the money. As he walked out of the store, the lady called after him.  
"Good luck! I bet he will faint in disbelief of how good you look!" she said, and Jude smirked at that thought. He cycled to Connors house and came there at ten past five. Jude straightened his hair and then rang the doorbell. Connor's mother opened the door and for a moment, she didn't recognize Jude.  
"Wow, Jude, you look amazing," she whispered, making sure Connor couldn't hear it upstairs.  
"Thank you, Erin" Jude said while he stepped into the house. He sat down on the couch as Erin walked over to the stairs and called out for Connor, saying Jude had arrived. Jude sat on the couch, holding the bouquet of roses before his stomach. It took a minute before he heard footsteps on the stairs. Connor appeared at the door of the living room, and almost immediately, his jaw fell open. Wrinkles appeared above Connor's eyes and the shoes he was holding in his hand dropped to the floor.  
"Wow… Jude… you look… pulchritudinous," Connor stammered. Jude giggled at his boyfriend's dorkiness.  
"Thanks… happy birthday!" Jude said, handing Connor the roses.  
"They are amazing! Boy, I don't deserve you," Connor said, still startled at Jude's appearance. Connor regained his mind, looked at his own clothes and reddened.  
"Jude… you're so much better dressed than I am! You said I had to go casually formal!" Connor exclaimed.  
"If I said you'd had to suit up, it would've given away the surprise wouldn't it?" Jude said, laughing.  
"Hey, you guys better get going!" Erin said, and Jude agreed with her. The boys walked towards the door, Connor picking up his shoes and putting them on. Connor wanted to take his own bike, but Jude stopped him.  
"No way, you don't have to cycle, you're going on the back of my bike!" Jude said.  
"Jude? Are you sure you can hold me? I mean, can you cycle with someone on the back?" Connor said.  
"Course I can, you don't think I'd risk letting you fall, would you? I practised all week with Mariana, Callie and even Jesus and mom!" Jude said. Connor smirked at the thought of Jude cycling with Stef on the back, but sat down on Jude's luggage carrier. Jude cycled away and Connor was surprised with how easily Jude managed to do it. Erin was looking through the window, smiling at the two boys as they disappeared out of sight.

Connor flung his arms around Jude's waist, so he could hold on to him, as Jude went pretty fast.  
"Where are we going?" Connor asked him, and Jude replied with laughter.  
"Wait and see," he said. As they cycled near the San Diego River, Connor looked at it and it seemed way more beautiful than ever. It's probably just the moment, he thought, I bet everything looks great to me now Jude has planned this whole evening for me. He's so sweet.  
"You don't happen to know songs about rivers, do you?" Connor asked. Jude thought deeply and found a song he knew.  
"I actually do," Jude said, and Connor asked him to sing it for him. Jude stopped the bike, gasping breath for some time before he started to sing.

"Down by the river by the boats  
Where everybody goes to be alone  
Where you won't see any rising sun  
Down to the river we will run

When by the water we drink to the dregs  
Look at the stones on the riverbed  
I can tell from your eyes  
You've never been by the riverside

Down by the water the riverbed  
Somebody calls you somebody says  
Swim with the current and float away  
Down by the river everyday

Oh my God, I see  
How everything is torn in the river deep  
And I don't know why I go the way  
Down by the riverside

When that old river runs past your eyes  
To wash off the dirt on the riverside  
Go to the water so very near  
The river will be your eyes and ears

I walk to the borders on my own  
Fall in the water just like a stone  
Chilled to the marrow in them bones  
Why do I go here all alone?

Oh my God, I see  
How everything is torn in the river deep  
And I don't know why I go the way  
Down by the riverside

Oh my God, I see  
How everything is torn in the river deep  
And I don't know why I go the way  
Down by the riverside

Down by the riverside  
Down by the riverside"

"You never fail to make me calm," Connor joked as he kissed Jude.  
"We must go on now, otherwise we'll be late," Jude said, looking at his watch. Connor sat down again and Jude went off, going even faster, so Connor had to grip him tightly. They arrived at the restaurant a few minutes early, but decided to go in anyway.  
"Jude… This place is luxurious, we must be at the wrong place," Connor said.  
"Nope, we aren't, this is the place. I went here last week to make a reservation," Jude smiled, "only the best for you, my love," he said, kissing Connor. The two went in and Jude arranged their table with the head waiter. They sat down and Connor looked around.  
"Alright, now I really don't feel properly dressed. Look around you! Everybody is wearing tuxedos! Even that infant over there!" Connor pointed, and Jude couldn't help but laugh as he indeed saw a one-year-old toddler wearing a tuxedo onesie.  
"Hey, I don't think anybody cares, you look good enough, believe me," Jude said, squeezing Connor's hand above the table, "Really, I think they'd be more shocked by sight of two boys on a date than one of them not wearing a tuxedo," Jude finished, chuckling at Connor. This reassured Connor, and he became a little more relaxed. A waiter came and handed them the menus, while asking them what they wanted to drink. They both figured that a place like this wouldn't have a coke or something like that, so they settled on water, as they weren't old enough yet to order wine. They both gave their order to the waiter and waited as Connor kept telling Jude that all of this wasn't necessary.  
"But you like it," Jude teased him.  
"I do, but… you really didn't have to do this!" Connor replied.  
"I felt like I had to, you've made me happier than I could ever have hoped for. Besides, I figured you'd need a little break from all the bad thing that've happened last few weeks, I figured this might make up for it," Jude answered as he laid his hand on Connor's, above the table.  
"That's sweet of you, really, I love you," Connor said.

The waiter came with their starters, so they quickly let go of each other's hands, and they began eating their food. They had both ordered the same, as Jude had waited for Connor to order and then order exactly the same, to have the same experience of the night. They ate their carpaccio silently and only when they were finished, Connor praised the food.  
"This is the best carpaccio I have ever had!" he said, causing Jude to smile in satisfaction. He's enjoying it! Jude thought, happy that he could make his boyfriend enjoy this night. The waiter came to collect their plates and announced that their main course would be served in five minutes. Jude politely thanked the waiter and he and Connor began talking again.  
"Everything about this place looks fancy!" Connor started.  
"I hoped you'd like it," Jude said, expectantly looking at Connor.  
"I do! I love it!" Connor exclaimed, lovingly staring at Jude. "But the best sight of all is the sight that I have right now," he said as he stared at Jude's eyes. Then they just silently looked at each other, and Jude felt himself falling in love even more. It was amazing how they could just sit there looking at each other without saying a word and still be completely satisfied. They were brought back to the world by a small cough.  
"I'm sorry Sirs, your caviar," the waiter said, and Jude and Connor looked up, both reddening a little, embarrassed that they didn't hear the waiter coming. The waiter lightly smiled as he placed the plates in front of them.

When the waiter had gone away, Connor smelled his food.  
"Smell it, Jude, it smells amazing!" he said.  
"I've never smelled anything quite like this!" Jude said as he brought the first fork full of caviar to his mouth.  
"Hmmm," he said as he shoved it in his mouth. "It's delicious," he added when he had swallowed it all. They ate quietly, and when they were done, the waiter came to collect their plates. He asked if they wanted dessert, and Connor looked questioningly at Jude.  
"Oh well, why not?" he said, teasing Connor. Connor ordered chocolate cake with cream, and so did Jude. Not long after, two big slices of chocolate cake with cream stood before them and they started eating it.  
"Twis iws gwood!" Connor said, his mouth full of chocolate.  
"Connor, behave yourself! We're still in the restaurant!" Jude said, shocked.  
"Sorry, I got caught up in this chocolaty goodness," Connor said after he had swallowed. Jude looked around, but luckily, they hadn't caught stares. They ate their chocolate cake and when they were done, Jude summoned the waiter to get the bill. When the water brought it, Connor proposed to split the bill, but Jude insisted.  
"No Connor, it's on me, I asked you out, I picked the restaurant, I pay the bill. It's your birthday!" Jude said.  
"But it's quite much!" Connor said.  
"You haven't even looked at the bill! I didn't give you the chance to!" Jude protested.  
"Alright, that's true," Connor admitted.  
"I pay, and that's final!" Jude said, and he walked over to the counter to pay. When he was done, he summoned Connor and they walked outside. It was eight o'clock, and Connor didn't want to think about how much Jude had already spent on this evening, and how many more there was to come.

"Come on, step up the luggage carrier, we got somewhere to go!" Jude said cheerfully. Connor walked over to Jude's bike and stepped up. Jude cycled away, back into the city. Connor didn't even ask where they were going, as he knew Jude wouldn't say it anyway. They cycled for about ten minutes, when Jude stopped in front of the movie theatre. Jude had picked a movie that he knew Connor had wanted to watch for a long time. They went inside at Jude's expenses and Jude said that Connor had to stay where he was. Connor did, and Jude ran off in the direction of the bathrooms. This was to distract Connor, as Jude was really going to the popcorn stand. He ordered two small boxes of salty popcorn and two large cokes. He then walked back over to Connor, who was completely surprised to see Jude carrying it.  
"Jude! You really don't…" he began, but he was interrupted by Jude.  
"No movie without popcorn! Don't you remember that agreement we made?" Jude said, laughing at Connor. They went inside and took the seats in the back, so that they were directly in front of the screen, the best seats available. Jude had reserved these seats for Connor, as he knew these were Connor's favourite seats, but were hard to get, because it seemed like everyone wanted to sit there. The movie began and Connor placed his box of popcorn in front of him. He then took Jude's box of popcorn out of Jude's hands and placed it in front of Jude. He took Jude's hand and placed both their hands on the armrest. They watched the movie like that, and they didn't let go until end credits had finished. They then walked out, still holding hands and threw away their empty popcorn boxes and beakers. Jude led Connor out of the theatre and they went back to Jude's bike. It was half past ten, and Connor figured they'd go home now. Jude didn't say anything, but cycled further into the city. Then he took a turn Connor didn't expect, further away from either of their houses.  
"Jude… where are we going? I thought we were going home?" Connor asked.  
"Not yet," Jude said, and Connor was puzzled. Jude cycled into the park and when he had found a quiet spot, he stopped his bike and parked it. Connor stood up and so did Jude.

"What are we doing here?" Connor asked.  
"Well, seeing your posture, I'd say we are standing," Jude joked, and Connor nervously giggled.  
"We're going to lie here in the grass for a little while," Jude said, and he sat down. Connor sat down next to him.  
"But not yet," Jude said as he saw that Connor was just about to lie down in the grass. Jude grabbed his backpack and Connor couldn't help but be curious.  
"I've been wondering what's in there the whole evening now! Am I finally gonna find out?" Connor asked.  
"Yep, right now," Jude said. He opened the bag and took out a bottle of wine.  
"Jude, we're too young to drink!" Connor exclaimed.  
"Moms allowed us to drink half the bottle, and they arranged it with your mother too," Jude said as he took two wineglasses. He poured wine in both glasses, and gave one to Connor. He then raised his glass and toasted on Connor.  
"On your 15th birthday!" He said. Connor raised his glass too.  
"On our love!" he said and they both took a sip. They had to get used to the taste at first, but they both liked it. When both had finished their first glass, Jude poured them another glass and he decided that afterwards, they wouldn't drink anymore, as the bottle was almost half empty. Before either of them took another sip, Jude took something else from the bag. It was quite a big box, and it was wrapped.  
"Jude, please, after this whole evening, you still got a present for me?" Connor asked.  
"Of course, no party without presents! Open it!" Jude exclaimed. Connor opened it and found that Jude had gotten him new baseball gloves, something he really needed, as his old pair were old and worn out.  
"Thank you," Connor said, and took Jude's hand.  
"I've got another present for you," Jude said.  
"Oh please no," Connor began, but he was interrupted by Jude's lips as Jude placed them on Connor's. Jude slightly opened his mouth and Connor did too. Jude slipped his tongue inside Connor's mouth and found Connor's tongue. Connor, surprised by this, pulled his tongue back in shock, but decided it was alright and that he liked it, so he slowly pushed his tongue back to Jude's and licked his boyfriend's tongue. The two had never felt closer to each other, and both of the boys sunk deeper into the kiss. Connor cupped Jude's face in his hands, and Jude had places his hand on the back of Connor's head. When Jude finally pulled back, Connor was a little shy at first.  
"That was our first French kiss, wasn't it?" he asked.  
"It was," Jude said, and his eyes lit up. Connor saw this, and he pulled Jude closer for another one. They eventually broke the kiss and Jude lied back. Connor turned around so he could lie with his head on Jude's stomach. Jude ran his hands through Connor's hair and they were peaceful like that.  
"Thank you for this amazing evening," Connor said, honestly grateful.  
"No problem at all," Jude said softly as he petted Connor's hair.  
"You didn't have to do all of this," Connor said, apologetically, afraid that he had given off a vibe that made Jude think he did have to.  
"I know," Jude said, and Connor was relieved, "but I did it anyway".  
"Why?" Connor asked.  
"Because I love you," Jude responded. Jude and Connor had said that to each other often, but this time, Connor felt like it was special. He thought about how lucky he was to have found Jude. He felt truly lucky to have found the love of his life. Jude was everything for him, and tonight, Jude had made Connor feel like he was Jude's love of his life too, and Connor couldn't love Jude more, after he had given Connor this feeling.  
"I love you too," he whispered, and without Connor knowing, Jude got a huge smile on his face, happy to hear those words.  
"You're so cute," Jude said, and this time, Connor's face broke into a big smile.  
"Jude, do you want to stay with me forever?" Connor asked.  
"Right now?" Jude asked.  
"How do you mean?" Connor asked, a little worried.  
"Well, right now, I really want to stay with you forever, but I can't look into the future," Jude answered.  
"I hope you stay with what you want now," Connor said, kissing Jude's hand.  
"I hope so too," Jude softly answered and the two of them stared at the sky, both feeling the love flowing through their bodies, hoping this would last forever.

When it was ten to twelve, Jude stood up and helped Connor get on his feet. The two of them then headed over to Jude's bike and they cycled to Connor's house.  
"I wish this night would never end," Connor said.  
"Me too, but that would cost me a lot of money," Jude said jokingly.  
"Hey, I could've paid, but you insisted!" Connor protested.  
"I know, and if we had more time, we would've done even more," Jude said.  
"Jude, please," Connor began.  
"Connor, I'm happy to spend my money on you. Remember the first time you came over? You noticed how little stuff I had. Now that I do have stuff, I want to share it, and there is nobody on whom I'd rather spend my money than you," Jude said, and Connor reddened.  
"Thank you," he said as he laid his head on Jude's back, sniffing Jude's scent.

They arrived at Connor's house, and Jude rang the doorbell. Erin opened the door.  
"Oh, look at them, they're back! Thank you for bringing him home safely, dear, do you want to come in?" she asked Jude, but Jude politely declined, saying he had to be home by twelve.  
"Well, goodnight to you then dear, and thanks again!" Erin said. Jude gave Connor a long kiss goodnight to end their amazing night, and Erin almost melted seeing it. Connor and Erin went inside as Jude walked back to his bike, and just before the door slammed shut, he could hear Erin talk to Connor.  
"Oh, you guys are so cute together! I am so happy for you two that you've found each other! And you picked the right boy too! Great manners he has! I really like him, Connor," Erin said.  
"I like him too mum, no, I love him," Jude heard Connor say, and a smile formed on his face as he heard Connor say those words again.  
Jude cycled home and at twelve o'clock precisely, he opened the door. Stef and Lena were waiting for him in the living room. When he came there, he was greeted by the two.  
"So, how was your evening?" Lena asked.  
"It was AM-A-ZING," Jude said.  
"Tell us everything! Max detail, go!" Stef said enthusiastically.  
Jude laughed and told them what they had done. Stef couldn't help but give comments sometimes ("aww, that's so cute", "That's so sweet!", "YOU HAD YOUR FIRST FRENCH KISS? HOW WAS IT?"), which made Jude laugh, as he found it sweet that Stef and Lena wanted to be part of his experience so badly. It made him feel wanted in this family, and he liked that feeling after so many foster homes. After he told them the story, he went upstairs, leaving the bottle of wine behind. When he lied down in bed, he thought about the events of the evening, and smiling, he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The song Jude sings to Connor is called "Riverside" by Agnes Obel.  
> The next chapter is called "Partytime".


	15. Chapter 15

CHAPTER 15 – PARTYTIME

"Connor, are you coming?" Jude called from down the stairs. Connor was in his room getting ready, while Jude waited for him.  
"Yeah, I'll be down in a minute," Connor answered. Jude sighed and went back into the living room. He'd been waiting for Connor nearly fifteen minutes now, and Connor had already twice said that 'he'd be down in a minute'. He sat down and Erin walked in.  
"Are you sure you don't want a drink, sweetie?" she asked him.  
"Well, I guess a glass of water wouldn't hurt," Jude answered and Erin went into the kitchen to get it for him. When she came back and handed him the water, Jude thanked her and took a sip. Honestly, what is taking him so long? We're only going to Justin's party, not some high-class gala or something, Jude thought. Finally, Connor came down and into the living room.  
"You ready?" he asked Jude. Jude looked at his watch before he replied.  
"Yeah, like an hour ago," Jude said and Connor looked embarrassed.  
"Sorry, I was doing something, and I didn't quite wanted to quit," he admitted.  
"And that's why you let me wait for twenty minutes?" Jude said, a little disappointed.  
"Yeah, well… sorry, I didn't mean to," Connor replied. Jude took two more big gulps from the glass of water, emptying it before he walked into the kitchen and placed the glass in the dishwasher.  
"Oh, you really don't have to clean it up, Jude, I could've done that!" Erin said.  
"I know, but at home I have to do it, so yeah, I'm used to it," Jude said while smiling at Erin. He walked back into the living room and walked out with Connor. They took their bikes, and Connor couldn't help but laugh a little.  
"Just a week ago, you wouldn't let me ride my own bike and insisted on me going on the back of yours, what happened to that?" he asked.  
"Sorry, it's not your birthday now, is it?" Jude replied, smirking. They got on their bikes and rode away.

It was not far to Justin's house. Justin was a friend of Connor and Jude's and they often spent the breaks with him and some others. They parked their bikes when they arrived and went inside, expecting to find a couple of people there, but were surprised to see that the whole house was full with people.  
"Hey, Jude, Connor!" Justin exclaimed when they walked in.  
"Hey Justin… I didn't expect so many people here," Connor said, looking to Jude who looked equally as surprised.  
"Yeah, me neither actually, some people apparently brought other people, but hey, the more the merrier right?" Justin said enthusiastically.  
"I guess, yeah," Connor said doubtfully.  
"C'mon man, loosen up a little, have a beer!" Justin said while holding up a cup for Connor.  
"I don't think I should do that," Connor muttered and Jude looked at him.  
"Connor, please don't…" Jude said.  
"Believe me, I won't," Connor promised, "I'm just gonna check in on Daniel over there," Connor said.  
"Alright, I'm gonna see how Alex is doing," Jude answered and they parted ways.

"Hey Jude, how're you going?" Alex said as Jude approached.  
"Hey, I'm good, actually, how is everything going in your world?" Jude asked.  
"Great, great! How's the Conboy?" Alex asked, and Jude looked a little sour at that name.  
"He's good," Jude said, and a smile formed on his face.  
"What's with the smile, dude? You in love or something?" Alex asked.  
"Oh right, we haven't seen each other in quite a while, we came out two weeks ago, we're a couple," Jude explained.  
"Ah, you and Connor are boyfriends?" Alex asked.  
"Yep," Jude answered.  
"Awesome! How long have you been going on now?" Alex wondered.  
"More than a year, actually," Jude answered, laughing as he saw that Alex almost chocked on his sip of beer.  
"More than a year? And you've only come out two weeks ago?" Alex almost shouted.  
"Well, moms knew, Connor's dad didn't, so yeah, we didn't tell it on school either as Connor was afraid that his father might find out because of people on school," Jude answered.  
"Then what made you come out?" Alex asked.  
"Well, let's just say we had some complications that have been resolved. Well… at least delayed for five years," Jude answered.  
"I see, you look great by the way!" Alex complimented Jude.  
"Thanks, you don't look to bad yourself either!" Jude said, and Alex slightly frowned.  
"You don't start hitting on me now, do you?" he asked.  
"Oh no, I wouldn't dare with Connor around," Jude laughed.  
"Why don't you have a beer?" Daniel said as he came standing by them.  
"No thanks. Wait, wasn't Connor with you?" Jude asked him.  
"He was, but he's gone to some other guy, drinking beer with him," Daniel said.  
"Excuse me," Jude said as he walked away.

Connor, where are you? You're not telling me you broke your promise. God I'm going nuts, Jude thought. He walked around the whole house, also checking the upstairs floors. He couldn't find Connor, so he walked back into the living room, where he eventually found Connor. He walked over to him and looked as angry as he could.  
"CONNOR!" he shouted, and Connor quickly looked up, and Jude saw a hint of embarrassment and guilt in his eyes.  
"What on earth are you doing?" Jude said.  
"Dancing," Connor said, which was odd, as Connor was sitting on a couch.  
"Connor, you're not dancing, tell me, how many beers did you drink already?" Jude asked.  
"Around five," some guy that Jude didn't know answered, as he saw the puzzlement in Connor's face. Jude grabbed Connor's arm and dragged him outside, away from the others. Connor couldn't walk straight anymore, so Jude had to help him keep upright.  
"Connor you promised me you wouldn't drink!" Jude said, looking disappointed.  
"I'm sorry Jude, I had a good time," Connor mumbled, almost inaudible from drunkenness.  
"Why did you drink? You can have a good time without drinking! After all, you're fifteen! The legal drinking age is twenty-one!" Jude exclaimed, a slight hint of worry in his voice.  
"They were asking me over and over, and I felt bad for declining each time, so eventually I took one, and then another and another," Connor said, giggling.  
"Connor, I love you, but please never do it again, especially when they're pushing you have to decline!" Jude said.  
"You love me?" Connor said.  
"Yes, Connor, I love you," Jude said.  
"Eww, don't be so gross," Connor said, and Jude felt an ache in his stomach.  
"What do you mean?" Jude asked.  
"You're gay?" Connor asked.  
"Yeah… I'm your boyfriend," Jude said, feeling weird.  
"Haha, you wish! See that girl there? She's hot! HEY HONEY!" Connor shouted to a random girl walking by. A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts, Jude thought, what has happened to my Connor? Could it be just the booze? Does he have an extreme reaction to booze? Does he forget everything about himself when he drinks? Connor bellowed on to girls on the street, who all ignored him.  
"Connor, you're talking like your dad," Jude said, hoping to regain Connor.  
"My dad? I'm nothing like my dad! Where is he? I want to beat him up so bad that he won't be able to move for a long time!" Connor shouted.  
"Connor, your father is out of your reach! He's in prison, don't you remember?" Jude tired.  
"Remember? My dad in prison? Really? Haha, that's great!" Connor laughed. Apparently it is the booze, Jude thought, the real Connor would know that is father was in prison. And that he's my boyfriend. This thought comforted Jude a little more.  
"Can we go inside again?" Connor asked Jude, "I'm getting cold".  
"No, we won't go inside. We're going home," Jude decided, but he figured that Connor couldn't cycle, as he couldn't even stand up straight without support.  
"I don't want to go home!" Connor bellowed, and Jude felt himself going deaf.  
"You should have thought about that before you got so drunk," Jude said to him as he took out his phone.  
Justin, sorry for saying it like this, but we're going home. Connor's got drunk and can't even remember things about himself. We'll see you at school Monday. Jude texted to Justin, before dialling Erin.  
"Erin Stevens speaking," he heard on the other side.  
"Hey Erin, it's Jude. Could you come and pick us up?" Jude asked.  
"Oh, did something happen?" Erin asked and her voice sounded worried.  
"Yeah, well, Connor got drunk, and he can't stand up straight, nor can he remember anything about himself," Jude said.  
"I'll be there in five minutes," Erin said, and she hung up the phone.

Jude unlocked their bikes and placed them on the pavement near the street, and helped Connor up and together they walked to the sidewalk. Five minutes later, Erin came around the corner. Together with Jude, she loaded the bikes in the trunk and they placed Connor in the back of the car. Jude sat down on the passenger seat and they drove off, not speaking a word. The only sound that could be heard was Connor jabbering to himself as the alcohol started to kick in more, now also affecting his speech. When they arrived at Connor's house, they helped Connor get out of the car and upstairs.  
"He needs a shower," Erin said.  
"He can't even stand up straight, how do you suppose he does that?" Jude asked.  
"We could sit him down on a stool," Erin suggested.  
"He'd fall off," Jude said, and Erin admitted that it wasn't such a good idea.  
"A sponge bath it is then…" Erin said.  
"Yeah, I suppose, I'll go away for a while then," Jude said, and he started to walk to the door.  
"Jude, I think that in the end, he's more comfortable with you doing it, I mean, I'm just a semi-stranger that just walked back into his life, and he's known you for a long time now, you should do it, it would be more comfortable for him," Erin said and Jude agreed. Erin walked out of the bathroom. Jude helped Connor stand up straight and stripped him of his clothes, only leaving Connor's undies on. He then sat him down on the bathroom floor, so that Connor couldn't fall down hard. He walked over to the dresser and found a washcloth. He put it around his hand and made it wet. He brought it to Connor's back who shuddered.  
"Sorry Connor, but you need to be washed," Jude said as he started rubbing Connor's back. When he had wetted Connor's body, he walked over to the shower and fetched the shower gel. He let some of it drip on the cloth and closed the bottle again. He rubbed Connor clean and afterwards he washed it off with a new washcloth. He then helped Connor get in his pyjamas and led him to his bed. Before he lied Connor down, he made Connor drink a few glasses of water, to reduce the effects of the hangover the following morning.  
"You'd better sleep off your drunkenness," Jude said to him as he tucked him in. Connor grabbed the sheets with his hands and made a satisfied sound. He then dozed off. Jude stayed by his bed for ten more minutes before he pressed a kiss on Connor's forehead and went downstairs.

"He's asleep," Jude said as he came into the living room, where Erin was waiting.  
"Good, does he smell better?" She asked.  
"He doesn't reek of alcohol anymore, so that's good, and I gave him some water so that the hangover will be less tomorrow," Jude said.  
"Will you please explain to me what happened?" Erin asked.  
"I wasn't there myself, but I'll tell you as good as possible," Jude said, "We were just inside when someone offered him a beer, he declined and I made him promise that he wouldn't drink. He did and said he was going to check in on Daniel, who is a friend of ours. I went to talk to Alex, another friend of ours. After a while, Daniel joined us, and I asked him where Connor was, he said that Connor was drinking with some other guys whom I didn't know. I went to search him, and eventually found him. By that time, he'd already guzzled down around five beers, or so one of the guys said, in about five minutes. I took him outside and he was completely away from this earth. He didn't know things about himself anymore, he even called me gross when I told him I was his boyfriend, and he wouldn't believe that he was gay himself too," Jude said and his voice broke. Erin laid her hand on Jude's back to comfort him.  
"He started shouting at girls how hot they were and I made him shut up. He then started talking about how he wanted to see Adam to beat him up, when I told him that Adam was in prison, he talked victoriously, as if he didn't know it already. I then texted Justin that we were going and then called you. The rest you know," Jude finished his story.  
"Well, thank you for taking such good care of him, even after he hurt you like that," Erin said.  
"No problem, I love him, and I think he was just numbed by the alcohol, he didn't remember anything," Jude said.  
"You want to sleep over? Then you can talk it out with Connor first thing tomorrow," Erin asked him.  
"I'd like that, let me call moms," Jude said and he took his phone.

"Stef Adams-Foster here," Jude heard through the phone.  
"Hey mom, is it okay if I spend the night at Connor's? Connor got drunk and I want to be there for him to talk to him first thing tomorrow, as he kind of hurt me," Jude asked.  
"Oh my God, nothing bad I hope?" Stef asked.  
"No, he just didn't remember me being his boyfriend and started calling out to girls," Jude said.  
"It's alright, you got everything you need there or do I need to bring some stuff?" Stef asked.  
"I'm okay, I can borrow one of Connor's pyjamas, and I have a toothbrush here, so I'm good," Jude answered.  
"Alright, see you tomorrow then, sleep well love," Stef said, and Jude said goodnight too.  
It wasn't time for Jude to go to sleep yet, so he watched television with Erin, which wasn't as awkward as Jude had thought. He liked Erin and Erin liked to spend time with her son's boyfriend, so the two talked a lot about what happened on television, commenting on everything characters on the show did. Around ten Jude got tired and said goodnight to Erin and disappeared upstairs. He walked into the guestroom and sat down on the bed, reflecting on what had happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Hungover".


	16. Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16 – HUNGOVER

Jude had a hard time sleeping, as he felt bad about what had happened the evening before. He just couldn't fall asleep, thinking about what Connor had said. He still heard Connor's voice echoing through his head. Haha, you wish! See that girl there? She's hot! HEY HONEY! Eventually, he fell asleep, but he didn't sleep well. He woke up early, and groggily he sat upright. He looked at the clock and saw that it was just past five o'clock. He lied back down, but couldn't sleep anymore. He took a book from the nightstand, and started reading it, not knowing what else there was to do. He read until he heard a sound coming from the room next to his, which was Connor's. He hurried over to Connor's room and opened the door. When he saw that Connor was still sound asleep, he headed back to his room, figuring Connor had made the sound in his sleep. It was five to seven, so Jude didn't go back to his bed, and went into the kitchen. He made himself a cup of coffee and sat down on one of the chairs. He stared out of the window to the old lady who lived on the other side of the street. She was watering the flowers. Jude thought how weird it was that old people always seem to be up so early, but shrugged the thought off of him. He watched as the lady's cat followed her around the house, and he smirked. Almost exactly Connor, he thought, always looking for attention.

Jude's stomach began to growl, so he stood up, took a pan out of the cupboard and made fried eggs with bacon for breakfast.  
"Hmm, that smells good," Erin said as she walked into the kitchen.  
"Thanks," Jude said as he filled two plates with the food. He placed one in front of Erin and one in front of himself. He had left something for Connor, but he doubted if Connor would feel like eating. When he had finished he asked Erin if it was a good idea to wake up Connor. Erin, not experienced with this situation, said it was alright and Jude filled the third plate with food and went up to Connor's room. He went inside, placed the plate on Connor's desk and sat down on the edge of Connor's bed. He kissed Connor's forehead, but he didn't know why. He then laid his hand on Connor's shoulder and shook it.  
"Connor, wake up," he said, but Connor didn't.  
"Connor, wake up," Jude tried again, shaking harder, and this time, it had the effect Jude wanted.  
"Hmmm?" Connor said groggily.  
"Connor?" Jude asked.  
"Yeah?" Connor replied.  
"Good, you're awake," Jude said.  
"Good? I feel like shit," Connor said.  
"I can imagine," Jude said.  
"Why do I feel this way?" Connor asked.  
"Can you remember yesterday evening?" Jude asked. Connor panicked a little when he couldn't remember the evening before, and Jude had to calm him down. Still unsure if Connor had meant the words about liking girls, Jude didn't know what to do to calm Connor down, so he just slowly talked to him.  
"Connor please, don't panic, it's alright. There's nothing wrong with you. Connor, you're home and safe, no need to worry," Jude tried and it calmed Connor.  
"Why don't I remember anything?" Connor asked.  
"Because you were totally drunk yesterday evening. It's understandable that you don't remember anything. You might remember later, you might not, but it doesn't matter," Jude said.  
"Was I drunk?" Connor asked.  
"Yeah, you were pretty far gone. Who am I?" Jude asked.  
"You're Jude, I mean, I'd always remember that!" Connor replied.  
"What is my relation to you?" Jude asked.  
"You're my boyfriend and best friend," Connor replied.  
"He remembers it again!" Jude shouted to the door, knowing that Erin could hear him.  
"Shhhhhh," Connor shushed Jude, as he grabbed his forehead.  
"Headache?" Jude asked him.  
"Majorly," Connor replied.  
"I figured, I made you drink some glasses of water yesterday, lucky I did, otherwise you'd be dying of pain right now," Jude said.  
"Jude, what happened yesterday evening?" Connor asked, curious to what he'd done.

Jude sighed, not really feeling the need to go over it himself, but he had to in order to let Connor know what had happened.  
"Well, we were going to Justin's for a party. When we got there, we were surprised by how many people were there, and Justin offered you a beer, you declined and promised not to drink any alcohol," Jude began.  
"Shit, I'm so sorry Jude," Connor said.  
"It's okay, I guess. Anyway, you went over to Daniel to talk to him and I walked over to Alex to talk to him. After a while, Daniel joined us and I asked where you were. He said you were drinking with some guys. I looked through the house and finally found you. When I did, you were already drunk. You had five beers in five minutes, and the alcohol was hitting you hard. I took you outside for some fresh air, hoping that would do you good, but you couldn't remember anything. Not even that I'm your boyfriend. You basically said you weren't gay and started yelling at girls that they were hot," Jude said, and his voice broke again.  
"I didn't mean that, Jude. I'm super gay. I'm yours and I always will be!" Connor said, knowing he had hurt his boyfriend.  
"You said you wanted to beat up your father," Jude said.  
"I did? Wow… I was really far gone, in my right mind I know that I couldn't stand a chance against him," Connor said, shocked about how drunk he had been.  
"I called your mom and texted Justin that we were going, your mom came to pick us up and we drove here. I gave you a sponge bath, as you reeked of alcohol. I then made you drink some water and I tucked you in. I then went downstairs and told your mother what happened. I called moms and arranged that I could stay over." Jude finished his story.  
"Oh, mom's gonna kill me, she is just back into my life and she's seen me drunk at fifteen… What must she think of me?" Connor asked and he slightly panicked again.  
"She's a bit disappointed but she said I took good care of you. You two will be alright, I don't think she will go too hard on you. She knows you're a good kid," Jude reassured him.  
"Thanks," Connor said, taking Jude's hand, making Jude feel loved again, which Jude wanted, as he still wasn't over Connor's words.  
"Is there any food? I'm starving," Connor asked.  
"Yeah, I got some here for you," Jude answered and handed him the plate.  
"How thoughtful of you. See, this is why I would never again deny that you're my boyfriend. You're way too sweet for that," Connor said, knowing that this would reassure Jude of his love, and it did. When Connor had finished his plate, Jude took it and walked to the door. Connor stood up from his bed and walked over with him.  
"You'd better change first, and while you're at it, change your undies. That's the only thing I didn't change yesterday evening," Jude said.  
"Thank you," Connor said, and he reddened at the thought of Jude changing his underwear for him, and was glad that it didn't happen.

Jude walked into the kitchen and placed the empty plate in the dishwasher. He then sat down opposite of Erin.  
"How's he?" she asked.  
"He's good. He is changing now, but will come down in a minute," Jude answered, and indeed a minute later Connor appeared in at the kitchen door. He looked down, not wanting to face his mother yet. Erin walked over to him and pulled him close. They hugged for a while as Jude looked.  
"Mom, I'm sorry," Connor began, but Erin interrupted him.  
"It's okay, Connor, actually, I'm glad that you had this experience, let it be a warning for the next time, okay?" Erin asked and Connor nodded.  
"How's your head?" Jude asked.  
"Hurts like a bitch," Connor answered. Erin walked over to the cupboard and gave Connor a painkiller.  
"I hope this'll help," Erin said.  
"Thanks mom," Connor said, and he walked over to the sink to take the pill with some water. Afterwards he sat down on the chair next to Jude and without saying anything, they sat there for a long time.

"What do you feel like doing?" Jude eventually asked him.  
"Right now, quite nothing," Connor replied.  
"You want to lie down on your bed together?" Jude asked. Connor looked at Jude for a while.  
"Sure," he eventually said, and he smiled at Jude. The two of them walked upstairs and Jude lied down on his back. Connor lied down next to him and placed his head on Jude's chest so that he could hear Jude's heartbeat.  
"I love you, Jude," he said, still trying to make Jude feel loved, as he felt bad about what he had done to Jude the night before. Jude didn't say anything. Connor looked up and saw that Jude had a tear in his eye.  
"Jude, what's wrong?" he asked.  
"I've always been told that a drunk man's speech is a sober man's thoughts, so I was afraid that you didn't like me the way you said you liked me," Jude said.  
"I'm sorry, I really am, and I don't think I meant anything what I said when I was drunk. I mean, I said I wanted to beat up my dad, but I don't, the same goes for this. Jude, I really love you, and I hate that I made you question it. I love you," Connor said.  
"I love you too," Jude said and he wrapped his arm around Connor's body. Connor scooted up a little so that his mouth was near Jude's neck. He slowly gave Jude a kiss on his neck and Jude smiled. When Connor saw that, he gave Jude another kiss. A few more kisses later, Connor decided to take it a step further. He nuzzled his face in Jude's neck, placed his lips and sucked. When he broke, a big spot had formed in Jude's neck and Connor looked satisfied.  
"What did you do?" Jude asked him.  
"I kind of gave you a hickey," Connor replied.  
"NO WAY!" Jude shouted as he jumped up. Connor shushed him again, as his head still hurt. Jude walked to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. He indeed saw the big mark that Connor left and walked back into Connor's room where Connor was laughing on his bed.  
"I'm gonna get you back!" Jude said as he tried to pin Connor to the bed, but Connor was faster and had Jude pinned down before Jude even knew it and gave him another hickey on the other side. Jude gave up.  
"You know, I'll walk around with these proudly, it's a sign that my boyfriend wants me so bad that he tries to taste my blood," Jude teased Connor.  
"Ewww, gross," Connor said and he pulled a face. The two of them lied down again in the same position as before and Connor nuzzled in on Jude again.  
"Don't," Jude simply said and Connor instantly understood the message.  
"I wasn't even going to give you another hickey!" Connor defended himself, "can I just feel close to my boyfriend by smelling him without him thinking I'm giving him a hickey?"  
"You can, but it's badly timed, right after you gave me two hickeys," Jude said while laughing.  
Connor gave Jude another little kiss in his neck and then they lied still. After a little while, Connor tried to reassure Jude of his love again.  
"Jude, I really love you, I would never give you up. I just really love you," he said. Again, Jude didn't reply. Connor looked up and saw that Jude was asleep. Jude's arm was still around Connor so Connor didn't dare to move. With his hand, he could just reach the blankets and pulled them up over them. He tucked them both in, gave the sleeping Jude another kiss and then nuzzled in on him again. Within a minute, Connor too was sound asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Revelations (Even More Secrets Revealed)".


	17. Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17 – REVELATIONS (EVEN MORE SECRETS REVEALED)

Jude, can you come over? I found something and you gotta see it! Jude's phone read. Jude sighed. His mothers had sent him to his room to clean up and he was almost done. He hit the reply button and texted Connor back.  
I'll be right over, gotta finish cleaning my room first, will be there in approx. 30 min. He laid his phone on his desk and continued. He only had to clean half the room as Jesus slept in the same room and he had to do the other half. The only thing he had yet to clean was his desk so he relocated his phone. He threw it on his bed and turned around to face his desk. Screw it, he thought and he threw everything on his bed and then cleaned his desk. Afterwards, he placed everything back, tidy and neatly. He grabbed his phone and wallet and ran downstairs.  
"I'm going to Connor's!" he announced as he walked to the door.  
"Not so fast young man!" Stef said as she walked up the stairs, "first I'm going to inspect!".  
Jude waited impatiently as Stef inspected his room. When she came back, she looked satisfied.  
"It all looks great, you can go, but be home by 6! We've got family dinner and afterwards…" Stef said and paused to cause tension, but Lena walked in and ruined the surprise.  
"Game night!" She said.  
"I love game night!" Jude said, "can Connor come over for dinner and games?". Neither Stef nor Lena had to think about that for long before answering.  
"Sure! The more the merrier! Besides, he's basically part of the family," Lena said.  
"Thanks moms!" Jude said, smiling.  
"Now go!" Stef told him and Jude gladly did.

When Jude arrived at Connor's, Connor was already waiting for him at the front porch.  
"That was forty minutes," he joked as Jude parked his bike.  
"Dork," Jude simply replied, out or breath because he'd cycled fast to get to Connor's.  
"Come in, I've discovered something," Connor said as he opened the door to the house Jude knew so well.  
"You've made me quite curious," Jude said while laughing. Connor didn't reply, but instead, he ran over towards the stairs and waited for Jude to join him. Connor led him to the only place Jude hadn't yet been in this house: the attic. Now Jude thought about it, it'd never even been in the attic of the Adams-Foster residence. He made a mental note to do that someday before he followed Connor up the stairs that led to the attic. Connor was already upstairs, but had neglected to put on the light.  
"Connor, could you put on a light? I can't see anything!" Jude said and Connor did was he was asked to do. Jude climbed the last few steps and found Connor sitting there on his knees, looking through an old photobook.  
"No," Connor muttered to himself.  
"What are we doing here?" Jude asked.  
"Mum asked me to clean up here in the attic and I came across something, but I think I put it back in disbelief, could you help moving this box out of the way?" Connor asked. The two boys did and Connor began looking through another old book.  
"Could you at least tell me what we're searching for?" Jude asked, his tone slightly irritated.  
"It's an old picture of my dad," Connor replied.  
"I see," Jude said, "and what's so special about it?". Connor looked at him and sighed.  
"I can't tell you just yet, you have to see it, otherwise the shock will be gone," Connor explained, and Jude became even more curious. He sat down on an old chair, waiting for Connor to find what he wanted to find. When Jude settled in the chair, he heard a creaking sound and before long, he was lying on the ground. Connor shot up, alarmed by the sound, looked at Jude and started laughing as he saw his boyfriend on the ground next to the collapsed chair.  
"I already thought it was good for the garbage," Connor chuckled.  
"What, me or the chair?" Jude asked.  
"The chair of course, but thank you for proving me right," Connor responded. This comment made Jude laugh and Connor turned around again, trying to find that one special photograph.

Before Jude sat down again, he first tested the chair with a box which Jude estimated to be the same weight as himself, and this chair did hold up. Jude removed the box and carefully sat down, expecting to hear the creaking sound again, but it didn't come. He amused himself by watching how Connor flipped through the pages of the photobooks, desperately trying to find the photo again.  
"Can you lend me a hand?" Connor asked and Jude helped Connor move another heavy box fully loaded with dusty, old books. Jude said down again, not being able to help Connor, and he just watched. God, how can you not just love that dorkiness, he thought, it's adorable.   
Connor became quite frustrated and Jude felt bad that he couldn't do anything, but he knew that if he'd help Connor searching, there would be a bigger risk of missing the picture, as Jude didn't know what the heck he'd have to look for. Connor began to curse, which was followed by a voice from downstairs.  
"Language, young man," Erin shouted, which cracked Jude up. Connor became more and more irritated with himself as he pushed another (lighter) box of books aside.  
"It has to be here somewhere," he muttered angrily.  
"Do you remember what the cover of the book looked like?" Jude asked, trying to help.  
"No, I was too shocked by the picture to even remember to look at it," Connor responded.

When he had finished another box load of books, he noticed that he'd had all boxes. He hit the wall in frustration as he felt like he was disappointing Jude. Just when Jude was about to walk over to Connor to tranquilize him, he noticed a picture lying on a table in the corner.  
"Connor, there is a picture on that table there… any change that might be it?" Jude asked. Connor looked up and hit his own forehead as he remembered.  
"Of course! I had laid it aside so that I didn't have to search so long," Connor said and again, Jude laughed at Connor's dorkiness.  
"Go and look on it," Connor said, and he gave Jude a slight push in the direction where the photograph was lying. Jude walked over and when he reached it, he couldn't instantly see what was so weird about it. He studied the picture carefully. He saw a younger version of Adam than he'd ever known, and he stood alongside another man. They both had their hands in their pockets and they were leaning against a wall. When Jude looked closely, he saw that they were standing against a house. They were standing on dead grass, or so it seemed. Neither of the two men looked visibly happy, but neither of them looked sad either. They both looked neutral, which Jude found odd, but that couldn't be why Connor was so eager to show him this. Jude looked deeper into the picture, trying to find what had looked so weird to Connor. He looked at every little detail of every little aspect of the picture, but he couldn't see what Connor had found so weird about it. Finally, Jude looked at the posture of the two young men, but again, he didn't see anything weird. He questioningly looked at Connor, who was expectantly looking at him.

"Haven't found it yet?" Connor simply asked.  
"Not quite, give me a hint," Jude answered.  
"You might want to check the back," Connor said while winking.  
"Oh the back, why didn't I think of that?" Jude said sarcastically as he flipped the piece of paper. On the back, there was a handwritten note in a handwriting Jude didn't recognize. It had faded a little, but it was still readable.

To Adam,  
I hope this brings back good memories.  
May our love never end.  
Yours forever, Chris

Jude read the not over and over again, trying to make sense out of it, but the words didn't make sense to either of the boys.  
"What, your dad… had a… boyfriend?" Jude stammered while Connor sat down.  
"Yeah," Connor simply answered.  
"But he's like the biggest homophobe I've ever met!" Jude exclaimed.  
"I know," Connor said and he sounded sad.  
"I found it just before I texted you, and I asked you over because I just needed a second opinion, but as your thoughts are the same, what else could it be?" Connor said.  
"I don't know," Jude admitted, "it's quite explicitly about love".  
"I just don't get it! He's had a boyfriend, but still he raised me telling me that being gay is wrong and sick and filthy, while he's been in a homosexual relation himself! And a pretty happy one as far as I can derive from this Chris' note…" Connor said and his voice broke a little. A tear formed in Connor's eye. Jude wiped it away with his thumb and softly kissed Connor's forehead.  
"I just don't understand why he told me time and time again how bad it is to be gay, basically telling me how bad I am, while he… while he isn't much better himself when it comes to that!" Connor said and he punched the wall again in frustration. Jude stood up and pulled Connor up with him. Jude embraced Connor and held him tight.  
"It's okay," Jude whispered into Connor's ear as he felt a tear fall on his shoulder. Connor seemed to be comforted by it, so Jude repeated himself a few times. Eventually two broke their hug as Erin called upstairs.  
"Jude, Connor, are you coming down for tea?" she asked. Jude answered that they'd be down in a minute and together, they dried Connor's tears. They climbed down the narrow stairs and went into the living room where Erin had already poured out three cups of tea. The two sat down and Erin asked Connor how the attic was going.  
"Good," Connor answered, "it's nearly finished". The three of them then silently started sipping their hot tea.

Eventually, Connor's curiosity became too big.  
"Mum, did you know dad has had a boyfriend?" he asked. Erin's mouth fell open and, as she'd just taken a sip, she spilled tea over her shirt, which she didn't even try to clean up.  
"What?" she asked a little louder than normal.  
"Yeah," Connor said, "that was my reaction too, and Jude's too".  
"How do you know?" Erin asked and Connor took the picture from his pocket, where he had put it when they came down. Erin examined the photo as close as Jude had.  
"So? This doesn't prove anything, they might just be friends," Erin said.  
"Look on the back," Jude and Connor said in unison. Erin flipped the photo and her jaw dropped again.  
"Wow… Who would've thought? Adam Stevens, the world's biggest homophobe has had a boyfriend…" she said and both Jude and Connor had to admit that Erin had said that quite accurately and eloquently. They finished their tea silently, all three of them thinking for themselves about what they'd just found out. When they had finished, Jude and Connor asked Erin if Connor could stay over at the Adams-Foster's and Erin gave her permission. This would be her first night alone in this house, as Connor hadn't stayed over at Jude's since the day Erin arrived in San Diego, just after Adam was sent to prison. The boys then headed to the attic to clean up the mess Connor had made trying to look for the picture.

When they had just put the last box back in its place, Jude looked around and saw that the whole attic still was a chaos.  
"Weren't you supposed to clean this?" Jude asked, and Connor quickly shushed him.  
"My mother won't check, she has a bad hip so she won't come up here to see it it's tidy. So while she thought I was cleaning up this mess, I was just looking through the stuff here," Connor explained.  
"Which is why you've found the picture," Jude added.  
"Exactly," Connor admitted and Jude laughed.  
"You're such a dork," Jude said.  
"Which is why we're perfect for each other, two dorks," was Connor's comeback and Jude pouted.  
"I'm no dork!" He said.  
"A cute dork!" Connor replied as he kissed Jude's pouting lips. The two climbed back down the stairs and Connor changed for the family dinner he was going to attend. When he came back, he and Jude descended the last stairs and walked into the kitchen to say goodbye too Erin. When they had done that and were just about to leave, something came into Connor's mind.  
"Mum?" he asked.  
"Hmmm?" was her answer.  
"Could I maybe use the attic as a gaming room?" he asked.  
"Well, I never come there anyway, so if you've got enough power outlets there, I don't see why not," she answered, satisfying Connor. As he and Jude walked out, they were discussing the possibilities.  
"We could game all night long!" Connor said.  
"And have sleepovers there!" Jude added and contently, the two boys made their way over to the Adams-Foster residence for the family dinner and game night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Thunder".


	18. Thunder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "The Letter Pt. 1".

CHAPTER 18 – THUNDER

When the boys arrived at the Adams-Foster residence, Lena was just about to call Jude to see where they were. Jude opened the door and he and Connor were greeted by a sigh of relief. Lena had thought something had happened causing them to be late, but she was relieved to the two boys in perfect state.  
"Come in," she said, "Dinner is just about ready! Welcome Connor!" The boys went into the kitchen and saw that the kitchen table was made into a buffet with all kinds of food. There were multiple salads, different types of potatoes, rice, vegetables (both raw and cooked) and a lot of dishes neither boy could identify. Seeing all this food made Connor's mouth water and he and Jude loaded their plates with food.  
"Tomorrow's leftover day?" Jude jokingly asked.  
"You bet," Stef said laughing. Jesus came into the room and greeted Connor as he walked by. Jesus then slowly turned around and faced Connor.  
"You're not staying over, are you?" he asked. Connor wanted to answer, but Lena did instead.  
"Yes, he is staying over!" she said." Jesus sighed deeply.  
"Fine, I'll sleep on the couch," he said.  
Connor then joined Jude in the living room and started to eat his food. When Stef walked in, Connor couldn't help but comment on how good the food was.  
"All compliments to the chef, please," Stef said, just when Lena walked in. Connor repeated his compliment and Lena thanked him. During the rest of the dinner, the family discussed which game they'd play. Jesus and Brandon wanted to play some card game, to which Callie jokingly proposed to play strip poker. None of the others were really into it, so they decided not to do it. Connor proposed monopoly and Stef and Lena found that to be more appropriate and appealing. The rest agreed (although Jesus somewhat reluctantly), so they settled on that.

When everybody had finished eating, Stef and Lena went to the kitchen to clean up and Jude and Jesus went upstairs. Jude went to fetch the board game whereas Jesus went to fetch some stuff for his sleepover on the couch. When both of them had returned, Callie and Mariana set up the board. Stef usually played as both player and the bank, but the kids recently found out that she cheated, giving herself more money than the rest and so they decided that Brandon would play as bank. Brandon felt trusted by the others, but what they didn't tell him was that they chose him because he was the worst liar of all. They had just finished setting up when Stef and Lena came back from the kitchen. Stef tried to change their minds by pleading to be the back, but it didn't work, so she pouted. Connor started and the game was on. Soon they found out that Brandon was more fair than Stef, so they felt at ease. As the game proceeded, Jude lost a lot of money whereas Connor earned a lot. They started the game at seven o'clock and by twelve, only Connor and Jesus were still in the game. Neither of the two had much money left, so it was an exciting race to victory. Jesus seemed to have more luck than Connor, as Connor constantly had to pay Jesus, but Jesus ended up on Connor's Boardwalk (where Connor had placed an hotel just a few minutes before) causing Jesus to go bankrupt, thus ending the game with Connor as victor. Jude congratulated him with a firm hug and three kisses. One on each cheek and one on his lips.  
"Get a room!" Jesus said, a little bad-tempered because of his loss. The two boys broke apart and laughed.  
"Alright, we'll continue in our room," Jude said, "in fact, why don't we take it to Jesus' bed?"  
"No!" Jesus shouted and everybody laughed, knowing that Jude hadn't seriously meant what he said.  
"It's high time you go to bed though," Lena said, glancing over to the clock and seeing that it was past twelve. The two boys, realizing that they were pretty tired went upstairs. They brushed their teeth and changed into their pyjama's together. After the camping trip and the week Connor had spent at the Adams-Fosters prior to Adam's hearing, the two had gotten used to changing in front of each other and it wasn't as awkward as before. Only if one of them had to change their underwear, they'd go into different rooms, as neither of the boys felt the need to take that next step in their relation yet. After all, they were only fourteen and fifteen years old.

They didn't place the beds together as usual, because they were too tired for that, so Connor lied down in Jesus' bed. Jude jokingly tucked him in, after which they kissed each other goodnight. Jude walked over to his own bed and lied down too as he turned off the light. Neither of the boys slept instantly. They both still thought about their discovery this afternoon. Both boys still had questions (the majority of them the same) without answers, and besides that, neither of them believed what they'd found out. They just couldn't imagine Adam with a boyfriend. Jude finally fell asleep around one, while Connor was still pondering about his father's past. He was still wide awake when it started raining at half past one. Connor didn't mind a little bit of rain, but it didn't exactly help him falling asleep. He watched as Jude's silhouette moved up and down at every breath he took. Suddenly, Jude's body shot up at the same moment as the thunder struck. His breath was panting and Connor sensed something was wrong. He stood up and walked over to Jude's bed. Jude only saw him when he was standing right next to him. Connor had expected Jude to be startled, but instead, Jude grabbed Connor's legs tightly and hugged him.  
"What's wrong?" Connor asked, but Jude didn't reply. He just felt Jude's arms grabbing him tighter. Connor freed himself from Jude's hold and sat down next to him on the bed. Once he sat, he wrapped his arms around Jude and pulled him close. He softly kissed Jude's forehead before letting Jude's head rest on his shoulder. Jude's breath started to slow down, as Connor had hoped it would. Connor did feel a stream of tears on his shoulder, so he didn't break the hug. When Jude was tranquillized, he pulled back.  
"What's wrong?" Connor repeated himself.  
"Bad dream," Jude replied.  
"Want to talk about it?" Connor asked while grabbing Jude's hand.  
"It was about your dad," Jude said and Connor squeezed his hand.  
"He got free and tried to chase after you. I tried to stop him but he threw me aside. He then pulled a gun out of his pocked, pointed it at you and I heard a loud bang. That's when I woke up," Jude explained, still shaking. Connor pulled him close again, holding Jude's head against his chest like a parent comforting their child.  
"That sound was thunder, so nothing to be afraid of. And I'm still here! And my dad is still in prison and everything is fine," Connor said, reassuring Jude. What Connor didn't know, (because Jude never told him, because he was too embarrassed to) was that Jude still was afraid of thunder and lightning. He had been as a little kid, but still was, as he never had a real parent to be there for him to comfort him. He always had ran to Callie's room to seek comfort. Now he was with Stef and Lena, but he still was afraid.

Jude pulled back from the hug and looked Connor in the eye.  
"Thanks for being here for me," he said.  
"Hey, I'm your boyfriend, that's what I'm here for!" Connor replied. Jude's face broke into a small smile as Connor wiped away another tear from Jude's eye. Connor kissed Jude on his forehead and rubbed Jude's cheek. Jude loved these kinds of affection and he nuzzled in on Connor, carefully kissing his neck. He pulled Connor down on his bed until Connor was lying with his back flat on the bed. Jude then placed his head on Connor's chest and the regular, slow heartbeat comforted Jude to the point where he was almost completely alright again. Nonetheless, he didn't want Connor to leave.  
"Will you please say here with me?" Jude asked.  
"In this bed?" Connor questioned.  
"Yeah," Jude simply answered.  
"But it's a single bed," Connor said.  
"The bed might be, but I'm not," Jude hesitantly joked, and Connor failed when he tried not to laugh.  
"I don't mind that this is a single bed. It makes me feel close to you to lie so… well… close to you. It makes me feel safe." Jude added. How could Connor say no to that? All he wanted was for Jude to feel safe.  
"Can I at least lie under the sheets?" Connor jokingly asked and Jude did not hold him back. Jude offered to lie on the side of the wall, and Connor figured that Jude felt most safe like that: on one side guarded by the wall, and on the other by Connor. The two of them just fit in the bed if they both lied on their sides, and so they did, Connor spooning Jude. Connor heard Jude mutter something, but he couldn't make out what it was, so he responded by softly kissing the back of Jude's head. Connor wrapped his arm around Jude, making Jude feel safe and secure. Connor soon heard Jude's respiration slow down and figured that Jude had fallen asleep again. Connor buried his face in Jude's hair and sniffed. Jude's hair smelled like it always did, a scent which Connor never could describe. Smelling this scent (which was one of Connor's favourite smells), Connor too began to feel a little drowsy and soon, he too fell asleep.

At eleven in the morning, Stef and Lena got a bit worried. Even when Connor slept over, Jude would have been out of bed by now. Besides, Jesus was impatient to have his room back, so Stef decided to check in on them. Within a minute, she was back, asking Lena to come upstairs as well. Lena followed her and Stef opened the door again, revealing to Lena that the two boys were sleeping together. Stef felt somewhat angry, having told the boys over and over again not to sleep in one bed together. She was fine with them putting the beds together, but this was different. Lena remembered the thunderstorm, so she wasn't as angry as Stef seemed to be, understanding the situation.  
"Stef, don't wake them up, don't be angry," Lena said.  
"Why not? They're lying together in a single bed!" Stef protested.  
"There was a thunderstorm this night. You slept through it, but I'm willing to bet that Jude didn't. You know how he reacts on lightning and thunder. He probably got scared, and you know how protective Connor is of our little baby," Lena explained, changing Stef's mind.  
"In that case, I understand it this once," she said. She then started laughing as she remembered something.  
"Remember his first thunderstorm here?" she asked Lena, who also started to laugh.  
"Who doesn't? He ran across the hallway crying and screaming for Callie. He woke up everybody! Especially Mariana and Jesus were not pleased. It didn't really help that it was his first night here either!" Lena laughed at the memory.  
"Well, he's come a long way since then, but he still doesn't like it, so it's only good for him to be guarded by someone he truly loves," Lena added, and Stef agreed.  
"As long as they're wearing clothes!" Stef said semi-seriously. Lena didn't get the joking tone and was shocked by Stef's comment.  
"Stef! They're fourteen and fifteen years old! DO you really think they'd do that?" she asked.  
"Well, kids start exploring earlier these days. They wouldn't be the youngest couple," Stef argued.  
"Well, I don't think they do, but if it makes you feel better, I'll check," Lena said as she walked over to the bed where the two boys were still sound asleep. She slowly lifted the sheets and saw that both boys were wearing their pyjama's, so she dropped the sheets and walked over to Stef.  
"They are both wearing pyjama's, so there is no reason to worry," she reported. Stef let out a sigh of relief and she and Lena stood still and watched the two boys sleep.  
"At least we don't have to worry about teen pregnancy with these two," Stef joked and they both had a hard time not laughing out loud in fear of waking up the boys.  
"Look at how protective Connor is, wrapping his arm around Jude like that, and holding him close!" Stef commented.  
"But at the same time, Connor is smelling Jude's hair, it's so cute!" Lena pointed out and the two made a small noise seeing the cuteness of their son and his boyfriend. The two decided that it was best to go out of the room before they'd wake up wake up they boys.  
"I think that our son is in good hands with Connor," Stef seriously said when they'd stepped out.  
"He sure is, I'm so glad they've found each other!" Lena agreed. The two decided to leave the boys sleeping.  
"But what about Jesus?" Lena asked.  
"Oh, we'll give him an errand to run to keep him busy," Stef said and laughing, Lena agreed.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: I am honestly sorry for updating this late... I had forgotten all about it wednesday, so I'm sorry. I do hope you'll like this chapter!

CHAPTER 19 – THE LETTER PT. 1

"Hey Jude, Want to come over this afternoon to do homework together? I have this maths assignment I don't understand," Connor said as he approached Jude's locker, where Jude was grabbing his books for his upcoming lessons. The lunchbreak had just begun, so the hallways of Anchor Beach were crowded. Jude slammed his locker shut, turned to face Connor and Connor could see that Jude was laughing.  
"What's so funny?" Connor asked.  
"You asking me to help you with maths, that's funny! You know that maths is my weak subject!" Jude said, and Connor felt stupid for forgetting that.  
"Oh, right," he said and he looked disappointed. When Jude saw Connor's disappointed face, he couldn't reject.  
"But I'll try," he said, and Connor's face brightened. He gave Jude a peck on his lips and took Jude's hand, both boys feeling happy that they could do that so freely now they were out on school. Jude led Connor to Lena's office, and he knocked on the door.  
"Come in," Lena called from behind the closed door. The two boys opened the door and saw Stef and Lena sitting on the chairs.  
"Hey love, what are you two doing here?" Stef asked.  
"I just wanted to ask if I could go over to Connor's after school to do homework together," Jude said. Stef and Lena looked at each other for a brief moment.  
"Sure," Lena said.  
"If you come and have lunch with us right now!" Stef jokingly added. The two boys sat down and took their lunch bags from their backpacks. Stef was in uniform, on duty, but had a quiet period. When the four had nearly finished, Stef got called away in emergency, so she quickly kissed Lena before rushing out of the room, to the car parked outside. The bell rang soon after that and Jude and Connor walked over to the door to go to their lesson.  
"Jude?" Lena said when Jude had reached the door. He turned around to face his mother.  
"Be home by six okay?" she finished and Jude nodded. Lena kissed Jude on top of his head and gave him a little push towards the hallway.  
"Now go to your lesson," she said, stepping into her role of vice-principal. Jude took Connor's hand and together, they walked to their lesson.

When the day was over for the boys (which was at two o'clock), they took their bikes and made their way over to Connor's house. On their way, they were joking about how they'd probably not end up doing homework, being too distracted by each other. Connor's house came in sight and the boys slowed down. They steered through the gates to Connor's driveway and parked their bikes there. Jude locked his bike, as he knew that he'd panic if he didn't feel the keys in his pocket. Connor opened the door and he was greeted by his mother.  
"Hey Connor, I'm in the kitchen!" she said and the boys walked into the kitchen.  
"Oh, hey Jude! Nice surprise to see you here!" Erin said as she noticed him walking behind Connor.  
"Why don't you guys have a drink?" Erin said as she opened the fridge to see what they had.  
"Nah, we're good," Connor said and Jude agreed.  
"I insist you drink something," Erin said, and Connor sighed, "now what do you want? We have orange juice and coke."  
"Just a glass of water is fine," Jude said as he walked over to the sink and poured it himself. Connor did the same and Erin was partially satisfied. She was glad that they at least drank something, but she'd wanted to do it for them as she couldn't shake the feeling that she'd been a bad parent, not being there for Connor through most of his childhood. Just as Connor and Jude were about to go upstairs to begin with their homework, Erin remembered something.  
"Oh Connor, something came in the mail today, it's for you," she said, handing Connor a letter. Connor and Jude shared a look of puzzlement as they walked up the stairs. When they arrived in Connor's new game room, Connor threw his backpack on the floor and turned to Jude.  
"Do you mind if I read this first?" he asked and Jude said it was alright.  
"Whatever it is, I'll read it out load so you can hear, I have no secrets for you," Connor said and Jude found that very sweet. Connor opened the envelope and unfolded the papers inside. He first went to the last page to see who the sender was. When he saw it, he froze.  
"Who is it?" Jude asked.  
"My… dad," Connor said. Curiously, he started to read the letter out loud so Jude could hear it.

Dear Connor,  
I know that I haven't been the dad I was supposed to be, but please, be patient with me one last time. Please read this letter in its entirety. Your words in court and the time so far here in jail have got me thinking about how I've failed you as father.

"He failed me alright!" Connor snorted, getting a little angry.  
"Connor please, he sounds like he regrets it a lot… please be patient with him one last time, for me," Jude said and Connor continued.

I am aware of the fact that I've been the worst possible dad of all times and I deeply regret that. Here in prison, they play music each day for an hour. For this whole month, there has been this one song that always plays, and it perfectly describes what I feel our situation was.

Connor scanned the lyrics, but didn't know the song. He passed the letter to Jude, who did recognize the lyrics, so he started singing.

I'm just the pieces of the man I used to be  
Too many bitter tears are raining down on me  
I'm far away from home and I've been facing this alone  
For much too long

I feel like no one ever told the truth to me  
About growing up and what a struggle it would be  
In my tangled state of mind I've been looking back to find  
Where I went wrong

Too much love will kill you  
If you can't make up your mind  
Torn between the lover and the love you leave behind  
You're headed for disaster, cause you never read the signs  
Too much love will kill you – every time

I'm just the shadow of the man I used to be  
And it seems there's no way out of this for me  
I used to bring you sunshine, now all I ever do  
Is bring you down

How would it be if you were standing in my shoes  
Can't you see that it's impossible to choose?  
No there's no making sense of it, every way I go  
I'm bound to lose

Too much love will kill you  
Just as sure as none at all  
It'll drain the power that's in you  
Make you plead and scream and crawl  
And the pain will make you crazy, you're the victim of my crime  
Too much love will kill you – every time

Too much love will kill you,  
It will make your life a lie  
Too much love will kill you and you won't understand why  
You'd give your life, you'd sell your soul, but here it comes again  
Too much love will kill you – in the end

When Jude was finished, Connor was in tears, though he didn't want to show Jude.  
"You know every song ever, don't you?" Connor joked to mask the tears. Jude stuck out his tongue as he handed Connor the letter again, wanting to hear the rest and Connor continued reading.

This song made me realize what I'd done to you. Let me briefly explain:  
Too much love will kill you if you can't make up your mind  
Torn between the lover and the love you leave behind  
This is about your mother. I was devastated when we divorced. I lost everything I had, and so I fought for the only part of her I could get: you.

You're headed for disaster.  
I am so, so, so sorry that I drug you down into that disaster with me. If I could redo and improve one point in my life, it'd be that, for sure.

Too much love will kill you, just as sure as none at all.  
I was so desperately busy trying to spare you that too much love, that I slipped into the opposite. No love at all is just as deadly as too much. I'm glad that Jude gave you the love you needed, for that part, but I'll get back to that.

My point of view on how to raise a child has changed by hearing your words on how you always felt afraid of me, and amplified by the song I just quoted. The month I've spent in prison so far has got me thinking. I spend a lot of time locked up in my cell alone (something you've done for way too long when I was still your father). I have plenty of time to think about what I have done to you, and it makes me cry to see what kind of monster I've become. I often wake up at night and cry because of what I've done, and when I do, I realize how you must have felt when you were in your room at night, doors locked in fear that I might come in and beat you up while you helplessly lied in bed. I try to understand what it must have been like, but I don't think I can. I think experience is needed to understand what that's like.

Now, by door is almost always locked here, but never because I'm scared of the guards. I should have been like a guard to you. I should have guarded you from the evil outside world, but I was the evil in your life, and I'm sorry, Connor, I truly am. I hope that there's a way I could make it up to you, but I'd understand if you never want to see me again. I realize that I've done terrible things to you, scarring you for live, and I realize that if you don't want to see me ever again, I've more than deserved that. When I wake up crying in the middle of the night, I pray, wishing that time could be reset, so I would get a new chance, being the parent you deserve, not the parent I have been. When the gavel fell and the judge proclaimed that I wasn't lawfully your father any longer, I was startled. I felt like the only sure thing in my life was taken away from me, and I just couldn't handle it. As soon as they had carried me away, I broke down in tears, as I knew that I had lost you. Now that I have a criminal record, there is no way that I will ever get my parental rights back, so you'll never lawfully be my child again, and that hurts me like nothing else. People say that it's most painful for a parent to lose their child, referring to the death of that child, but this can be compared. It's like the same.

Having said that, I would like to explain myself in regard of your relation with Jude. As much as I wish you had told me before, I do understand that you never did. I find it courageous of you to have told me anyway, before the whole court, even if you knew that there was no way I could have done anything about it anymore. I do, however, want to express my utter disgust for that kind of behaviour once more. I do not approve of your relation with another boy. A man and a man together is sickening, and it's unnatural. Two men can't have kids together, so the whole point of living (which is reproduction) is gone. So why don't we just let them die? Why do gays exist if they do not want to take part in the survival of this species? To be honest, I am utterly ashamed to know you. I am ashamed to admit to have raised you. I am ashamed to know Jude and I can imagine Jude's parent's being just as ashamed of Jude. Full of shame, I have to admit (and this is my biggest confession ever) to have had a boyfriend myself before I met Erin, your mother. You might not have known about it, as I never told you, as I'm ashamed of myself. His name was Chris and we dated for half a year, but we never became intimate. We didn't even kiss, as I was too disgusted by the mere thought of that. We broke up because I could not stand the thought of being together with a man, and I still can't. I believe being gay is nothing but disgusting and I wish that we could live in a world where homosexuality is non-existent, and where every man marries a woman, gets children and contributes to the very core of our existence: reproduction. I hope that one day, that wish will become reality, but I fear not so…

What I just wrote seems contradictory to my earlier statement of realizing I have been wrong. It isn't. I was just expressing my views, opinion and feelings. You don't have to do anything with it. I am not your father anymore, so I don't have the authority to change your mind. I can only say that if I ever come out of here and you are willing to give me a second change (or how manieth chance would it be?), I will try my very best to suppress my own opinions in order to make you feel safe. Again, I'd understand if you would feel the need to ignore me and never speak to me again. It would sadden me a lot, but I now realize that my sadness could never be compared to your hurt and fear which was (I shamefully admit) my fault. Please don't ever blame yourself for it, as you have done nothing wrong. Blame it all on me, as I never should have done these things to you.

If you've read all of this, I'd like to thank you for your time and shown patience with me, even after everything I did to you. It took me a long time before I dared writing, fearful of your response, but I think I have accepted the foresight of no letter in return. All I'd like to say is that if you don't want anything to do with me anymore, I'd like to wish you the very best, and I hope that you'll live a far happier life than I have given you so far. Again, I'm terribly sorry and I hope that you can forgive me one more time and give me one more chance in order to make up for the hell of a life I've given you.

Your father (maybe not lawfully, but always biologically),

Adam

Connor stopped reading and Jude, who had been lying on the floor with his eyes closed, focussing on the letter, looked up. He saw that Connor had gotten a little pale, so he took Connor's hand and squeezed it.  
"Are you going to give him another chance?" he softly asked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "The Letter Pt. 2".


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: I know I'm late again, and I'm horribly sorry. I have been swamped with work this week and I just couldn't find much time to post this.

CHAPTER 20 – THE LETTER PT. 2

"Are you going to give him another chance?" Jude softly asked. He waited long as Connor thought about it. Eventually, Connor lied down on the floor, next to Jude and sighed.  
"No I don't think so," he said.  
"Why not? He sounds sincere!" Jude said.  
"Because I still freshly remember the times that I wished that he would be out of my life. I'm not just gonna invite him back in!" Connor argued. Jude agreed, but somewhat hesitantly. Jude was one of those people who believed in the best of every person.  
"Besides, that part about that he's ashamed to have raised me because I'm gay!" Connor said as he looked back at the letter.  
"It even says that he's ashamed to know me! It literally says that in the letter! To be honest, I'm utterly ashamed to know you! I mean, if he's so ashamed of me, why would I ever want to invite him back into my life again?" He added.  
"Could I have the letter?" Jude asked and Connor gave it to him. Jude carefully searched for the part he wanted to show Connor again.  
"Here it is," he finally exclaimed.  
"What?" Connor asked.  
"I can only say that if I ever get out of here and you are willing to give me a second chance (or how manieth chance would it be?), I will try my very best to suppress my own opinions in order to make you feel safe," Jude read, "he says he's willing to change for you!"  
"Yeah, how many times has he said that he wanted me to feel safe? And how many times did he actually make me feel safe. That'd be 'almost always' for the first question, and the second question could only be answered with 'never'. Jude, he's never actually made me feel safe. I have no reason to believe him this time. Maybe I was too naïve to see this earlier, but he never did anything to protect me. He always made me feel unsafe, and I'm done with feeling like that!" Connor ranted and Jude could only agree, as he clearly remembered all the times he had to cheer Connor up.

Even before they'd become boyfriends, Jude had to cheer up Connor, and he remembered how he'd hugged Connor from behind just after Connor had told him that his dad often hit him. After that, Jude often hugged Connor, and Connor had always enjoyed his hugs, as it showed that Jude wanted to protect him. But unconsciously, Connor had always interpreted the hugs as more than a platonic sign of care. After a while, Jude started softly kissing Connor's hair. The first time that happened, Connor had asked Jude why he'd done that. Jude had reddened and said that his mother used to do it to him and Callie, and that Lena always did it when he was feeling scared or upset and that it always calmed him down. Connor accepted it, and Jude did it more often. On a school camping trip (both Jude's and Connor's first time camping), Connor had gotten upset again, and Jude had hugged him and kissed his hair again. Connor hadn't been able to hide his feelings for Jude anymore, and so he had kissed Jude on his lips for the first time. Jude had been confused about the sign his best friend was giving, and Connor, too embarrassed, had tried his best to fall asleep, not saying another word.

The two boys went downstairs to Erin.  
"Hey boys! Done with your homework already?" Erin asked cheerfully.  
"No mom, actually not. But we've done something else. Can we talk?" Connor asked.  
"That sounds serious," Erin said and she sat down. The boys sat down as well and Connor handed her the letter.  
"It's from Adam," he said, not wanting to call Adam his father any longer. Erin looked confused as she took the letter and pulled it out of the envelope.  
"Are you sure you want me to read this?" she asked. Connor simply nodded and Erin picked up the papers and began reading.  
"This sounds promising!" Erin said, just after she had sung the song in Adam's letter.  
"How do you both know this song and I don't?" Connor questioned, and Jude and Erin both started to laugh.  
"It's by a 70's/80's rock band called Queen, so it's no wonder that you don't know it, seeing as you call last month's music old," Jude chuckled.  
"Oh, and you listen to 80's music, I suppose?" Connor playfully said.  
"Well, remember the first time you came over to my house?" Jude asked, and Connor nodded as the scene played out in his head.

Connor rang the doorbell, feeling a little nervous. This was the first time he would be over at Jude's, and he was afraid that he'd memorized the address wrong. Besides that, he'd never met Jude's parents, so he wouldn't be able to see if it was the right house when he saw anybody but Jude opening the door. When his vice-principal opened the door, he was startled.  
"Oh… Hey… Come on in!" Lena said a little awkwardly. Connor doubtfully stepped inside, feeling a little weird to be in his vice-principal's house. He started to worry that he wasn't at Jude's, as Jude had never told him about being Lena's foster son. Lena walked over to the stairs.  
"Jude, Connor's here!" she called out, and Connor felt a lot better knowing that he was indeed at Jude's.  
"So how's your Saturday?" Lena asked him to fill up the time it took Jude to come downstairs.  
"Pretty good! We won our soccer game!" Connor said excitedly.  
"Very nice," Lena said as Jude walked down the stairs and came standing next to Lena.  
"Hey!" Jude said while smiling, excited to see his new best friend.  
"Hey Jude!" Connor responded.  
"Ahh, The Beatles!" Lena exclaimed. Connor had no idea what this meant and he questioningly looked at his friend.  
"It's a band that old people like," Jude almost apologetically explained and Connor made a mental note to search for that song when he was back home.  
"Okay, ouch," Lena said, referring to Jude calling her old.  
"Why don't you guys head up to your room and get started? Jude has everything you should need," she then added.  
"Come one!" Jude said as he ran up the stairs, Connor closely following him.

"Wait… You don't mean…" Connor stammered.  
"That I listen to The Beatles? Yeah, I do, but they're not exactly 80's," Jude said.  
"Ah, well, 90's I can handle," Connor jokingly said.  
"They're 60's," Erin laughed and Connor looked at Jude in disbelief. Jude nodded and Connor looked like he saw burning water.  
"You just went down a lot of steps on the coolness-scale," Connor joked and Jude pouted.  
"You're still very, very, very cute though," he added and he placed a kiss on Jude's pouting lips. Erin read on, commenting on the contents of the letter, as Jude and Connor silently watched her read and listened to her comments.  
"He might have been devastated after the divorce, but I certainly was not! I was more devastated that I'd lost my child! … You gave my boy no love at all? I can't hate you more at this point! … Good that you realize what a horrible dad you are! … It was damn brave of him to tell he's gay to such a homophobic son of a bitch! … Too bad that sentence is followed by the words disgusted by that kind of behaviour. It's no behaviour, it's a feeling, a feeling lots of people have, it's love, you should try it some time. Only too bad nobody wants such a moron! … You having a boyfriend, we already found out about that … It isn't contradictory? You saying you want him back into your life and you saying you're ashamed to know him is not contradictory? Adam's never been the brightest, but I never expected him to be this stupid! … Thank him for his time? You should! You're lucky that he's so patient with you!"

When Erin had finished reading and ranting, she threw the envelope containing the letter on the table in front of her.  
"This is without a doubt the weirdest thing I've ever read," she said as she closed her eyes and tilted her head backwards. Connor didn't know what this position meant, as he hadn't been able to study his mother's body language yet, but he figured that she was processing the contents of the letter in her mind. Eventually, she got up, straightened her shirt and walked over to the sink. She poured herself a glass of water and leaned back with her back against the kitchen counter.  
"That's a tough letter to read," she said and neither Jude nor Connor could distinguish a specific emotion in her voice.  
"What do you think I should do?" Connor asked and somehow, he valued the opinion of this woman, who had just walked into his life again, hugely. Erin thought for a while, long enough for Connor to wonder if he'd ever get an answer.  
"I think you should follow your heart," she eventually said. Connor punched the table, not satisfied with the answer.  
"Why do adults always give these vague answers?" he asked to no one in particular.  
"Connor relax," Jude said, but Connor didn't.  
"Hey!" Jude shouted, and Connor was shocked by his boyfriend's sudden aggressive tone.  
"Connor, I agree with your mother," Jude said, and Connor stared at him, half questioningly, half angry.  
"Connor, listen to me," Erin said, "I can't make this decision for you, and neither can Jude. All we can do is support you in any way we can!" She looked over to Jude while she said this to seek backup.  
"Yeah, Connor, we're not against you, on the contrary, we're with you, and so we don't want to jeopardize your decision!" Jude said. Connor looked at them expectantly, but he still wasn't satisfied.  
"Connor, you're fifteen, you have to make decision for you own sometimes, you can't expect me to do that, even if I would like to, after I've never been able to make decisions for you, but really Connor, you have to do this by yourself," Erin said, leaving Connor even less satisfied. He stood up, kicked his chair over and stormed out of the kitchen, leaving Erin and Jude behind.

When they heard Connor's room slam shut, Jude stood up to pick up the chair and Erin sighed.  
"You know, I understand that he's angry. He never had a parent who cared about him, so when I give him space to figure things out for himself, he feels like I don't care about what he does," Erin said to Jude.  
"I think he has to get used to being himself instead of what Adam wants him to be. Adam always chose everything for him. Which sports Connor would play, what Connor image would be and even what Connor would wear. He's not used to have this freedom and it scares him," Jude said.  
"Maybe you're right," Erin admitted, "Although Connor's older, you are more mature, Jude". Upon hearing these words, Jude shot in Connor's defence.  
"That's neither his nor my fault. Connor and I come from very different backgrounds. Connor has been treated like a kid in all aspects. The only the experience that did not make him feel like a child were the beatings, but for the rest, Connor was always treated like a child until you came here. I'm the opposite. I lost my parents when I was very little. Nobody in my family wanted to take care of me and Callie, who is my sister, so we stranded in the foster system. We basically didn't have a childhood, as we were constantly worrying about if we'd still have a roof over our heads that night. Callie and I had to mature very early and very quickly," Jude explained.  
"Gee, I never knew any of that, that's horrible! I'm so sorry!" Erin replied, looking genuinely shocked.  
"It's okay, I'm gonna talk to Connor," Jude said and he walked up the stairs.

When he came at Connor's room, he tried to open the bedroom door, but found it locked. Jude walked to the bathroom, took a hairclip and walked back. He put the small metal clip into the keyhole and opened the door (a trick he had learned in an earlier foster home where he got locked up at night). He sat down on Connor's bed, where Connor was lying. He was lying on his stomach and his head was buried in his pillow. Jude slowly petted Connor's hair and placed a kiss on it.  
"What do you want?" Connor said, sounding angry.  
"For you to be happy," Jude replied as he kept on stroking Connor's hair. Connor didn't say anything.  
"Are you afraid that he'll come after you when he comes free and you haven't replied?" Jude softly asked, and Connor slowly nodded.  
"Do you know how I got placed with the Fosters?" Jude asked and Connor realized that he didn't know.  
"The normal way? Via the foster system?" He asked.  
"No, not exactly actually," Jude answered.  
"When we were in the foster home before the Fosters, I was already questioning my sexuality. I tried on one of my foster father's ex-wife's dresses." Jude reddened at this part, embarrassed by it.  
"I bet it'd have suited you," Connor teased Jude, hesitantly smiling at the thought of that. Jude didn't reply to that, but instead continued.  
"My foster father found out about it and beat me up."  
"You've told that he'd beaten you up, but nothing more!" Connor said.  
"Please let me finish. Callie found me getting beat up, and she took a baseball bat to his car to get him to stop. Our foster father called the police and she was sent to a Juvenile Detention Centre," Jude explained.  
"Callie was in Juvie?" Connor asked.  
"Yeah, but let me finish! My foster father beat me up regularly after that, until Callie came free. Was placed in a home with no male authority figures, at Stef and Lena's. On her second day, she travelled to me and got our former foster father arrested. I was taken with Stef and Lena and we stayed," Jude finished.  
"What does that have to do with me?" Connor asked.  
"The story answers two questions you might have," Jude said, "would I ever want to see that man again? No, but contrary to your situation, this was some random dude I got placed with, not my actual dad. Will you be safe when your father comes free? Yes, he'll be on probation for a while, during which he'll be observed a lot so it's safe. Actually, Callie just ender her probation. So your father won't be able to do anything. I could even ask Stef about a restraining order. Your situation now is if you do or don't want to get in contact again," Jude said, and Connor thought deeply.  
"No, I don't," he eventually said, and Jude saw a braver Connor than he'd ever seen before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Distracted".


	21. Chapter 21

CHAPTER 21 – DISTRACTED

"Jude, are you awake, love? You gotta go to school," Stef called from beneath the stairs, waking up Jude. Jude shot up and looked on his watch to find that in twenty minutes, his class would start. He quickly dressed himself and hurried downstairs. He munched down three pancakes (not even bothering to drown them in syrup, which surprised Stef) and ran out, nearly forgetting his backpack. He cycled as fast as he could and in ten minutes, his school came in sight. He checked his watch and saw that he still had five more minutes before his class would start. His class would be the first door on the right upon entering the school, so he had plenty of time, as he already had his book in his bag. He parked his bike on its usual spot, next to Connor's. Jude walked into the school and took the first door on his right side. He sat down next to Justin, as Connor wasn't in this class. Jude wasn't paying attention when his French teacher started the class.  
"Bonjour tout le monde, aujourd'hui, nous allons travailler en groups de trois personnes," the teacher announced. Jude hadn't heard what the teacher had said, so he turned to Justin.  
"What did she say?" he asked.  
"Why are you even in this class? You never understand anything!" Justin jokingly said, and Jude shot him an annoyed look.  
"She said we are gonna be working in groups of three," Justin quickly added upon seeing Jude's expression. The class went by slowly and Jude couldn't wait until the break, when he'd see Connor again. They'd meet before school, but as Jude was late, Connor had already gone to his class when Jude arrived at school. Finally French was over and Jude headed to his maths class, also without Connor. This class went by even slower. Jude couldn't stop thinking about that he'd see Connor in just an hour, and kept looking at the clock to see how much longer the class would last. The minutes went by slowly, as in Jude's perspective, each second lasted an hour.

Eventually, the bell rang and Jude sprinted out of the classroom and to his locker. When he was finished there, he ran through the crowd of people to Connor's locker, almost bumping into Jesus.  
"Hey!" Jesus shouted at his little brother, who was too busy to apologize. He reached Connor's locker before Connor himself did, and Jude impatiently waited for Connor to arrive. After a minute, Jude saw Connor walking around the corner and to his locker. Connor's smile widened as he saw Jude and Jude almost melted inside.  
"Hey Jude!" Connor said, placing a small kiss on Jude's cheek.  
"Sorry I wasn't there before class, I overslept and I barely was here in time," Jude apologized and Connor dismissed it, saying he understood. Connor changed his books and the two walked outside, both wearing a coat, as it was cold outside.  
"Do you have any gum? I… didn't brush my teeth this morning," Jude asked. Connor was curious to how bad Jude's breath was.  
"Exhale," he said.  
"No," Jude said, pulling a face  
"Come on!" Connor pushed and Jude exhaled in Connor's direction. Connor smelled Jude's breath and decided to play a joke on Jude.  
"Oh my god, that's disgusting," Connor exclaimed.  
"I told you!" Jude said, a little annoyed.  
"I'm just kidding, but seriously, you need some gum!" Connor joked and Jude pushed his shoulder.  
"No really, it's not that bad, but here's some gum if it makes you happy," Connor said while passing Jude his strip of gum. Jude took two pieces and put them in his mouth. They sat down on their usual bench and Jude laid his head on Connor's shoulder. Connor wrapped his arm around Jude's waist, making Jude feel warm and comfortable. Connor placed a kiss on Jude's head and Jude replied to this gesture of love by taking Connor's hand and softly kissing it.

The bell rang and the boys went to their class, which was science. Today they'd be working on biology. The teacher chose who'd sit where, as this particular group of students could be very loud if everybody was sitting next to their friends. When everyone was placed, Jude looked at Connor, who was sitting on the total opposite side of the classroom, and they both looked a little lovesick, being split up. The teacher passed sheets of papers around. Jude read the title of the document. 'Anonymous Questionnaire' it read. Jude took out his pen and read the first question. 'Have you ever been in love?' he wrote a confirming answer and proceeded to the next question. 'Have you ever been in love with someone of the same gender?' Jude looked at Connor and smirked as he wrote down another confirming answer. There were more question about love, sex, alcohol and drugs. Eventually, every student had to turn around their paper, leaving the blank side up. The teacher collected the papers and started looking through them.  
"I see that every one of you has been in love, except one person," she said, "If you want, you may stand up if you're the one who has written this, but don't feel obligated". A girl named Avery stood up.  
"Alright, Avery, could I ask you some questions?" the teacher asked.  
"Sure, why not?" Avery said and she looked calm and comfortable.  
"Have you never ever been in love?" the teacher asked.  
"Not once ma'am," Avery said.  
"Haven't you bet a special someone yet, or is there another reason?" The teacher asked.  
"I identify as aromantic and asexual, ma'am," Avery said and the clause applauded her honesty and bravery. Avery sat down and the teacher went on.  
"So two of you admit to have been in love with someone of the same gender," she said, "if you want to, you may stand up, but you don't have to". Jude and Connor looked at each other while someone in the class giggled.  
"What's so funny, Tom?" the teacher asked.  
"Well… who would it be?" Tom joked, remembering his conversation with Jude and Connor on the bench. Jude and Connor stood up, both laughing at Tom's comment.  
"Ah, Jude and Connor! Surprising! Normally, boys your age don't admit to having had feelings for another boy, because they want to be seen as cool and macho. Do you mind to answer a few questions?" the teacher asked, and the two boys both said that it was no problem.  
"Did you feel uncomfortable loving someone of the same gender?" she then asked.  
"No," both boys said in unison.  
"That's good! Did you ever love a male classmate, or someone else close?" she asked.  
"Yes," Jude said, and Connor said he had too.  
"That could be complicated," the teacher said, apparently oblivious to Jude and Connor's relation. The class did their best not to laugh, playing along to the game.  
"Do you dare to confess who?" the teacher asked the boys, not expecting a reply.  
"Jude," Connor said at the exact same time that Jude Called out Connor's name. The teacher smiled and stood up.  
"Now that's quite a confession to make," she said.  
"Well no, actually," Jude said, "we confessed that to each other over a year ago and we've been dating ever since. We're boyfriends". The class started laughing at the astonished face of their teacher.  
"Really everyone in the class new this already, that's why Tom started laughing," Connor explained.  
"Then you must be the first two to come out at this school," the teacher said and the class started laughing again.  
"What's so funny?" the teacher asked.  
"My mother's a lesbian," Jude explained.  
"And what does that have to do with this school?" the teacher asked, getting a little upset that she got laughed at.  
"His mother is Lena Adams-Foster, vice-principal of this school," Connor told her.  
Poor woman, she doesn't know anything, Jude thought, but he chuckled.

The bell rang before any more questions on the questionnaire could be discussed and the students walked out, still laughing at the class that had just passed. Jude and Connor were still laughing and talking about that they teacher didn't know about their relation and not even about Lena being gay. They entered their English class and were greeted by Timothy, their favourite teacher. They were discussing a book called 'To Kill A Mockingbird' by Harper Lee, a book about two kids whose father is a lawyer defending a coloured man during the heights of apartheid. Jude and Connor weren't really paying attention to what Timothy was telling. Connor looked at Jude, who slipped a piece of paper in his hand. 'Wanna hang out after school?' it read and Connor nodded his head. 'When's your last class?' Connor wrote back and gave Jude the piece of paper. Jude looked at Timothy to see if he was watching, and as Jude saw that Timothy wasn't watching, he wrote a not back to Connor. 'Geography is my last class'. Connor smiled and wrote that geography was his last class as well.  
"Jude, Connor, would you please pay attention to what I'm trying to teach?" Timothy asked.  
"We were!" Jude protested.  
"Then you tell me what the ambiguity of the title of this book is, " Timothy said.  
"I'm sorry Sir?" Jude asked.  
"The title can be explained in two ways, which ways?" Timothy asked.  
"Well there is this one passage where Atticus literally talks about how it's wrong to kill mockingbirds…" Jude said.  
"Yes, that's one," Timothy said.  
"I'm sorry, Sir, I don't know the other one," Jude admitted.  
"And that's why it's important to listen. Try to keep your focus. As I was saying, the other meaning is judging innocent creatures or people, like Tom Robinson, accused and found guilty of abuse and rape, while he was innocent, as the girl had lied about being raped and her father had abused her. So that's the second explanation. Killing referring to Tom Robinson being sentenced to death, and the mockingbird being Tom Robinson himself," Timothy continued his lecture on the book. Jude and Connor made sure to listen, as they knew that if they didn't, Lena would be informed. Jude figured that was one of the cons of being the son of the vice-principal. Overall, it had more advantages than disadvantages though, so Jude decided he liked being the son of the vice-principal. It gave a sense of security knowing that whatever was wrong, on school or in his personal life, he could always go to Lena.

When Timothy's class was over, the class got dismissed and Jude and Connor walked over to the cafeteria. They got their lunches and headed for their usual bench. They sat down and Connor took Jude's hand.  
"Connor, I'm hungry," Jude said.  
"Well, then eat," Connor replied while laughing.  
"Can I have my hand back?" Jude asked.  
"Nah, you can eat with one hand, I'm gonna hold onto this one," Connor said and Jude sighed. He took one of his sandwiches in his right hand and took a bite.  
"See? It works pretty good!" Connor said and they both laughed.

The first time they'd walked hand in hand, Connor had been walking on the left side and since then, he always made a point to stand, walk, sit and lie on the left side of Jude. After more than a year, they had gotten used to it and Jude automatically went to Connor's right side when he and Connor saw each other. If Jude would walk on the left side, both boys would immediately notice that something was wrong, even though nobody else would. Nobody really realized that Jude and Connor were always standing in the same order, but the boys did. Jude knew Connor's right side better than Connor left side, whereas Connor knew Jude's left side a lot better than his right. Jude could picture Connor's right side even when Connor wasn't with him. He knew every mole, every little hair and even every zit on the right side of Connor's face. Neither of the boys could draw well, but if they could, they'd be able to perfectly draw each other's one side from memory, with every little detail included. The bell finally rang and Jude and Connor went to their last class, still holding hands. They went into the classroom and the teacher asked for silence, wanting to start the class. The class got quiet and another long hour started.

Five minutes before the bell, Connor slipped a note in Jude's hand. Jude unfolded it under his desk while he looked if the teacher was watching. When Jude saw that the teacher wasn't, he leaned backwards and read the note. ' I gotta piss real badly, wait at the bench'. Jude nodded to Connor, and when the bell rang, Connor had already packed and sprinted out of the classroom. Jude packed slowly, went to his locker to change books and headed over to the bench. Connor arrived five minutes later, and to Jude's astonishment, he had a box of chocolates with him.  
"For you," Connor said, giving Jude the box.  
"But… why?" Jude asked.  
"Because! Jude, I'm in love, love isn't rational, and neither am I. There is no reason needed to buy the love of my life, such a beautiful boy, some chocolate. See it as a thank you for making me so happy!" Connor said, looking like a puppy whose owner had just come back from a few hours at work. Jude was speechless.  
"How can I make this up to you? I mean, you make me just as happy! Maybe you even make me happier than I make you!" Jude said.  
"No, I don't! No chance!" Connor said.  
"Alright, it's a tie. But please, how can I repay you?" Jude asked.  
"Well… A chocolate wouldn't hurt… Or a kiss," Connor said suggestively. Jude laughed as he kissed Connor on his lips.  
"You're getting both," he said as he opened the box of chocolates and fed Connor one. Connor looked all happy now and Jude lied down with his head in Connor's lap. They still got stares at school, even though everybody knew, but they didn't care, nor did it stop them from showing affection for each other.  
"Oh God, I love you so much," Jude said as he ate another chocolate, and gave Connor one as well. Connor just smiled, getting warm from his boyfriend's sweet voice (and just maybe also because of the chocolate).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Shopping for Presents".


	22. Chapter 22

CHAPTER 22- SHOPPING FOR PRESENTS

With Christmas coming up, the Adams-Foster family had their own tradition of having secret Santa's. Christmas time in the Adams-Foster household was a busy, stressful time, but somehow everyone eventually seemed to enjoy it. This year would be Jude and Callie's second Christmas with this family, and both of them really looked forward to seeing if this Christmas would be just as chaotic and emotional as last year. They still recalled the problems that Stef had had when she found out that her mother had gotten a fortune of money after her dad had died. Stef had never been fond of the way her mother seemed to throw money away, but this time, it resulted in the best presents ever: College funds for every child in the family. That was the turning point in that first Christmas with the Fosters. That was the point when everything changed from chaotic and stressful to a joyful evening. Stef's mother wouldn't come over this year, and neither would Lena's parents (who again decided to spend Christmas with Lena's half-brother Nate), and so Connor and Erin were invited to witness the already chaotic family grow even more chaotic.

"Are you sure you want to be here?" Jude asked Connor.  
"Of course I am! I want to celebrate it with you! I recall last year, when it was just me and… well… Adam, and it wasn't really pleasant. A book on baseball and two black eyes were the presents I got…" Connor replied and Jude sensed that Connor was having difficulties coping with his past.  
"This year that'll be very different! You'll get to see this family getting more chaotic than ever and you just have to sit back and enjoy! Oh and buy someone a present of course! Who are you a secret Santa to?" Jude said.  
"I'm not gonna tell you! The name is secret Santa for a reason!" Connor said, stressing the word 'secret'.  
"Then I won't tell you either!" Jude said.  
"Fine, I don't want to know, you see, I like this game," Connor replied.

The way this game worked is that a few weeks upfront, they'd all sit together and write their names on strips of paper. All the strips were put in a basket and everyone took a strip. The person they had picked was the person whom they'd have to buy a present for. If they picked themselves, they had to throw it back in the basket and pick another one, so that they wouldn't have to buy themselves a present. Last year, Jude had drawn Callie's name from the basket. When he went to the store, he found a lovely bracelet that he was sure Callie would like. The only problem had been that it was above the budget they'd settled on. The budget was $40, and this bracelet had costed $100. Jude had therefore slipped it in his pocket and had walked out of the store. The day after, he felt bad about himself and so he returned to the store to give it back. Upon hearing his story, the store clerk had given Jude a 60% discount on the bracelet, allowing Jude to pay for it and give it to Callie anyway. There hasn't been a day since last Christmas on which Jude hadn't seen Callie wearing it, and Callie had gotten attached to it.

This year, Jude had picked Erin, and Jude wanted to buy her something really special. He wanted to give her something that would give her the best memories she could possibly have about her first Christmas with her son since she was forced to leave his life for nine years. He wasn't sure what to get her, but he had some ideas. He wanted to ask Connor about it, but seeing as he had just told him he wouldn't say who he was secret Santa to, he couldn't ask him.  
Connor had drawn Jude's name out of the basket, and he was glad for that, as he didn't know the others well enough to buy them a fitting Christmas present, something which seemed to be highly valued in this household. He wasn't sure what he should give Jude, but he wanted to make it something really gay, something that would make Jude blush, because he loved the face Jude made when he blushed.

"So when shall we go to the store?" Jude asked.  
"I don't know, tomorrow?" Connor replied, "There are few other options, Christmas is in three days."  
"Oh, yea, totally forgot," Jude said, a bit panicked, cursing at himself for procrastinating these things so long.  
"See you tomorrow then?" Connor asked.  
"See you tomorrow," Jude replied and with that, Connor kissed him and left to go home.

"I'm so excited to see who my secret Santa will be!" Mariana said during dinner.  
"Well, you'll have to wait three more days, won't you?" Jesus teased her.  
"Oh, like it's ever not you! You have had Mariana for four years in a row now!" Stef said.  
"Well, that was coincidence, and maybe I don't have her this time! You won't know cause I'm keeping my mouth shut!" Jesus said.  
"Just in case, I want such a cute bracelet as Callie has!" Mariana whispered in Jesus' ear, just loud enough for Jude to hear it too. Jude started to blush and smile at the way Mariana talked about the bracelet he had given Callie.  
"Noted," Jesus replied to Mariana.  
"So you do have me?" Mariana asked.  
"I'm not saying that!" Jesus replied.  
"Yes you did!" Mariana said, looking sternly at Jesus, who sighed.  
"Alright, yes, I am your not-so-secret-anymore Santa," Jesus admitted and the family laughed at the fact that Jesus couldn't resist his twin sister.  
"So, Jude, have you picked Connor's name?" Mariana asked.  
"No, actually I didn't," Jude said, and his expression didn't change, which was enough for Mariana to know that he indeed hadn't picked Connor, as Mariana could sense it very easily when her younger brother lied.  
"Alright, but perhaps he has you!" Mariana teased him.  
"Maybe, maybe not, we'll see," Jude answered, not wanting to think about what would happen if Connor actually did pick Jude. Jude figured that Connor would get him something terribly cheesy, something that had to do with how much Connor loved Jude or something like that.

The next morning, Connor stood at the doorstep at exactly nine o'clock. The boys hadn't communicated a time on which they'd go to the stores, but Connor wanted to be there early so that they'd have loads of time, probably giving him a few moments to stealthily buy something for Jude and then hide it from his sight. Jude was ready around ten o'clock and so that was when they made their way over to the mall to begin their search. Jude couldn't resist asking Connor about his idea, because he needed Connor for it anyway to actually get the present right.  
"Can I let you in on a secret?" Jude asked.  
"Sure you can, always, unless it's about who you gotta buy a present for!" Connor said.  
"Actually it is about that… See I need you to help me a little," Jude answered.  
"I see, so you either got me, or my mum…" Connor answered.  
"I got your mum, and I was thinking about something special for her," Jude said.  
"She deserves that, what were you thinking about?" Connor asked.  
"Well I was thinking that since she missed such a big part of your life, I'd make her a collage of pictures of you from those nine years she's missed," Jude replied.  
"I think that's a great idea!" Connor replied. They went into a store and Jude looked around, trying to find a big frame where he could place his collage in. He didn't find it, but he knew of a place where he could, so he and Connor went there, as Connor couldn't find anything for Jude either. Jude bought a picture frame that was big enough, around the same size as a poster, and some sturdy paper of the same height and width on which he could glue all the pictures. They went into a lot of stores, but Connor couldn't find anything special enough for Jude, so eventually they went back to the Adams-Foster residence, deciding that the next day, they'd go over to Connor's so that Jude could collect a lot of pictures from Connor's childhood to make his collage.

When Jude came by next morning, Connor had already gathered a few pictures, but he knew that there were some more in his game room, as he had seen them when he was searching for the picture of his dad with his boyfriend, Chris. Jude followed him to the attic and there, the two boys started to search through the old photobooks again, taking out every picture of the young Connor they could find. Eventually, the pile of photo's was big, and Jude thought that they'd found enough pictures for him to use on the collage, so he carefully tucked the photographs in the pocket of his coat, where he was sure that Erin wouldn't see them. Just as they were about to go downstairs again, it dawned on Jude that Connor hadn't bought anything yet.  
"Shouldn't you go and buy something? I mean, Christmas is here in two days, and you still need to buy a present!" Jude said.  
"Chill out, I already got a present," Connor said.  
"Oh?" Jude replied, feeling a little weird that he was sure that Connor hadn't bought anything at the mall yesterday, and Connor had told him that he didn't have anything the day before.  
"Yeah, when I was on my way back home yesterday, I decided to have a little detour, as I remembered a shop where I just knew I could find something," Connor replied.  
"I see, good that you have something, I was starting to worry you wouldn't be on time," Jude said.  
"No reason to worry," Connor said as he kissed Jude on his nose.  
"I'd better get going, I have a lot to do to prepare this present," Jude said while pointing at the pictures.  
"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow!" Connor said.  
"Yes you will!" Jude replied, after which Jude climbed down the narrow staircase and walked himself out as Connor started up his T.V. to play games.

When Jude came home, he went up to his room, got rid of everything on his desk, making just enough room for the whole sheet of paper. He sat down on his bed, where he looked through the pictures, and more often than not, small sounds escaped from his mouth, seeing how adorable Connor looked when he was younger. It made him wish that he'd known Connor back then, as he wanted to see Connor like that for real. But, like Erin, he had to do it with just the pictures, so he scanned in all the pictures before he pasted them on the sheet of paper, making sure to save them on his computer so that he could look at them whenever he wanted.  
In the meantime, Connor was alone in his room. He was dying to know who had picked him and what he'd get from that person. He knew that his mother hadn't picked him, because she would have told him, he was sure of that. It had to be someone in the Adams-Foster family, but he didn't know who, and he just hoped that whoever it was, that person would give him an appropriate present, but he doubted it, as he knew that nobody in the Adams-Foster family knew him that well, except for Jude, who he was sure hadn't picked him.  
He started wrapping his present for Jude. He was sure that Jude would be slightly embarrassed at first, but that he would love it eventually, even though he probably would not admit that he liked it. He smirked to himself as he mentally saw the image of Jude unwrapping his present, and it made him wish that Christmas would come soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Christmas Present".


	23. Chapter 23

CHAPTER 23 – CHRISTMAS PRESENT

"Merry Christmas!" Stef said when she answered the door and saw Connor and Erin.  
"Merry Christmas, Stef," Connor said as he walked in and placed his and Erin's presents under the tree.  
"Jude's upstairs, love," Stef said when she saw Connor looking around for Jude. Connor thanked her and hurriedly went upstairs, where he found Jude still in bed. He lied down on the bed himself, careful not to wake up Jude. With his face so near his boyfriend's, it took him everything he had not to kiss Jude. Instead, he ran his hand through Jude's soft hair. Jude didn't wake up, which gave Connor some more time to look at his boyfriend. Connor thought that Jude was absolutely gorgeous when he was sleeping. He couldn't think of anything cuter than Jude Adams Foster asleep. After a while, though, the urge to kiss Jude became too big, so Connor placed his lips on Jude's. Connor knew that this was one of the easiest ways to wake up Jude. And indeed, Jude's eyes slowly opened and upon seeing his boyfriend above him, he freed his arms from underneath the blankets and embraced Connor, who proceeded to lay his head on Jude's chest.  
"Good morning, my love," Connor said cheerfully.  
"Good morning," Jude said groggily.  
"Also, merry Christmas!" Connor said even more cheerful. It didn't occur to Jude that it was Christmas day before now, and Jude shot up.  
"Merry Christmas!" he shouted, suddenly wide awake. Connor grinned at Jude, while Jude got up and rushed to the bathroom to empty his bladder. As Jude got out of the bathroom, he saw that Connor had laid down the most gorgeous suit for him on his bed.  
"What is this?" Jude asked.  
"My present for you!" Connor replied.  
"Connor, we shouldn't get our presents yet!" Jude protested.  
"Who says you're getting a present from me this evening? Perhaps I'm not your secret Santa!" Connor teased.  
"Then why did you get me this?" Jude asked, which made Connor feel a little uneasy, thinking Jude didn't like it.  
"Because I wanted to give you something, I love you," Connor said.  
"You're too sweet," Jude teased, kissing Connor right after.  
"Put it on! I want to see you wearing it!" Connor said, and Jude did what he was told. Connor turned around, not so much to give Jude privacy, as the two got accustomed to changing clothes in front of each other, but to let himself have this surprise. Upon hearing that Jude was done, Connor turned around and his pupils widened.

"Can you see it?" Jude asked, seeing Connor checking him out.  
"You're just…" Connor begin, but he couldn't finish the sentence.  
"Too hot?" Jude teased.  
"Hot damn!" Connor said. Jude laughed and took both of Connor's hands, pulling him closer.  
"Thank you, I love it and I love you," Jude said.  
"No problem," Connor breathed, just before the two locked their lips together.

When the boys eventually walked into the living room half an hour later, the rest of the family was already sitting together. Everybody's mouths fell open upon seeing Jude.  
"Wow, you look amazing!" Callie said, walking over to Jude to investigate him.  
"You do, Judicorn!" Mariana said when she caught Jude blushing. Jude felt Connor take his hand and he looked up to his boyfriend, who gave him a reassuring smile.  
"Thanks," Jude said, genuinely flattered.

Most of the day was spent by just hanging around with each other, together with helping Lena in the kitchen, preparing their tradition lasagne for the Christmas dinner. It was a little stress relief for Stef that her mother hadn't come this year, and Lena didn't mind her parents being over at her half-brother Natham either, as this made Christmas a somewhat more peaceful time. With just their own kids to worry about, Stef and Lena felt more at ease with this year's Christmas than they had felt with any of the previous years. Even before Stef and Lena decided to take in Callie and Jude, Christmas had been a stressful time for the family, and it felt nice to have a quiet year. All presents were carefully laid down under the tree, not one missing, and all the decorations lightened up the house a lot, so just being in the house made everybody warm and cosy.

The dinner was perfect. The lasagne wasn't burned, like the year before, when Stef and her mother got in a heated discussion, thus overheating the lasagne. But this year, nothing like that happened and Lena had managed to get the lasagne out of the oven at exactly the right time, and it was great. Of course, Erin asked Lena the recipe, and Lena promised to give it to her at the end of the evening, and they all ate silently. It really felt like it was one family, even now Connor and Erin were there. Of course, Jude saw Erin and Connor as family, but none of the others did, but this dinner and this day made everybody feel like they were one big family. Most of all did Erin feel like she had finally found her way in San Diego. She'd been living in San Diego for a while now, but the only two people she frequently spoke were Connor and Jude. Now she felt like she had found more people to possibly be friends with: Stef and Lena, both whom were about her own age. After Adam, Erin hadn't been too keen on dating anymore, and so she had lived alone in Minnesota and she wasn't planning on starting a relationship, but who knows what might come on her path?

After Dinner, it was present time, and this was the time where all the children had waited for. Everybody gathered around the Christmas tree. Erin, who was the newest of the group, got to unpack her present first. Jude gave it to her, and she took it. She examined it before she opened the wrapping, trying to guess what it was. When she couldn't guess, she ripped open the paper, and when she had removed all wrapping paper, she gasped and put her hand in front of her mouth. Tears filled her eyes as she saw the collage Jude had made. She scanned each picture of her infant son with her eyes and a few tears rolled down her cheek, seeing what she had missed. There were even some photos of Jude and Connor together in the bottom right corner. Jude had made sure that the pictures were approximately in chronological order, starting on the top left corner with Connor as toddler and ending up with Connor as he was now. Erin passed it around so that the others could have a look as well, and everybody agreed that this was perhaps the best present Jude could have gotten Erin, and Erin agreed.

The basic system was that whoever got the present should give his or her present directly after, so it was Erin's turn to give her present. She took a small, yellow present from underneath the tree and gave it to Stef. Stef opened it and saw two bottles of wine, one red and one white.  
"I didn't know what to get you, I don't know you that well…," Erin said, but Stef reassured her that she loved the present and that it was perfect. Stef then got to give her present, which was for Brandon. She gave him a sustain pedal for his keyboard, one which Brandon had wanted for a while now. Brandon was totally happy and almost forgot to give his present to Callie. What he had gotten Callie was something special. Seeing as Jude had made her so happy with the bracelet the year before, Brandon thought that a similar necklace would make Callie crazy, so he got her that. When Callie opened it, she indeed loved the present. Callie put it around her neck and then walked over to the tree to grab her present for Lena. She had gotten Lena some really nice earrings, which Lena immediately put in, stating that they were as gorgeous as Stef was. Stef blushed as she handed Lena her present for Jesus. Jesus got a new singlet for his wrestling matches, with his name on the back, and he was totally happy with it. He had wanted a new one for a long time, and especially with his name on the back, it made it truly special to him. Of course, like always, Jesus was Mariana's secret Santa. He had actually listened to her this year, and given her a beautiful bracelet. It wasn't at all like the one Callie had gotten from Jude the year before, but still, Mariana was satisfied, but most of all totally in love with the bracelet.

Then it was Mariana's turn to give her present. It was for Connor, like Connor already knew, as only he and Jude hadn't gotten their presents yet. Mariana gave Connor a small package, and Connor tried to guess what it was, but like his mother, he couldn't figure it out. He opened it and two cd's fell in his lap. Looking at them, Connor noticed that every song that meant something special to him and Jude was on it. Mariana had wanted to get Connor something meaningful, so she had asked Jude for his help. Jude had come up with this idea, and Mariana had loved it. Jude had given her the names of all the songs and she had put them together on a cd. Connor was almost as teary as his mother had been upon receiving her present, so Mariana and Jude knew that they had succeeded in getting Connor the perfect present. Then Jude realized something.  
"So that means that you had picked me after all!" He said to Connor.  
"Yes, I did," Connor said, a mysterious grin appearing on his face as he got super excited about his present for Jude. The present was wrapped up in 6 different parts, as Jude noticed. There were five small packages and one slightly bigger package. Jude picked one of the smaller packages first, but Connor told him to unwrap the biggest first, and so Jude did. He teared the wrapping paper, and he found himself holding a teddy bear. He looked at Connor questioningly, but Connor only wiggled his eyebrows, motivating Jude to take the first smaller package. It was soft, almost as soft as the first package had been. He opened it and a black piece of cloth fell onto his lap. He unfolded it and saw it was a tiny t-shirt with a text on it.  
I promise  
"Now take the other three with red wrappings," Connor urged Jude, and Jude did. As he opened the first one, another small t-shirt with a text on it laid in his lap.  
I love you  
The third package had the same format as the earlier two, only this was a red shirt with another text.  
I am super gay for you  
The third one was similar, only this shirt was a dark shade of blue and the text was something Jude had said a long time ago.  
Warpaint  
"These are the three most memorable things you have said to me," Connor explained, and Jude relived each moment in his mind.

How they sat together during the school party, Connor questioning Jude's love for him, and Jude promising that he liked Connor.  
I promise  
How Jude and Connor took a little time alone after Callie's official adoption, as they wanted to be alone for a little while, just the two of them celebrating that Jude and Callie finally had been reunited. That was when Jude first said it to Connor.  
I love you  
How Jude had come back to Connor during the LGBT-prom, after first not wanting to label himself as gay, but upon having a conversation with someone who told him to take pride in it and embrace the labels, as labels can bring a sort of power. That's when he first acknowledged his own homosexuality.  
I am super gay for you  
How Jude had walked into Connor's hospital room after Connor got shot in his foot, telling Connor that no matter what, they'd be together, even if they couldn't tell Adam about them or anybody else. Connor had asked him why he was wearing nail polish again, and Jude had answered him.  
Warpaint

There was one more package to unwrap for Jude and Jude was curious to what was inside it. He quickly took it, and while he did that, he saw Connor grinning. Inside was a blue plaid miniature t-shirt for the bear. Connor was known to wear lots of plaid shirts, and so Jude figured that it was to make the bear look like Connor, but upon looking at Connor, Jude realized something else. It was not just any plaid shirt, it was a miniature version of the plaid shirt Connor was wearing at that moment.  
"Oh my God," Jude breathed.  
"You like it?" Connor asked.  
"I love it," Jude answered, not aware of his family members sitting around them, looking at how cute the two boys were together. Connor gave Jude a kiss on his lips and then they took their own seats again.

The rest of the evening was reserved for the children to either watch a movie or to enjoy their new gifts, so Jude and Connor went upstairs to Jude's room. Erin went home, as she had a severe headache and needed to take some rest. Arriving in Jude's room, Connor placed one of the cd's in the cd player and it started playing. In the meantime, Jude dressed his bear in the plaid shirt, making him look a little like Connor.  
"I can't choose which cute little bear to cuddle," Jude said.  
"Hey! I'm not cute, and not little either!" Connor protested.  
"You are hella cute, and you know it! And yes, you are my little teddy bear," Jude teased.  
"Fine, but please cuddle with me then," Connor said. Jude didn't hesitate further and embraced Connor, pulling him with him on his bed. Connor took the teddy bear off of Jude's pillow.  
"What are you doing?" Jude asked.  
"Hugging your teddy bear," Connor replied.  
"Why? You can cuddle me!" Jude said.  
"I can cuddle both, and if you let me cuddle this bear, it will smell like me tonight when you cuddle with it in bed," Connor explained.  
"You know I don't do that anymore," Jude said.  
"I do have the feeling that you will tonight," Connor said with a wink.  
"Dork," Jude teased, pulling Connor in for a kiss again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: always-jonnor-love-.-tumblr-.-com-/-ask(Without the dashes, but otherwise this site wouldn't let me post it).  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!  
> The next chapter is called "Dancing Snowly".


	24. Chapter 24

CHAPTER 24 – DANCING SNOWLY

When Connor's cd was finished, the two boys looked up. They had been cuddling for nearly an hour, and so it was eleven o'clock.  
"I should get home," Connor said.  
"No, please, stay with me for a while longer," Jude said.  
"Sorry, I really do have to get home, I promised my mum I'd be home by twelve, and I'd rather be a little early that late," Connor replied. Jude reluctantly agreed and so the two boys walked downstairs after Connor took his cd out of Jude's cd player. The two boys went downstairs, where they found Stef in the kitchen, cleaning the dishes from dinner.

"I'm going home," Connor announced. Stef looked up and smiled.  
"Sure, honey. Be safe!" she said.  
"I'm gonna walk him home," Jude said while pulling on his coat.  
"You don't have to," Connor said.  
"I want to," Jude said, giving him a kiss on his cheek.

They walked outside and got on their way. The fresh snow made a satisfying sound underneath their shoes. When the boys were halfway, they crossed a field of grass, where Jude suddenly stopped.

"What's the matter?" Connor asked as Jude took out his phone.  
"Wait one second," Jude answered as he was frantically searching something on his phone. Suddenly, music erupted from the device.  
"Take my hands," Jude instructed. Connor did and Jude started dancing to the music.

Love of my life  
Look deep in my eyes  
There you will find what you need

And give me your life  
The lust and the lies  
And the past you're afraid I might see  
You've been running away from me, yeah

You're my beloved  
Lover, I'm yours  
And Death shall not part us  
It's you I'd die for  
For better or worse  
Forever we'll be  
My love it unites us and it binds you to me  
It's a mystery

Love of my life  
Look deep in my eyes  
There you will find what you need

I'm your giver of life  
I'll clothe you in white  
My immaculate pride you will be  
Oh, come running home to me, yeah

You're my beloved  
Lover I'm yours  
And Death shall not part us  
It's you I'd die for  
For better or worse  
Forever we'll be  
My love it unites us and it binds you to me, yeah

You've been my mister, my life  
Chasing lovers that won't satisfy  
Won't you let me make you my pride  
You will drink of my lips and you'll taste new life

You're my beloved  
Lover I'm yours  
And Death shall not part us  
It's you I'd die for  
For better or worse  
Forever we'll be  
My love it unites us and it binds you to me  
It's a mystery

Jude started singing half way through, adding up to the effect that brought tears into Connor's eyes. When the song had ended, Jude stopped leading the dance and the two boys just stood there, looking at each other. Finally, they both leaned in for a kiss. When they broke apart again, some people started clapping, and the boys were brought back into reality again. They smiled and blushed as the people continued clapping. Some people even came to them for a small talk, but soon, the boys were on their way again.

When they reached Connor's house, Connor invited Jude in, but Jude refused, saying he had to be home soon, so they just sat on the front porch for a while, Jude's head on Connor's shoulder. Jude sighed, whishing this moment would never end. Connor gave him a kiss on the top of his head. Jude stood up, and Connor followed his example. The two embraced each other, as Jude whispered in Connor's ear that he had to go back. One last deep kiss, and Jude turned his back towards Connor and started walking away. He looked back a few times to find Connor still on the front porch, until the moment Jude was no longer in sight. Connor then went inside and found his mother in bed already. He quietly went upstairs, to his room, where he took his headphones and started listening to some music, thinking about Jude.

When Jude reached his home, he went inside. He found his mothers in the kitchen, where they were drinking wine and talking.  
"Hey love, Connor home safely?" Lena asked.  
"Yeah, and I'm gonna go to bed," Jude said, yawning just shortly after.  
"I understand, goodnight, dear," Stef said as she kissed Jude.

Jude went upstairs where he found the bear Connor had given him still in its place. Remembering Connor's words, Jude picked up the bear and held it against his cheek.  
"You were right Connor, I am gonna sleep with it," Jude whispered. He laid the bear on his pillow as he changed into his pyjamas. He then took the bear in his arms and laid down under the blanket and comforter. Smelling Connor's scent, Jude fell asleep, the bear tightly in his arms

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own anything recognizable.  
> I hope you've enjoyed this fiction!

**Author's Note:**

> Authors note:  
> I do not own any characters or anything recognizable.  
> I hope you'll enjoy this chapter, let me know what you think via a message on here, or use my askbox on tumblr: alwaysjonnorlove.tumblr.com/ask.  
> Please let me know what you think, your opinion means a great deal to me!


End file.
